Tribunal Appeal Refused

[Deleted User]

I have struggled with mental health and I know its not what you want but I had enough help from MIND to keep me going when I felt terribly depressed and suicidal. There is a fee but it might be low enough for you to pay. I know you feel terrible, I know you want to end the suffering, but there is also something in you that is trying to survive. There are other more positive ways to relieve the suffering, there really are.

Just talking things through helped.., and I really really did want to kill myself a few times. Sometimes I've got through by just gritting my teeth and hanging on (I do have children, that can help, that can make you feel more of a failure). Sometimes its just my damned stubborness that keeps me going lol (and me saying loudly to the world a swear word followed closely by .., you, I'm going to keep going). And with every little success, I do feel better. For a while and those 'whiles' are getting longer. Quite often when life has thrown another bag of crap at you, just getting through is a big success. That is what makes you a survivor and proud even if you aren't feeling that right now, if you look it will be there, because you are. I have been there with my father and his disappointed, hurt look. That's what I saw but what was really there was concern and love. I just couldn't see it at the time because I felt such a failure.

I know Mind counselling is not what you really need, but it might be enough to help you keep going.

I was referred to the Royal Maudsley for some mental health counselling. Fantastic, waited two years for it. Its only for 20 sessions, now I am being referred back to CMH team again even though I told the RM they'd had me in for three assessments and three times lost all record of the assessment so it led no where lol. It did help some, but not as much as I had thought. I know I need more, but will have to find it. And I will.

Mental Health services in this country are abysmal, but please don't let that defeat you, just focus on finding a way to keep going. Sometimes its just a sort of anger at the unfairness of various systems and judgements that has kept me going, and 'I'm not going to let the world make me go'.

Well done for going through the PIP process again. I know there isn't enough help with Tribunals. I was lucky, my Tribunal was successful. But I still can't quite believe it.

Have you tried any online help resources such as https://www.bipolaruk.org/

I hope you will see the compassion and pride in what I am writing. From someone who has been there. It sounds a bit soft, but please, give yourself a hug. You deserve it.

Missy-D1956

I was feeling mad