Not told to register their coming wedding, now working abroad.

superboobs

My daughter and her partner, have been arranging their UK wedding for about a year. Everything is booked and paid for, costing thousands, because they are both now working abroad, and they wanted everything settled before they went. They still live in the UK, they have a house here, as they're returning in a few years, after their contracts are finished. So they are still UK residents, they just work abroad.
They are coming back to the UK, two weeks before the wedding, then going on honeymoon, and then back to the Caribbean, where they now work. The wedding is booked for September, in Church and obviously they have had meetings already with the Priest, but they weren't told at any time, that they have to register the marriage at the register office, in the district where they live, they only know about it now, because they've had an email from the Church. Plus they have to have been living in the district for 7 days, then wait four weeks to get married, in case there is anyone who objects to it, so that's a total of 5 weeks, before they can marry.
All this could have been done before they went abroad if they had known.
My daughter and partner are upset, angry, every emotion you can think of, she even had a go at me, asking me why I hadn't told her about this! I assumed it was something the Church did, after you'd booked the Church, it never even entered my head to ask her about it. I'm as confused as they are, I only know about the marriage banns, which I thought the Church took care of!
They've only been in their jobs three months, so have to save their holiday entitlement for the wedding, so they can't just come back to the UK between now and then, plus the cost of flights cost £2000 each time they come home.
It's a total !!!! up, she doesn't want anyone to know, so the only people who know up to now are just parents and step-parents. We're frantically trying to find information on-line, not a lot about, and not being allowed to discuss it with anyone else we're stuck!
Does anyone know anything about this please, and anyone have any ideas on what we can do?

esmy

Have you/they looked here?
https://www.gov.uk/marriages-civil-partnerships/overview

I'd also suggest that they contact the register office for advice.

onlyroz

I assume this isn't a C-of-E wedding? Surely, rather than scrabbling about online you should be making enquiries directly through the church? Either way, the legal obligations must be met for the marriage to be valid.

Gloomendoom

Why not have the church wedding and do the legal bit at the registry office later. No need to tell anybody else if they don't want to.

GlasweJen

This is a very serious mess up, every bridal forum and magazine I've picked up in the last 17 months has highlighted the need to get your registry office paperwork in order. The wedding can go ahead as planned but it would just be a blessing and there would be no legal marriage, probably not what your daughter wants to hear.

It usually needs to be the bride or groom to be that visits the registry office with the paperwork (passport, birth certificate and proof of address for each person). In exceptional circumstances someone else can do it but that would need to be agreed with a registrar beforehand and is usually reserved for a person being in hospital or terminally ill and unable to attend the office. I don't think a registrar would agree to a proxy registering a marriage when neither the bride nor groom are in the UK (and their passports won't be in the UK either).

The UK recognises marriages from any country, it might be easier to have a secret wedding in the carribean, just the legal side of it and then fly home and have a blessing disguised as a wedding in the church as planned. Chances are no one would notice.

barbarawright

Gloomendoom wrote: »

Why not have the church wedding and do the legal bit at the registry office later. No need to tell anybody else if they don't want to.

This seems the obvious solution. There is absolutely nothing they can do to get round the register office restrictions if they want a register office wedding. The seven days is actually nine days BTW as it doesn't include the first day at the address or the day they go to the office to give notice of intent. However they don't have to live in the district they have the register office ceremony in.

They also need to bear in mind that register offices do get booked up

Gloomendoom

GlasweJen wrote: »

The UK recognises marriages from any country, it might be easier to have a secret wedding in the carribean, just the legal side of it and then fly home and have a blessing disguised as a wedding in the church as planned. Chances are no one would notice.

It depends on the church concerned and where the wedding is taking place, but there may be no need to disguise anything. Just have the full religious ceremony.

theoretica

Would a special licence be a possibility?

Tuesday_Tenor

When you say you 'knew about the banns' that you thought the church took care of ....

Are they actually being married by banns, as though they were living at their home addresses?
It sounds as though they are not, and probably rightly, as they are not actually resident in the parish at the right time. So they need the Superintendent's Certification process, as you describe: resident 7 days plus 28 days for people to object.

What a muddle. If the church knew they were going to be living away, they should have made the process clear. But if the couple didn't tell the church they would be abroad, then how would the church know to do anything out of their normal schedule of e-mail reminder?

A quick google has shown that a Special Licence from the Archbishop of Canterbury is 'possible' as an alternative, cost £250. However, as there IS still time for them to come home for a week, then allow the notice period, however costly and inconvenient and potentially job-threatening, then I don't see why the Archbishop would be inclined to use this discretionary power.

https://www.yourchurchwedding.org/article/special-licences/

They need to talk with the Church. If the Church does admit some responsibility then they might support the Special Licence application, rather than risk being sued by the couple for the losses incurred by the extra air travel etc.

However, if it's clear the couple HAD the correct information (and I find it hard to believe it wasn't in the standard paperwork) but just didn't read it, then they will just have do the extra trips and bear the losses themselves.

Good luck

TBagpuss

They could enquire about a Special Licence, or alternatively speak to the clergyman/woman at the church about whether they could either perform the ceremony or perform a blessing, so that they could have the wedding later . I suspect that the vicar will be unable to use the full marriage service if they are not actually eligible to marry (it's easier the other way round, if the marriage has already taken place legally, but a church ceremony is wanted)

Have they double checked with the church they they need a superintdent's certificate rather than banns?
If they are both UK citizens and are still domiciled here then they may be able to get married by banns. assuming that they, or one of them, has a connection to the church where they plan to marry.

I would suggest they start by contacting the church for assistance - all other considerations aside, if they do apply for a Special Licence they will need a letter from the vicar.

TBagpuss

Another option would be to get married where they are, and have the church ceremony as a blessing.