Ex refuses to discuss the marital home!

JAS2015

My brother split with his wife last March. They jointly own two properties...one was the family home, the second was a smaller property that they rented out. She has remained in the family home with their two children and he has moved into the rental property. She earns more than him. Currently she is paying mortgage and all bills on the marital home and he is doing the same on the second property and also paying her child maintenance. All along she has said she doesn't want to move and will get her own mortgage.

My brother is keen to move on with his life and wants to get divorced and sell the second property. However, he has been told by a financial advisor that because his name will still be on the family home mortgage, he won't be able to buy his own home. He wants to sell the second home, give his ex £15k equity from it (they have agreed this figure previously), cut all financial ties by removing himself from the mortgage of the family home and move on. However, now it's come to it, she is refusing to even discuss it! We think this is because she realises that she wouldn't get a mortgage to cover this and it's become apparent that she is relying on credit cards to live so racking up debt.

My brother simply does not earn enough to pay the mortgage (or even 50% of it) on the family home plus rent/buy a place of his own and pay maintenance . He has his children at least 3 nights a week so he can't just move into a 1 bed flat either to reduce costs. She refuses to even discuss options with him. I have tried also but to no avail. He wants to avoid solicitors and it turning bitter but where does he stand?

mgdavid

It takes two to avoid solicitors. If one will and the other wont then a solicitor is unavoidable - and very necessary.

anna_1977

I think in the case of large financial transactions (which this would be) a solicitor MUST be involved - to refrain from any comeback down the line. It would be worth spending the money to get a watertight deal

Rachel83

If she can cover the cost of the mortgage on her own and pay the bills then she is entitled to reside in the family home until the children are 18 or leave full time education. He needs to do some reading then contact a solicitor.

AndyBSG

Your brother is going to need a solicitor no matter which way you look at it.

Of course, a solicitor appointed just to draft the terms of a mutual agreement they have both already discussed and settled on just to make sure it's all watertight is going to be a LOT cheaper than a solicitor appointed to try and force the sale of a house.

If your brother and his wife can't agree then the only other real option is for him to force the sale of the house which will cost a fortune in solicitors fees and be a very long, drawn out process. Also, if the children are under 16 then it won't even really be an option.

Also, how are they linked on the mortgage? Whether they are Joint Tenants or Tenants in Common makes a different to how easy that would be.

Also, you say your brother is paying child maintenance? If he is not paying it through the Child Support Agency then he needs to make sure that what he is paying is well documented with a paper trail in case she comes after him at a later date for CSA payments.

davidwood123

If he's having the children around 50% of the time he should be paying very little, if any, child maintenance.

JAS2015

Thanks for the responses so far.

She currently is paying the mortgage and bills but using credit cards to do so. Long term this isn't sustainable. My brother is concerned that he will be liable for this debt. He understands the situation about the children staying in the home until 16 but does his name have to stay on the mortgage to do so? How is it possible for him to buy his own home if this is the case? As he has the children 50% of the time, he wants to be able to offer them a stable home too for the time they are with him.

I see that a solicitor now is unavoidable. Thanks all

Pollycat

Rachel83 wrote: »

If she can cover the cost of the mortgage on her own and pay the bills then she is entitled to reside in the family home until the children are 18 or leave full time education. He needs to do some reading then contact a solicitor.

That's not what my friend's solicitor told her (approx 5 yesrs ago).

I asked this question point blank:
"Can he force her to sell the house?"
She said yes he can.
Her kids were 12 and 8 years old.

AND he made her sell it as he wanted his share.

Rileybaby

The children staying in the family home until 16/18 is now a thing of the past. The children need a home with both parents. If she can't buy him out (the court are likely to give her a period of time to agree a mortgage etc) then the house will have to be sold.

Spendless

Pollycat wrote: »

That's not what my friend's solicitor told her (approx 5 yesrs ago).

I asked this question point blank:
"Can he force her to sell the house?"
She said yes he can.
Her kids were 12 and 8 years old.

AND he made her sell it as he wanted his share.

I suspect that is because there isn't a 'one size fits all' answer. It would depend on the financial situation (and earning power) of the parties involved, the equity in the house and so on.

Some of my friends who've divorced and have been the lower earner and Primary childcare provider, have been able to stay in the marital home until they re-marry/co-habit or the child/ren reach 18 (or more specifically the end of non advanced education ie A levels or equivalent) and then the house has had to be sold at that point and the NRP has been given their share. I am aware of cases where the exes name hasn't been taken off the mortgage because the one staying behind hasn't earnt enough to take the mortgage on alone.

A solicitor will need consulting.

kazwookie

Is your brother's name on the credit cards? if the wife is busy spending on this, he will be liabile for the payments onthse if she doesn't make them.