£67,031.92 is a frightening number indeed....

System

Thank you for your get well wishes, much appreciated.

All seems to be running smoothly in your world TOPM , can not believe you have been hear nearly a year , so much has changed in your way of thinking.

I do hope you get some ideas for making your bedrooms bigger , my DD has just divided her master bedroom into 2 for the DGC . They now have 3 bedrooms 2 doubles and a single. They did this as they could not afford a 3 bedroomed house in the area they live so was easier to divide. It looks good and has been done properly. Can you divide your master easily or is it to small or not the right shape ?

JoJoC

enthusiasticsaver wrote: »

I think, do I want this or need it. Where will it go, how often will I use it and can I get something better for that price?

Oh how I wish I was a bit more like this. Both my husband and I are/ were impulsive shoppers/ spenders and that's a dangerous combination! We combat that now by just NOT GOING shopping...and my 2 and 4 year old boys are delighted with that! :rotfl:

Treadingonplaymobil

enthusiasticsaver wrote: »

I think your attitude has changed and good you did not waste money on buying stuff just for the sake of it. Maybe your friend could afford it but buying stuff saying that will do sounds like it will end up in landfill or the charity shop in 6 months time. At least you only buy stuff you love.

I think I must have saved a fortune in both time and money over the years by overthinking purchases. I am not an impulsive shopper at all. I think, do I want this or need it. Where will it go, how often will I use it and can I get something better for that price? Only exception is clothes. I tend to go twice a year and if it fits, is the right colour and style and looks good then I will buy it. No trawling round numerous shops trying stuff on. Still planned trips though.

I have always overthought in the 'do I love it?' sense, but it would be fair to say that the 'can I afford it?' part of that internal conversation has been a fairly recent addition .

Cumbria_lass wrote: »

Thank you for your get well wishes, much appreciated.

All seems to be running smoothly in your world TOPM , can not believe you have been hear nearly a year , so much has changed in your way of thinking.

I do hope you get some ideas for making your bedrooms bigger , my DD has just divided her master bedroom into 2 for the DGC . They now have 3 bedrooms 2 doubles and a single. They did this as they could not afford a 3 bedroomed house in the area they live so was easier to divide. It looks good and has been done properly. Can you divide your master easily or is it to small or not the right shape ?

I know, almost exactly a year! It's gone so fast in some ways and so slow in others.

The big plans is that master will be divided into two - DH and I will have the bigger portion, one of the DCs the small bit - but also that we will gain a room with the dormer, as there is a bit of eaves space that just couldn't become a room without the dormer.

JoJoC wrote: »

Oh how I wish I was a bit more like this. Both my husband and I are/ were impulsive shoppers/ spenders and that's a dangerous combination! We combat that now by just NOT GOING shopping...and my 2 and 4 year old boys are delighted with that! :rotfl:

My husband is an impulsive spender too. I've never been one, I just stay in denial for longer so I have well considered expensive purchases that I can't afford! My DC actually hugged DH on the weekend when he said they didn't have to go food shopping with him - they hate going shopping too!

PositiveBalance

Well done, ToPM - you've clearly had a mindset shift about (clothes) shopping. It's a revelation once you realised it has happened, isn't it?

I think I also appreciate the things I do buy more, now, than I did before, too.

And I think the less going to a landfill site will appeal to your hippyish side, too!

Treadingonplaymobil

DH is away tonight and tomorrow. I've got much better at being gentle with my expectations of myself while he's away. DC are all in bed and I'm just drinking a cup of tea before heading up for a ridiculously early night with my kindle. I used to try to achieve just as much while he was away as while he was here, and actually it's pointless - one of the DCs always needs me for something, or plans somehow go awry, so there's no point aiming for the stars while he's not here to help out.

I do have to say I'm really enjoying this slow and quiet week. The house is so much nicer to be in since I've spent a bit of time each day cleaning, I've been able to get a bit ahead with my contract work, and I'm slooowwwly picking up the social media again for my new website.

I really need to make the effort to be consciously slow as often as I can, it make so much difference to my parenting, my tolerance of poor DH and my attitude to life, the universe and the debt. Sometimes I feel like I can't risk slowing down mentally in case I stop earning and the whole house of cards collapses, but I also feel like I can't afford to keep up with that 'fast' mentality and I need to be slower even if it means the debt situation goes all wrong. The reality is somewhere in the middle I suppose - sometimes my headspace and life needs to be fast, sometimes slow. The key for me is to make sure the slow bit happens regularly enough, so I don't get too frazzled and overwhelmed and lose all the benefits of the lifestyle we have chosen and have sacrificed so much (financial security!) to achieve.

Made budget bean burgers for dinner. I didn't think it looked like a lot of mixture initially, but ended up having to bulk it out with porridge oats as it was quite wet, and now have four small burgers leftover for the DCs dinner another night, so I'm calling that a win. The burgers were pretty good, especially for the price (essentially a tin of beans, a carrot and an onion). I added a little smoked paprika to give them extra flavour as well as the cumin the recipe called for. Was planning frozen french fries, but did hm potato wedges to go with them, using up some sad potatoes from the bottom of the fridge that weren't going to last much longer instead, which felt pleasingly MS.

Ooh, and I found the two big reusable growbags today, which I'm pleased about. So need to start planning and planting the edibles for this year.

Savings/Spends:
- £16.48/£28 February 'rounding down' overpayment pot
- £1,046.80/£5,000 2018 debt repayment goal.
- £30.93 on bulk cleaning supplies - vinegar, bicarb, and a couple of aesthetically pleasing spray bottles (of course!). I'm going back to natural cleaners in an effort to ditch the pricey natural cleaners like Method (most chemically brands cause me an allergic reaction). Hopefully this batch of supplies should last freaking months, more or less until the end of the year.
- £17.04 on new charger and battery for camera (from my business account).

To do today
1. Continue to get ahead on contract work. Done.
2. See if I can get the digital camera my sister gave me to work. Have ordered a new battery and charger, as I think the problem is the battery not charging rather than a fault with the camera.
3. Social media for work. A tiny bit done. Would like to spend a bit more time on this tomorrow and actually get ahead.
4. Give the dining room a proper clean - I tidied it yesterday so just cleaning to do. Done. So much nicer to be in now!
5. Make veggie burgers for dinner. Done.
6. Make flapjacks for snacks. Done.

To do this week
1. More decluttering - particularly the lego! DONE DONE DONE.
2. Finish planning any handmade gifts for birthdays/Christmas 2018 so I can ensure they are done well in advance. Done.
3. Arrange a refund for a cancelled swimming lesson of DC2's. Done!

To do in February
1. Restart social media for my website, which has really been on the back burner so far this year. Making a start.
2. Eat the contents of the freezer and defrost it. Ongoing, doesn't feel like we've made much of a dent yet!
3. Play around with designs to discuss with the architect in early March.
4. Have a laid back half term with the DC, doing activities at home, walks and crafts. Too many busy weeks recently.
5. SLOW DOWN. This started well at the beginning of the year, but has fallen by the wayside. I have a couple of fractionally less busy weeks coming up, must make a real effort not to fill them with All The Things. This is going really well.

Treadingonplaymobil

Week 52: Day 5


Morning! Another day of flying solo with the DCs, hope I can end it feeling as zen as I did yesterday. <awaits imminent A&E visit or similar>

Last day of childcare of the week, and I also need to start thinking about packing to go to my dad's tomorrow, so can't take it too slow today, but I'm hoping to find time to make a bit of a start on some of this year's handmade gifts - going through all my crafty supplies on the weekend really reminded me that I have a lot that I can use up to make some 'free' gifts for people (ie I bought the yarn or fabric so long ago I've forgotten!).

Have to lug all three DC to DC1's swim club tonight, which is tedious, but at least I'll have the car as DH has a hire car through work for his trip this week.

Savings/Spends:
- £17.17/£28 February 'rounding down' overpayment pot
- £1,046.80/£5,000 2018 debt repayment goal.

To do today
1. Finish tidying and cleaning DCs' room.
2. Drop of donated fabric to friend for local children's centre.
3. Make a start on some knitting/sewing for handmade gifts this year.
4. Make pasta sauce for dinner tonight (and check we have pasta! I have no recollection of seeing any in the cupboard). Check for any frozen leftover bits of tomato sauce, olives etc that can be chucked in.

To do this week
1. More decluttering - particularly the lego! DONE DONE DONE.
2. Finish planning any handmade gifts for birthdays/Christmas 2018 so I can ensure they are done well in advance. Done.
3. Arrange a refund for a cancelled swimming lesson of DC2's. Done!

To do in February
1. Restart social media for my website, which has really been on the back burner so far this year. Making a start.
2. Eat the contents of the freezer and defrost it. Ongoing, doesn't feel like we've made much of a dent yet!
3. Play around with designs to discuss with the architect in early March.
4. Have a laid back half term with the DC, doing activities at home, walks and crafts. Too many busy weeks recently.
5. SLOW DOWN. This started well at the beginning of the year, but has fallen by the wayside. I have a couple of fractionally less busy weeks coming up, must make a real effort not to fill them with All The Things. This is going really well.

Cherryfudge

Your savings/spends slot is looking very healthy! Well done

I think there must be some bug going round that makes everyone want to eat all the stuff in their freezer. Did I see you on XSpender's thread about it? I think I might have to chuck out a few items to get through mine.

Honeybug

Hope the day went well.

Paradoxically, I find when I slow down I actually seem to get more done. Certainly never less. One of life's many mysteries!

Treadingonplaymobil

Week 52: Day 6


Whoops, forgot to come back and update my lists yesterday. I got everything done, anyway!

Cherryfudge I'm not on XSpender's freezer thread, but I did see that several people are doing similar. Ours is mostly because the freezer needs defrosting, rather than anything else, but it's a good habit to be in I think, otherwise things end up lurking for years! I definitely have frozen fruit in there from last summer.

Honeybug I am finding exactly the same - I am getting at least as much done when I slow down, certainly of the important stuff. It's really improving my life.

Two bits of good news yesterday. First is that DH found a £10 cheque from Christmas for us that he paid in, so that's an extra tenner towards my dad's birthday meal (between that and top cashback, I am up to £20 already), and second is that he's getting a small bonus from work. This hasn't happened since the first year he worked there more than half a decade ago and everyone got £100 in Sainsburys vouchers. He doesn't know how much it will be yet, all the information he has from his boss is 'more than £100, less than £1,000', and the amount won't be confirmed until the end of March. Totally unhelpful, but I will be excited whatever it is - we can split it between a couple of pots, including making a debt overpayment.

Ooh, and another good thing this morning - I made a good sale in my smaller business overnight, and am now only £30 away from having May's salary covered, which will mean I am three months ahead. I really want it covered in the first half of the month, and am waiting on payment from a client for work later in this month which will cover it, as I am aware that as soon as we hit March I need to start thinking about June, if I want to stay three months ahead! Would really love to start siphoning off some money into debt overpayment, but can't risk the no income for four months situation of last year so need to keep focusing on this buffer first.

I have been reading a few diaries recently where the writers seem to manage regular significant overpayments from jiggling their budgets - £20 here, £10 there, most days - and am feeling a bit woeful that that isn't going to happen with out budget, as there just isn't that much flex in them.

Busy day today - need to get dinner (sausage rolls) made and as much as possible packed before lunchtime so DH can load the car while I pop over to a friend's house this afternoon for a cup of tea and a catch up (the only time we could do for weeks). And I have DC3 to look after, so need to actually engage with her at some stage too.

The DCs are all really pleased with their new tidy room, and even said thank you unprompted to me for tidying it! So much easier for them to play when it's like that, and I've set a calendar reminder in a few weeks to swap round some of the toys, as I've put some away in a cupboard (not many, as we don't have much cupboard space).

Savings/Spends:
- £18.97/£28 February 'rounding down' overpayment pot
- £1,046.80/£5,000 2018 debt repayment goal.

To do today
1. Message a friend to plan a playdate in half term.
2. Write packing list.
3. Pack for my dad's.
4. Make sausage rolls (must get the sausagemeat and pastry out of the freezer as soon as I post this!).

To do this week
1. More decluttering - particularly the lego! DONE DONE DONE.
2. Finish planning any handmade gifts for birthdays/Christmas 2018 so I can ensure they are done well in advance. Done.
3. Arrange a refund for a cancelled swimming lesson of DC2's. Done!

To do in February
1. Restart social media for my website, which has really been on the back burner so far this year. Making a start.
2. Eat the contents of the freezer and defrost it. Ongoing, doesn't feel like we've made much of a dent yet!
3. Play around with designs to discuss with the architect in early March.
4. Have a laid back half term with the DC, doing activities at home, walks and crafts. Too many busy weeks recently.
5. SLOW DOWN. This started well at the beginning of the year, but has fallen by the wayside. I have a couple of fractionally less busy weeks coming up, must make a real effort not to fill them with All The Things. This is going really well.

Treadingonplaymobil

Unexpected frugal wins already today:

- baked a mincemeat cake in a fit of efficiency, so we have something to eat in the car for pudding/traffic jam emergencies.
- similar vein - I knew the DCs would want a substantial snack after school, and was planning a quick supermarket trip for something, but remembered the savoury muffins I made for lunches and have in the freezer. Half term next week, so plenty of time to make more. Really good recipe, incidentally. I am properly impressed with how tasty they are. Plus some leftover fruit from the week, which won’t last until we’re back.
- Taking a jar of marmalade, made the other day, as a gift for my step mother, instead of flowers. She isn’t really a flowers person (and is very much a marmalade person), so this is a double win!

Winner winner chicken dinner.