We’d like to remind Forumites to please avoid political debate on the Forum.
This is to keep it a safe and useful space for MoneySaving discussions. Threads that are – or become – political in nature may be removed in line with the Forum’s rules. Thank you for your understanding.
PLEASE READ BEFORE POSTING: Hello Forumites! In order to help keep the Forum a useful, safe and friendly place for our users, discussions around non-MoneySaving matters are not permitted per the Forum rules. While we understand that mentioning house prices may sometimes be relevant to a user's specific MoneySaving situation, we ask that you please avoid veering into broad, general debates about the market, the economy and politics, as these can unfortunately lead to abusive or hateful behaviour. Threads that are found to have derailed into wider discussions may be removed. Users who repeatedly disregard this may have their Forum account banned. Please also avoid posting personally identifiable information, including links to your own online property listing which may reveal your address. Thank you for your understanding.
📨 Have you signed up to the Forum's new Email Digest yet? Get a selection of trending threads sent straight to your inbox daily, weekly or monthly!
House guest won't leave.
Comments
-
Ok, from a Social Worker point of view (I am one):
You give her 14 days written notice and advise her to go to the council with this. Assuming she does, she and her child will be placed in temporary accommodation for 28 days - they will not tell her this when she first goes, they will not offer this when she first goes, BUT when those 14 days are up, and you LITERALLY put her on the street, bags and all they will do it.
That 28 days will give them time to conclude whether she is now intentionally homeless (not your problem).
Should there be no temporary accommodation then they will likely put her in a B&B. If that in't possible then they will house the child in foster care, but as soon as mum has somewhere to stay they will give the child back. They will also not restrict access to said child.
What is your relationship with this woman? Is there, or has there been, a romantic or sexual relationship since she moved in? Even once? As this ill impact her rights a bit.0 -
I agree, give her 14 days written notice. Make sure that the letter states, explicitly, that she must leave no later than [date] (maybe 12 noon on 3rd April, which is 2 weeks tomorrow and means that the notice expires on a Monday when the housing office etc will be open) and you you will not, under any circumstances, be able to allow her to remain after that date.
Do not go with her to the housing office or speak to anyone on her behalf, and do not let her talk you in to offering to act as guarantor or to pay moving costs etc.
She may well try to convince you to let her stay, or try to make you feel guilty about telling her to leave. You have been more than generous in letting her stay and in supporting her financially. If she tries to guilt-trip you, remind her that she was only supposed to stay for a few weeks.
She should be provided with some help by the local council, this may well be in a B&B initially, and they won't provide it until she is physically homeless, so it is essential that you give her notice, and stick to it.All posts are my personal opinion, not formal advice Always get proper, professional advice (particularly about anything legal!)0 -
"Do not go with her to the housing office or speak to anyone on her behalf"
Why not? The natural feeling is to do anything to help the lady get rehoused. What's the downside?No reliance should be placed on the above! Absolutely none, do you hear?0 -
The fact she refuses to clear up would be it for me.
Change the locks dude and pretend to be out when she comes back leave a note on the door telling her to go to the council and collect her things at later date, will be painful when it all kicks off but best in the long run. Council probably have to find her emergeny housing.
I would also explain in the not why you have booted her out. Might stop her going crazy and damaging things.
Longer this goes on the harder it will get, and more rights she will have (probably) seeing as the laws are pretty messed up like that.0 -
Lord_Baltimore wrote: »I don't know, what is it that you think you might have misunderstood?
You seem to be suggesting that using hobnail boots to kick the !!!! out of your spouse is acceptable. If so, can I just say that I, for one, am totally disgusted by that.
Even as a joke, it's simply unacceptable on a public forum.No reliance should be placed on the above! Absolutely none, do you hear?0 -
You seem to be suggesting that using hobnail boots to kick the !!!! out of your spouse is acceptable. If so, can I just say that I, for one, am totally disgusted by that.
Even as a joke, it's simply unacceptable on a public forum.
I am totally disgusted by your presumptuousness and that you have had posts removed under false pretences.Mornië utulië0 -
"Do not go with her to the housing office or speak to anyone on her behalf"
Why not? The natural feeling is to do anything to help the lady get rehoused. What's the downside?
Because it make it less belioveable when she tells the hsing office that he is not her partner and that she is genuinely about to be thrown out. I agree that it is the natural thing to want tto help, which is why it is worth specifcally advising againsts it, as in this particualr situation it islikely to be counter-productive.
The same thing applies to agreeing to extend the deadline for her to leave.All posts are my personal opinion, not formal advice Always get proper, professional advice (particularly about anything legal!)0 -
You could tell her that the only way for her to get her own home is for you to ask her to leave and go to the council as homeless. This would show her that you aren't doing it to be mean but it's the only way and in her best interests. Then get her to gather her belongings and go to the council, either with the child or while the child is at school if old enough. The council will house them together in temporary accommodation until something more definite is available.0
-
Out of interest , what if they were in relationship or had sex since she moved in. It should not change anything I suppose as her legal status would be the same.The word "dilemma" comes from Greek where "di" means two and "lemma" means premise. Refers usually to difficult choice between two undesirable options.
Often people seem to use this word mistakenly where "quandary" would fit better.0 -
is she giving you 'favours' for staying there? I hope you used protection
You would be in a world of hurt if she got pregnant with your child. You think it's bad now..."It is prudent when shopping for something important, not to limit yourself to Pound land/Estate Agents"
G_M/ Bowlhead99 RIP0
This discussion has been closed.
Confirm your email address to Create Threads and Reply

Categories
- All Categories
- 352K Banking & Borrowing
- 253.5K Reduce Debt & Boost Income
- 454.2K Spending & Discounts
- 245K Work, Benefits & Business
- 600.6K Mortgages, Homes & Bills
- 177.4K Life & Family
- 258.8K Travel & Transport
- 1.5M Hobbies & Leisure
- 16.2K Discuss & Feedback
- 37.6K Read-Only Boards