Third-Life Crisis

[Deleted User]

Sorry you're having a rubbish time. Obviously you already know that, but spending more money is certainly not going to make you feel better about being weighed down with debt, but only exaggerate the problem. Try to resist and you'll feel great for having done so!
It's so hard when you're hormonal.
Maybe try and relax a little regarding the home improvements. Are they really necessary to finish off before the baby comes? I'm asking because I know a lot of mum are "nesting" and want to have their house 100%, but take it from someone who's already a mum, babies really don't care about the state of your house. They're not going to be in their own room for at least 6 months, so you have some time there. They certainly don't use the bathroom for at least 2 years haha! It's understandable you want everything to be perfect, but I promise you once your little one is here, you'll mostly just want to stare at them rather than your house. And you'll have to get used to a messy house anyway.

Goingroundincircles

You're right Moguline, thank you. I know all these things, I just don't listen to myself sometimes!
I solved the need to shop by going to the supermarket for a few things we needed and also some cake!! The one thing we really do need to do is the bathroom. The contents are currently piled up in various places around the house, the floor/floorboards are up and the bath is unusable. Apart from that, the rest is non essential.
I think I could do with a long nap today.

Goingroundincircles

Bathroom update - we should be hearing from the insurers today as to whether they'll cover it.

Work update - OH spoke to the company's accountant yesterday and apparently the invoices have been processed and will be paid at the end of the month. Not holding out too much hope as they keep telling him lies to get him off their case, but fingers crossed!

Goingroundincircles

Still no definitive answer from the insurance company. Instead they asked for a broken down quote (remove lino £xx, replace floorboards £xx for example). This is a bit of a pain though so it's taking a while. It's because they won't cover things like removing/replacing the lino because 'it wasn't glued down and is therefore classed as contents' (eye roll).

Still keeping everything crossed that the unpaid invoices are paid on Friday.

I've made the decision to bring my maternity leave forward and so will be finishing this week. It's made me feel a million times better and like I can cope with all the problems going on around us.

Looking forward to July and getting everything back on track! OH has worked incredibly hard this month so we should be able top the pots back up next month and have some money to do a couple of nice things together before the baby comes.

Kitten868

Oh no poor you what a run of bad luck! Make sure you take advantage of any advice you can - shelter for the house and local lawyers to ask one employment question for free.

Are you sure you want to take mat leave early? It means you get less time with lo. And more time being stressed about the bathroom.

Keep going. This all would have happened light bulb or not and you can keep control of the reins so it doesn't turn into it you giving up again. Xxx

Goingroundincircles

Debt totals Feb 18 - Jun 18:

Lloyds - £2880 - £2167
Halifax - £2374 - £2268
Barclaycard 1 - £6194 - £5848
Barclaycard 2 - £9192- £8910
MBNA 1 - £6158 - £5980
MBNA 2 - £3340 - £3182
MBNA 3 - £3932 - £4885 (the materials one )
MBNA 4 - £2115 - £2764
MBNA 5 - £3746 - £3494
Mum - £1695 - £1270
Tesco Loan - £9300 - £7700
Sainsburys Loan - £8398 - £7110
FIL - £2000 - £1900
TOTAL - £59,324 - £57,478

£1310 paid off the debt last month. The £1500 in the Emergency/Maternity Fund had to be wiped out due to the unpaid invoices. We have put £600 back in from July's budget thanks to husband's hard work in June. The invoices have still not been paid so we now need to start the small claims process :mad: I'm hoping that eventually we'll recoup that money and be able to put it all back into our savings pots.

Still no bathroom or agreement from the insurers. We're currently having to make do with the downstairs toilet/sink and showering at either my mum's or MIL's. Not ideal in this weather or at 36 weeks pregnant!

I have started my maternity leave. Kitten868 it was suggested by both the midwife and health visitor that I should bring it forward for health reasons - I was trying to hold off as long as possible! Currently my return to work date is 13 Aug 2019. That's with 6 months full pay, 3 months SMP, 2 months no pay and the rest accrued holiday/bank holidays/stand down. Found out I get an extra 7 days paid leave for when the office is closed over Christmas :T I also found out though that I still have to pay my pension every month, even when I'm not earning anything! So I need to rework my budget. That news plus the unpaid invoices may mean going back a month or two earlier.

Being treated to a spa day today, so off for some R&R

Goingroundincircles

Oh and not forgetting that (apart from the materials card - which we now don't use and ask for materials money up front) we haven't used a credit card yet again this month. I can't even remember the last time we did use one. Not even a sneaky 'I'll put it on the CC and then pay it off when xyz comes in next week'.

It feels good.

Kitten868

The biggest thing you have to take away is that overall your debts have gone down and that's definitely a positive. You do sound really positive about it. I can see that big chunks have been taken off your debts. Are those minimums or are you in a position to do a bit of snowballing? Be nice to have fewer creditors and would help you.

I totally, totally understand about maternity leave - I had to take it early as I had SPD so bad I couldn't walk to the toilet let alone drive. I just also know of lots of women with fine pregnancies that got bored at home - I had no idea you were struggling. You know about the pension up front so budget for it but check online as I'm not certain you have to. I think you can reduce it and then increase it later. But I've heard of similar with child care vouchers.
Good luck with the small courts xxx

Goingroundincircles

Thanks Kitten868. Sorry to hear you struggled with SPD, I can imagine what a nightmare it is!
We're just paying the minimums at the moment while we try and get a sustainable budget in place and also save for maternity/paternity leave. Then we can try and tackle the debt a bit quicker.

Goingroundincircles

Good news! The unpaid invoices have been paid - in full :j This means we've topped all our pots up, the maternity leave/emergency fund now stands at £2,100.

Now if we can just get the bathroom insurance sorted we'll be back on track :T