£67,031.92 is a frightening number indeed....

armchairexpert

The architect is great news, I think. Well done on saying no to the loan - that must be tempting but you're right not to, of course. But this gives you a nice realistic mid-term goal to aim for, and it's great to know that you don't have to do a huge expensive second storey extension to achieve it.

(I had a builder round the other day to quote me on a couple of similar improvements: in my case I need a couple of rooms knocking through, in two separate places (so four small rooms into two bigger ones) and the second I had him in I remembered all the other things I wanted done. So tempting! He didn't help, either, with his casual mentioning of how lovely our vintage windows would be if the frames were restored and did I know he also retrofits double glazing GAH. Anyway, I hear you!)

Treadingonplaymobil

Week 21: Day 6

Busy day today (gosh, what a total change). Committed ages ago to meeting a friend today in a nearby city, and I could really do without it - not that I don't want to meet up (I do!), just so busy with deadlines and work. I'm going to have to email someone and explain I can't make a (self imposed) deadline today, it's going to be Monday morning instead, which is a real embarrassment. They won't be cross, but I feel bad about it. I badly under-estimated how much time a very drudgey piece of work would take.

Will be rushing around making a picnic lunch this morning. Not quite sure what it will contain, but we definitely have plenty of food in the house, so I'm hoping to limit what I buy to train fare and a cup of tea (and attempt not to spend a tenner in a cafe making that cup of tea happen. I really must buy a thermos mug).

Apart from current manic deadline work, I am very quiet this month - have no client bookings at all, which is not ideal as it's my most profitable work. Over the years I've been doing this I've found that very little I do affects business levels in the summer, it is always very quiet. My contract work (current manic deadline) will top up August's salary pot and most of September's too though, so as long as some more work ticks in by late September I'll be fine, but I'd feel happier if I was building my business account cushion again. Also I currently only have enough spare this month to buy new camping beds (the only absolutely essential piece of camping kit, although there are also a couple of essential bits of clothing, like walking boots for DH, me and DC2, and waterproofs for at least one child and I would be happier if I could resolve that this month too).

Oh, just remembered, DH found out yesterday that his pay rise will appear in this month's pay packet, and will be back dated to June, so there will be an extra £100ish, which will cover his walking boots (his previous pair lasted 12 years, so I am not going to make him buy a cheap £30 pair as he definitely gets good cost per wear from them!). So only mine and DC2's to find money for.

Gosh this is long. One last thing: DH was very much in agreement with my plan to save in advance for each bit of progress with extension planning (until remortgaging for the actual build at some stage), which I was pleased with as I know he would really rather dive in and get it done. The only slight concern is if rates suddenly go up, but I know family member will lend to us instead if we want (though I find this idea much more stressful than the mortgage!). Anyway, a problem for another day - getting the debt level down a little is priority 1, then saving a fund for expenses as we continue to reduce debt.

It is all feeling like a very long slog at the moment (not that there is any alternative, which makes it easier in a way). Our debt, as we have often discussed here, is not a 'one year of mega frugal living and it will be over' one. Even if we cut back to the absolute bones it would be well over a five year job, and that would mean comrpomising our children's childhood more than we're prepared to. This constant balance of trying to still have a life while drilling down the debt is a tricky one, because we can't just go 'right, no luxuries or house work or anything at all fun until this debt is gone'. Every single spend has to be weighed up on its own merits of value/positive effect on our family vs impact on debt repayment.

to do today
1. Make packed lunch AND SNACKS (my usual spending downfall when out with DC3).
2. Pare down the camping shopping list and research prices/cashback.
3. Continue with contract work.
4. Do some social media, for both businesses.

to do this week
1. Buy a washing up bowl!!! (bets on whether it happens?!).
2. Order camping gear needed.
3. Clean the house thoroughly one room at a time. One room done. Does that count?
4. scribble out some plans for the architect to look at (don't panic, I'm not commissioning him for any work for the near future!). Done, he's coming tomorrow.

Aims for July:
1. Pay some extra off the MBNA card - I'd like this card gone asap.
2. Pay for camping holiday commitments out of self employed income rather than adding to debt (it will mean not growing the cushion much more, but that can take precedence in September).
3. Stick to the budget even more closely than in June!

warby68

Sounds like you are 'grimly determined' at the moment - I'm hoping a month of grim determination will turn into, hey look what we've achieved and lived to tell the tale this month?

Waterproofs - when my sons were small (and growing every time I turned round) I bought a few bits off Ebay such as this - Things that are quite vital but not actually worn many times mean you get nearly new brand names at low prices. It might still be the same. The outdoor shops are in sale mode as well (wet summer?) based on the mailers we're getting - they seem to think we camp every week rather than once in a true blue moon lol

I think you need to meet your friend - you've sounded a bit low this week and moving the work deadline seems very much like the lesser of the evils.

I won't bang on about the architect/extension as your plan to go very cautiously even sounds reasonable to me., yes me! I just wonder whether you have scope to look at increasing your income to achieve your aims - I know you're dedicated to your business but once you have more childcare I wonder if a paid regular job for a short while with business on the back burner would actually be worthwhile, if not what you really want. Short term pain, long term gain etc

As far as debt being a long term slog, it looks as if you have potential for things to ease within a year or two from increased income anyway - try and keep that in sight as your aim - battening down the hatches completely but just until then and have a review.

Finally (as I do go on and have to go to work), I know you're extremely time poor but do you do income boosting via surveys and such like. Over the years I've had less time (and also got very bored to be frank) but I do still use Prolific Academic - even my average of £40 a month would be useful to you and I've just had a record £140 month.

Honeysucklelou2

Have you tried an agricultural shop for waterproofs and boots? I picked up a pair of waterproof over trousers for my DD last year for £5 which I thought was reasonable.

The food budget is my sticking point too and I struggle to keep it low. I'm averaging £550-£600 a month for 9 of us. We rarely have meat but spend quite a bit on dairy. You mentioned fruit and veg...i tend to stick to a basic apples, oranges and bananas fruit list plus whatever else is on offer then buy frozen fruit as that works out cheaper. I have found referring to old cookbooks useful as I've been able to find a few frugal yet filling recipes.

Well done on all you've achieved so far.

Treadingonplaymobil

Grimly determined sums it up nicely! Or maybe just resigned. I think having no option (ie we cannot take on more debt and be able to afford repayments) helps enormously, as there is no internal debate to be had.

Increasing income - hell yes. I have given myself until next spring to up my income with my self employed work and if at that stage it isn't looking good then it's going to be time to start looking at REAL jobs. However, I suspect that unless I found a school hours, term time only job, it would be difficult for me to earn significantly more than I currently do (have been self employed for 8 years, so a long time out of job market), so as long as I can up my income by £50-100 per month by next spring, with some likelihood of it growing further when DC3 is at full time school in Sept '18, I'll stick with what I do.

Surveys are an interesting one - I signed up to a couple of sites back in February, but really struggled to make time to do them as I tend to use my spare time for self employed work. Might be worth focusing on over the summer though, when it's hard for me to do any 'proper' work while looking after the 3DC, but there's often the off spare 10 minutes to check for a survey.

I think (as someone mentioned a few days back) one of the areas I also need to crack down on is using the safety net of my additional self employed income to allow us to break our budget constantly. Even though I have made a budget that balances with my bare minimum income (around £150), we consistently overshoot that by £3-400 per month because the money is available in my business account so it's easy to transfer and spend it.

I wonder if, with my total absence of willpower, I would be better keeping literally just one month's business expenses and salary as a cushion and just immediately dividing any extra profit at all 70/30 between the debt and having extra in the current month. It is almost unthinkable that I could have a month without earning anything at all (as I have regular work which nets me a minimum of £150 and a maximum of £450 a month, depending on how the weeks fall) and if I had six months of throwing a couple of hundred extra at the debt every single month, we would virtually able to manage on just DH's salary in an emergency as the minimum repayments would be that much lower. I know that it's counter to standard small business advice, but I think we've established that my willpower is, erm, lower than the average small business owner.

Whatever solution I find needs to be simple above all else - I am already spending a disproportionate amount of time balancing budgets (partly because of the overspending) and I can't afford to spend lots more time on it.

Edited to add: interestingly, I have no trouble leaving alone the pots that are reserved for specific purposes (a new tablet for work, savings for the architect, a new bike for DS1) but struggle to leave alone pots that are more general ('Christmas', 'car repairs' etc. I think it's similar to the weekly budgets working - I can see an immediate effect when I withdraw money from 'DS1's bike' fund, but when it's 'Christmas' I just tell myself that I can make cut backs or rejig things).

arsenalbarnie

Hi There I thought I would add my tuppence worth to try and cheer you along. Am a regular reader of your diary. I don't know how you do it all, you're amazing. As for your OH it sounds like you have a diamond there. Mine would never have taken ours camping on his own. (We have got 5 mind).

As to worrying about the kids - don't. It sounds as though they have a great time. Camping, days out at weekends, trips to the beach and a hands on father. All sounds pretty idyllic to me. Most children at their age just want their parents around them doing fun stuff. At least they aren't cooped up in their bedroom in front of the telly like a lot of kids are. We had many camping holidays with ours and they loved it mainly! Fishing, swimming, crabbing etc. Took my daughter and 5 of her friends last year after gcse's and all they wanted to do was go crabbing under the railway bridge! Even at 16. They all said they wished they had done it as children. One summer holiday they slept in the small pup tent in the garden every night for 6 weeks! We couldn't afford to go away so made it fun by cooking outside etc. We had to move the tent round to keep the grass alive so my OH came up with different 'pitches' one being good as it was by the tap, another was premium as next to the water feature and the third was by the petting zoo, i.e. Next to the rabbit hutch😀 They still talk about that summer now and my eldest is 26.

I could ramble on about the money saving but will save that. Try and spend as much time as you can with your kids as before you know it they have grown up and you will wonder where the time went.

Keep up the great job it sounds you both do as parents, all that healthy cooking you do and making little changes to your spending which will all become second nature the longer you keep at it. Have a great weekend :T

Treadingonplaymobil

arsenalbarnie wrote: »

Hi There I thought I would add my tuppence worth to try and cheer you along. Am a regular reader of your diary. I don't know how you do it all, you're amazing. As for your OH it sounds like you have a diamond there. Mine would never have taken ours camping on his own. (We have got 5 mind).

As to worrying about the kids - don't. It sounds as though they have a great time. Camping, days out at weekends, trips to the beach and a hands on father. All sounds pretty idyllic to me. Most children at their age just want their parents around them doing fun stuff. At least they aren't cooped up in their bedroom in front of the telly like a lot of kids are. We had many camping holidays with ours and they loved it mainly! Fishing, swimming, crabbing etc. Took my daughter and 5 of her friends last year after gcse's and all they wanted to do was go crabbing under the railway bridge! Even at 16. They all said they wished they had done it as children. One summer holiday they slept in the small pup tent in the garden every night for 6 weeks! We couldn't afford to go away so made it fun by cooking outside etc. We had to move the tent round to keep the grass alive so my OH came up with different 'pitches' one being good as it was by the tap, another was premium as next to the water feature and the third was by the petting zoo, i.e. Next to the rabbit hutch😀 They still talk about that summer now and my eldest is 26.

I could ramble on about the money saving but will save that. Try and spend as much time as you can with your kids as before you know it they have grown up and you will wonder where the time went.

Keep up the great job it sounds you both do as parents, all that healthy cooking you do and making little changes to your spending which will all become second nature the longer you keep at it. Have a great weekend :T

Thank you so much for the positive post! DH does pretty well - he was thrown into the deep end early as I have always worked evenings and weekends. Also :eek: at five children. I would be considering getting dressed an enormous achievement!

Treadingonplaymobil

Week 21: Day 7

Woohoo, made it to the weekend! Still working, but knowing I have two clear days to get my final bits of work done before Monday makes things a little more relaxed.

Managed to keep my spends down to only about a tenner while out yesterday - £6.50 on train ticket and £3.90 on some tomatoes and biscuits to go with our lunch. I was rather impressed with my non-cafe situation.

I am also into week 2 of my weekly budgeting pots, which is good. We overspent in week 1 again, but not as badly as last month. Inch by inch, we improve!

The more I think about it, the more I am inclined to go with my idea yesterday of just throwing anything extra at the debt for a few months, rather than building up a cushion that I inevitably fritter away five minutes later. I know it puts us in an insecure position, but it's less insecure than the current one of spending the cushion, rather than using it to attack the debt. I'm also thinking of further splitting some of those budget pots that I keep tapping (Christmas, car maintenance, holidays etc) so that they are for more definite things (e.g. Christmas divided by person, a category for food, a category for extra activities etc) so I can see very clearly what I'm doing to my budget pots if I snafffle money from them. Most of my budgeting seems to be about counter-acting my amazing ability to persuade myself that whatever I want to spend on right now is the most crucial thing ever and I can manage the fall out later. Slightly embarrassing, but I'd rather accept the way I am and plan for it than pretend I am suddenly going to get a responsible head on and go 'oh yes, better not spend any money.'

I've had one small client enquiry - it will only be c.£70 for a couple of hours, but I am not looking that particular gift horse in the mouth! Fingers crossed it comes off.

to do today
1. Make packed lunch for DS1 who is off to a day for gifted primary pupils at the local uni.
2. Pare down the camping shopping list and research prices/cashback.
3. Continue with contract work.
4. Do some social media, for both businesses.
5 Tidy up a load of follow up emails and messages that have come in this week and been pushed to the back burner while I was in deadline hell.
6. Think about teacher presents - there are absolutely loads of teachers and TAs, and the DSs always want to do presents for them all. Any ideas?
7. menu plan and my supermarket - we have friends over for lunch tomorrow so need to do food shopping today. Am holding onto my receipts this month and am going to look back when I have a few weeks-worth and see where my key overspends are, to decide whether I just need to up my budget or if there are any more reasonable cuts.

to do this week
1. Buy a washing up bowl!!! (bets on whether it happens?!).
2. Order camping gear needed.
3. Clean the house thoroughly one room at a time. One room done. Does that count?
4. scribble out some plans for the architect to look at (don't panic, I'm not commissioning him for any work for the near future!). Done.

Aims for July:
1. Pay some extra off the MBNA card - I'd like this card gone asap.
2. Pay for camping holiday commitments out of self employed income rather than adding to debt (it will mean not growing the cushion much more, but that can take precedence in September).
3. Stick to the budget even more closely than in June!

pennywisepoundstupid

Popping out of lurkdom to say what about something homemade for the teachers I'm a TA and its we always love to receive a HM cake/cupcakes or biscuits that can be shared in the staff room.

joeyjimbles

There are endless threads on teacher gifts on the Old School thread - lots of advocates for home made, and lots of opposition. I always made cake for my darlings' teachers - it helps that I had good cred for doing the school cake stalls for years - and they always went down well - apparently. Let's face it, they could have put them straight in the bin for all I know but at least they didn't have to give them house room.
My parents were teachers and guiltily had boxes of ornaments, mugs etc all chosen with care and given with love and not inconsiderable expense but far more than they could ever have used, needed etc.
I would make brownies or loaf cakes in takeaway foil boxes, or cupcakes or cookies in bags and the darlings would make the labels with pictures. Or consider doing a big tin or box (you could repurpose a begged fruit box from the supermarket and get the darlings to decorate it) of home-baked treats a few days before the end of the term for the darlings to deliver to the staff room. In my experience this is better earlier than later as tins of biscuits, chocolates etc tend to come in from others.