Mrs S, family life and debt

MeandO

I feel for you hun, I am exactly the same and never went to baby groups and, because this is not the area that I'm from, I have no friends or people I can call upon around me here. I found living alone extremely lonely and sometimes still do, but it gets easier. The key is to keep yourself busy - clear out cupboards, paint a room, rearrange furniture, have a nice hot bath with a magazine or book, batch cook for the freezer, sort the children's clothes/toys out - basically, anything just to give you something to do. I did go to the gym too, but later on I really couldn't afford it so gave it up. Saying that, no-one ever spoke to each other at my gym so it wasn't for conversation! Is there a fun exercise class or something you could do? I'm not one for this sort of thing either, but sometimes it really does help to push yourself. You only have to go once, if you hate it, you can just leave. In the Summer I like to get out on the garden, cut the grass and do a bit of weeding or plant things. It's nice just being outdoors.
Perhaps give your Mum or a friend a ring for a good catch up or natter for half an hour in the evenings, it will feel like you've had some adult conversation then.

I was also shopping much more than I neeed to, but quickly realised I couldn't afford to keep it up.

If you don't feel like doing any of the above, then always come on here and keep posting. It really helped me at the time and there's always someone around to cheer you on!

x

MrsSave

It's been a while. Things are ok.

I checked hmrc online over last weekend and it had been updated to show tax credits, the first payment came into my account yesterday. I'm so amazed at how fast it all happened. I haven't had a letter from them detailing anything, but I'm sure it's in the post!!

Other people have started to stick their noses in........he's had messages saying that I'm only after his money (what money :rotfl: ) and that he should protect himself, etc. This was from someone who doesn't know me, over the years me and mr S were together I could probably count on one hand the amount of times this person has spoken with me. Thankfully mr S told me what was going on, and sent a message back to this person telling them to mind their own business (with a few expletives :rotfl: ).

I had my break away in the spa. It was amazing!! I would love to be back there now!!!

The boys seem to be doing ok. The eldest is starting to become far more cheeky, but this often happens a few weeks back into school after holidays. I'm trying to crack down on it at the moment and he is on a tv ban today!

MeandO

Great news on the tax credits

Ignore the idiots who try and interfere, I had that too. My ex's side of the family 'dumped' me overnight despite over ten years of being 'my' family too and me being nothing but tolerant and loving towards them all those years. I now have nothing to do with them. I learnt the hard way that it is better to rid my life of those people who only bring negativity to your life.

My boy is the same with school, so I'm sure it's just being around the other kids that make them cheeky!

Glad to hear you enjoyed the spa weekend, I'm sure it was a much-needed break away! Maybe start a little savings pot towards going back? Will give you something to look forward to and focus on.
Hope you have a lovely weekend x

MrsSave

Thank you MeandO. Looking forward I'm not sure it's something I'm going to fit into my budget! Things are going to be tighter here from now on. I've spent this morning looking at my budget, making sure I'm putting money aside each month for anything the boys will need, their clubs, school uniform, clothes, etc. It looks like I'll have £50 per week to cover food and any other bits that we need (household bits, a snack out, parking, etc.). Petrol, haircuts, gifts, parties, etc. have all been budgeted for (as well as a little each month aside for things like school holiday times so that we can do something nice).

£50 a week isn't much, but I'm sure people get by on a lot less. If I can try to get my grocery shop down to £30-£35 a week, it will leave £15-£20 'spare'. I'm going food shopping tomorrow after dropping my eldest off at school so will aim to stick to my budget, but making sure there's plenty of nutritious food for my boys.

We've had a letter home from school with this term's calendar on, which reminded me that World Book Day is coming up. If i start to plan what he will wear soon, I can hopefully do something on a budget, but that looks good! I'm going to have a look through his bookshelf later and narrow down some ideas, and then give him the final choice.

My main aim is that the boys aren't affected by a tighter budget.

MrsSave

After receiving the money a few months ago, I paid off the majority of the debt. One was still there, though, as I figured having savings was important as well. Yesterday MrS transferred half what was owed to me, so I've used my savings to pay off the rest. I've made the payment this morning (minus the direct debit which is due to go out on Monday). This means that by Monday I will be debt free (other than the mortgage). :j I do still have a little savings. I've got £2000 which I'll be transferring to premium bonds later today, and a little extra which I'm trying to add to so that I can re decorate the boys' rooms within the next 6 months.

This also means that I won't be paying the almost £80 a month, so will have almost £20 a week extra to go towards food/spare money. This will be taking a massive weight off my shoulders.

Don't think you're getting rid of me though. I need this diary, and I need the debt free wannabe boards!!!

I spent £35.10 on the food shopping yesterday. 10p over budget. I went to Aldi and Tesco (they're so nice and quiet at 9am on a Monday morning!!).

I've pretty much sorted February finances (other than physically moving the money around - that will be tomorrow once my wages from work are in). I've sorted it all on ynab.

Today I need to contact my council to see what happens with a council tax refund. I've had a letter to say I'm due over £70, but no information about how to get it! Will sort that today, and the money will go into the savings for the boys' rooms. I also need to finish sorting house insurance. I've had my renewal through, and it's going up around £5 a month. I spent a while having a look around yesterday, but I'm not finding it much cheaper.

I have a load of laundry to get washing today, but a small positive is that at the moment the ironing basket is completely empty!!! I've written a list of all the chores/tasks I want to get done this week, and I'm ticking them off once they're done. The only problem is that the list is a full side of a notebook. I feel it's never ending!! I'll get there, though. It's all about routine.

*edited to add - I've just had a quick read through and my writing is awful today. Sorry!! I blame being awake since 4am!!!

wishingthemortgaheaway

Woo hooo to debt freeness.

Well done. It's now all onwards and upwards with savings.

Where's the other £60 of the £80 a month going to go?

Have a lovely, stress free, debt free day.

Wish.

MrsSave

Thanks £80 a month spare, which is £20 a week extra for food/spends (I work weekly on food and spends!).

wishingthemortgaheaway

MrsSave wrote: »

Thanks £80 a month spare, which is £20 a week extra for food/spends (I work weekly on food and spends!).

Ahhh, that makes sense.

System

That’s really good news Mrs S , it’s good to have a little extra each week.

Debt free well done.

MeandO

That is great news, well done! Being debt free will only make things easier.

I don't know if you have one near you, but I've bought quite a lot of paint/wallpaper from Home bargains & B&M before. May be useful if you're thinking of re-decorating.