Need some advise on family splitting up

t3rm3y

Hello. I have a mortgage with my partner (not married) we have 2 children).
The relationship is not working and it is a very bad atmosphere for the children (not violent, but shouting and arguing too much)
How does it work if we look to split up? she would keep the house, and can afford the payments and bills with help from family.
The house may have about £80k profit in it based on whats left on mortgage and a quick valuation on a property search.

How can i get a new house alone, so the children can stay when they want?
I have no savings as it all went on this current house.
can a single person realistically get a mortgage for a house?
Would the council help if i needed a property and had the kids stay with me?
I have no family to stay with so cant move back to parents etc.

marliepanda

Single people can get a mortgage if they have the income to support it.

Can your (ex) wife remortgage in her name on her income?

Can you afford a property on your income?

No the council is unlikely to house you, a single male, just because you may have kids stay occasionally. The kids have a home already. They don't need two.

Victor_the_Gink

If you have no savings, then you absolutely cannot afford another house. The council will not help you. They "prioritise" cases where children are homeless, in practice this means they will not help just adults - particularly as you will be deemed to have made yourself homeless.


You should start by rethinking your decision to hand over an asset worth thousands to your soon-to-be-ex. It's total insanity. If she wants to buy you out then she should, but you cannot just make yourself homeless.

The_Logans

Victor_the_Gink wrote: »

If you have no savings, then you absolutely cannot afford another house. The council will not help you. They "prioritise" cases where children are homeless, in practice this means they will not help just adults - particularly as you will be deemed to have made yourself homeless.


You should start by rethinking your decision to hand over an asset worth thousands to your soon-to-be-ex. It's total insanity. If she wants to buy you out then she should, but you cannot just make yourself homeless.

What he said. For the good of your children you need somewhere to live that they can come and stay and will be a second home to them. Their time with you will be no fun at all if you are homeless. You need to either sell your current house or get your partner to buy you out to enable you to move on. Some friends of mine have just gone through this. They were both gutted to lose the 'family home' but 6 months on they have both bought nice houses - a bit smaller and less grand than what they had together but the kids are happy and have a nice place to call home with both Mum and Dad. Good luck, I hope you work something out that suits all of you.

TBagpuss

You and your partner will need to reach an agreement about how you deal with the house.

First step is to clarify how you own the property (i.e. joint tenants, or tenants in common in equal or unequal shares)
Assuming you don't have a declaration of trust that says otherwise, the presumption is that you each own 50% of the house.

So normally the options would be:
1. The house is sold, the mortgage paid off, and you each have 50% of the net equity which you can then use as a deposit against a new property, if you can get a suitable property, or as a deposit to rent, if not.

2. If your partner is able to get a new mortgage in her sole name, she could get a mortgage which coves the existing mortgage + 50% of the net equity. The house is transferred into her sole name, her new mortgage is used to pay off the old mortgage and to pay you a lump sum, and you then use that money as a deposit.


On the face of it, it sounds as though you have about £40K each in equity. So one thing you should each be doing is looking into what you can each afford by way of a mortgage in your sole name, and what you might be able to buy with a £40K deposit and that new mortgage.

Because you are not married, a court doesn't have the option of deciding what happens based on needs or the children's interests, they have to look at the legal rights based on the deed or any other agreement between you.

As between the two of you, you would be free to agree something different. For instance, if you both agree that it is not in the children's interest s for the house to be sold now, you could agree on a different arrangement. In that case, it would be sensible to get a solicitor to draw up a formal separation agreement and deed of trust, which could set out in details things such as when, or in what circumstances, the house will be sold (or you bought out), who is responsible for maintenance, upkeep, insurance etc, how the sale proceeds will be divided etc.

There would be nothing to stop you coming to an agreement that your partner would remain in the house for now, if she can pay the mortgage, and if she is able to raise a lump sum to enable you to put a deposit down on rented accommodation, for instance, but you would need to come to an arrangement about how long that would be for. You might, for instance, come to an agreement that she could remain in the house for (say) 12 months, so that she could build up a record of paying the mortgage alone, and could make plans to either move or buy you out. you don't have to, but as a parent, it is not unreasonable for you to consider the effect of changes on your children as well as on you.

Another possibility of course would be if you can afford to take on the mortgage and buy her out.

amateur_house

Single people can get mortgages, I just have though with a fairly large deposit.
I am also moving out of the family home without selling (OH and grown up children who can't afford to leave home will live there hence unable to sell). Mortgage paid off on the house though.

If your partner can take over the mortgage on your current home you should be able to get a mortgage, though as others have said you will need to raise the money for at least a 5% deposit.

The council won't have a duty to house you as a single person, but some councils do have one bedroom flats available so it is still worth enquiring. My son's friend got one quite easily as a single person in his late 20s for no other reason than he wanted to move out of his parents house. This could be viewed as making himself intentionally homeless but didn't stop him getting a flat.

t3rm3y

she would buy me out, so i would have that as a deposit, but if i have the thinking right this would only be around £40k.
I could afford a mortgage (based on what i pay for the house at the moment) and the bills on my salary as these would be slightyl less as less is used if just me. its whether a bank would loan me what is require to get a new house, with £40,000 deposit i would have a good start, but i earn £22k per annum, i seem to recall that when we fist looked at housing a single person would only get 4 x their salary , so i would only have about £120k ish to get new place - houses are not this low in essex and surrounding areas (need to stay faily local to see children and for work)

t3rm3y

i couldnt afford to mortgage it alone AND buy her out, and she and the kids would need to find somewhere else, would rather she stayed with the kids in house and i moved out.

Cheeky_Monkey

You wouldn't have to buy a house. A 1 or 2 bed flat would be sufficient for your needs

Pixie5740

Is a split definitely on the cards? Have you tried relationship counselling? Even if a split is inevitable counselling can help sort out contact with the children, child support, and what happens to jointly owned assets such as the house in a controlled environment.

If at the end of it you can't afford to buy somewhere then you'll just need to rent privately like millions of others do.

Cheeky_Monkey

If you do want to buy don't forget that you will have to pay the extra 3% stamp duty as it will be your second property

Edit - sorry, forget that as you wouldn't have to pay stamp duty below £125k