From debt to freedom...

louby40

Let's hope they sort out the TC. What an absolute nightmare.

Can you not chase your ex via legal channels? Speaks volumes about what sort of man he must be that he doesn't contribute.

Are you in education?

Honeysucklelou2

Yes Louby, I teach in a primary school.

Legal channels are being presumed but they seem to go very slowly.

helsbell

Honeysucklelou2 wrote: »

Hi Nonnadiluca - thanks for dropping by. Unfortunately the ex ( father to all of the children) didn't pay towards household expenses when he lived here. When I have raised concerns about our finances in the past I've been laughed at. During the marriage we always had separate finances, so I've ended paying the utilities, children's trips, costs of clothing etc. He does provide a meal in Wednesdays for the children. But beyond that it's very hit and miss. On occasion he will turn up with random things e.g. One week he gave a bag of bananas, a pack of oranges and a loaf of bread. He does have 2 income streams of his own. My solicitor is preparing an application for a judicial separation but we have yet to go to court, so I'm hoping for greater clarity when that happens.

You don't need a judicial separation before getting child maintenance. I know you've said before that he won't give you his address, but if you get in touch with the Child Maintenance Service I think they should still be able to help. It may take longer, but the sooner you ask them for some advice the sooner you should get somewhere.

You are an amazing person, being able to cover all the expenses on your own, but the fact is, they are his children too and he should be making a contribution to their upbringing, regardless of how much money you bring home.

louby40

I thought you were a teacher as you've mentioned school etc on my page but wasn't totally sure.

Honeysucklelou2

Yep, best job in the world but sure does take every ounce of energy you have!!

Spendless

Hmmm, I think you'd struggle with an evening/weekend job on top of teaching. If you had a job where you 'finished' at going home time, I'd say go for it, as it is, I think you'll be wiped out physically and emotionally

It must be a struggle for you at the minute.

Honeysucklelou2

Yes, I think I've come to the same conclusion. At least if I sell any plants or produce, it's been as a result of gardening which is my way of relaxing:D. At least the toddler can be with me and is learning all the time as he potters around the garden with me!

Hiddenidenity

Still no news from tax credits then? Don't forget the covering letter and good idea about sending a copy of the postage.

Hope they hurry up for you x

louby40

Honey, I don't know how you would cope with a second job either. Are you part time?

It's a great job but mentally exhausting.

Any news from the tax credits?

Honeysucklelou2

No, still no news or progress. I had a letter come yesterday saying that I had until the 8th of October to pay back £5,000. First job tomorrow will be to ring that department and explain it all to them. I'm guessing that because no single claim has been registered in my name yet, due to the postal difficulties, this letter is assuming I'm not entitled at all and is demanding payment.

I've been trying to think carefully about every purchase. This week I've bought odd bits of groceries but have been able to time it right to pick up reduced fruit, so the children have enjoyed the novelty of having grapes n lunch Boxes!