Can't sleep due to debt?

Hiddenidenity

Lucy_89 wrote: »

Sometimes I wish I could just forgive him and let him back into my life so things could return to how they were before.

Definitely phone stepchange, it will be hard but it will get better.

It can only get better once you've made the call. That doesn't mean easy but definitely better.

Secondly the bit I've quoted. It doesn't work. I've done it, several times. It always ends in a disaster and usually one bigger than the previous time.

You're not alone x

Candyapple

Did your ex agree to pay for the £13k loan? Has he ever made any repayments?

Did he also agree to pay half of the £5k loan for the holiday given that I assume he was going on it too?

enthusiasticsaver

Hard lesson to learn and you are by no means the first to be on this forum after taking debts out for their OH and then OH scarpers leaving someone else with their debts. I wish anyone reading your story who is in a relationship (especially if not married) would take note it is never a good idea to take on debts for other people no matter how close they are to you at the time.

I think it is a good idea to contact stepchange but I would also contact your lenders to see if the loan borrowing could be restructured or the credit card interest stopped to stop the debt rising higher.

macman

Others have mentioned it already, but it's worth repeating: if you can take in a lodger, even if only on a temporary basis, then your monthly shortfall is wiped out at a stroke. You can currently earn up to £7,500 pa tax-free by doing this, so if practical, it's a no-brainer. It would cover your mortgage, with something left over.

Lucy_89

Hi everyone,

I am sorry for taking so long to get back, I have had a busy time of it.

My boyfriend has now moved back in, and we have agreed to tackle the issue head on. We will be doing a combined budget planner and putting everything down in black and white and will see what realistically is the best way forward.

badmemory

The best advice I have is to get yourself a savings account/emergency fund that he knows nothing about. Just make sure that you are not back here in 2 years time with £50k of debt!

Saver-upper

Hi Lucy.
I am glad you have been able to work things out with your boyfriend.Do look after yourself,though,and I think a "squirrel account",that your boyfriend knows nothing about,is a very good idea.I hope you are able to work things out together.
Keep posting on here-you will get wonderful advice along your journey.
Take care x

sammyjammy

I feel really sad for you but if its what you want I hope it works out, agree with the comments to set aside some individual savings.