Disrespect - am I wrong here?

decbel

redrabbit29 wrote: »

I have been in a long term relationship now for about 5 years. I'm starting to get really really pee'd off with a few things, namely that my GF doesn't respect my space or priacy I feel

• GF just barging in and invading my privacy. NOW, before you all judge me, remember that this is something that I have tolde her before, and I have taken time out to calmly explain. Now 4-5 years later she still barges in. I'm really fed up with it.

She just walks in when I'm trying to relax, and it's just not right. I've told her again... and again.. and a a!!!!ing again... dont' walk in but she does

I'm not wishing it but I think the relationship sounds doomed.

Wizard_of_Id

Lock on the door

tommix

I agree Op..My partner believes 'Me time' is so important in a long term intimate relationship..Which is why she moved 40 miles away to Woking..:beer:

Jojo_the_Tightfisted

redrabbit29 wrote: »

I have been in a long term relationship now for about 5 years. I'm starting to get really really pee'd off with a few things, namely that my GF doesn't respect my space or priacy I feel

• GF just barging in and invading my privacy. NOW, before you all judge me, remember that this is something that I have tolde her before, and I have taken time out to calmly explain. Now 4-5 years later she still barges in. I'm really fed up with it.

She just walks in when I'm trying to relax, and it's just not right. I've told her again... and again.. and a a!!!!ing again... dont' walk in but she does

Ok, taking it slightly more seriously, I've glanced at some of your previous posts. You're in a high stress job and you have been worried about your temper and reactions to stressors before to the extent of punching yourself in the face. You also like to drink and shut yourself in the spare room to go on the internet.

It could be that she's concerned you're having an affair, that you're drinking too much or that she's just plain and simple worried for your wellbeing.

Reacting strongly to her popping her head round the door could be reinforcing her suspicion that there's something to worry about, whether it's having cybersex, drinking wayyyy too much or hurting yourself. So she pops her head in more often. You know, like when somebody yells 'I ain't done nuffin', you're just picking on me' when you're walking past or floors the accelerator as soon as you pull up behind them? It makes you think that maybe there's something dodgy going on.


If it's still how it was a few years back when a mate was in the Met, I know that admitting to being stressed is looked down upon. But it really sounds like you're overreacting, which if you genuinely don't have anything to hide, can be a sign of stress in itself. And you might need something more than locking a spare room door to deal with that - although shutting her out might seem like a good idea, it can then spiral into her still not being sure what's going on and getting more annoying out of insecurity or worry for your wellbeing.

Maybe looking at it from that perspective might help?

AylesburyDuck

redrabbit29 wrote: »

I have been in a long term relationship now for about 5 years. I'm starting to get really really pee'd off with a few things, namely that my GF doesn't respect my space or priacy I feel

• GF just barging in and invading my privacy. NOW, before you all judge me, remember that this is something that I have tolde her before, and I have taken time out to calmly explain. Now 4-5 years later she still barges in. I'm really fed up with it.

She just walks in when I'm trying to relax, and it's just not right. I've told her again... and again.. and a a!!!!ing again... dont' walk in but she does

Do you mean just barges into your home, presuming you dont live together?
If so, she's your GF not a neighbour who has to knock, get over yourself, i'm suprised she's been around 5 years, she must be a saint!

OldMotherTucker

Give it up Guys! The OP hasn't bothered to come back.

I pity his GF!

Pyxis

OldMotherTucker wrote: »

Give it up Guys! The OP hasn't bothered to come back.

I pity his GF!

I was wondering why he hadn't come back, but after reading Jojo's post, I thought that if he is a policeman, he may be on duty all over Easter and not able to reply.

Either that or he's killed her and is in a cell! :rotfl:

OldMotherTucker

Pyxis wrote: »

I was wondering why he hadn't come back, but after reading Jojo's post, I thought that if he is a policeman, he may be on duty all over Easter and not able to reply.

Either that or he's killed her and is in a cell! :rotfl:

Some people just like a good moan but won't do anything to address the problem or solve it!

Missli

I think you're lucky to have her. Everyone needs privacy, but to knock on the door like it was your teenager...noooo, sounds like she's just concerned. Hope you sort it out.

pphillips

Maybe if you didn't "relax" she wouldn't barge in on you!