Impossible Divorce Finances

camdub

Long time reader, first time poster. Would really appreciate some help, don't know where to turn really.

Will be imminently divorced, trying to remortgage family home in which my OH and children stay, to be interest only. Can more than half the cost of it. Broker has made a real hash of it and after 2 months still not sorted. While it is outstanding I am paying for mortgage, service charge, spousal/child support, and all utilities, on top of my own expenses. I have a significant deficit each month and substantial personal debt from this arrangement as well as legal fees.

I feel like the financial settlement we reached through lawyers is very extreme, it's not about fairness it's that I will only have a few hundred pounds left at the end of the month after paying my obligations (I worked while OH looked after the children), and my living expenses.

It is having a significant impact on my health and I don't know what to do. I want our children to stay in their home more than anything and it should be possible if we can find the right mortgage broker, That will help a little bit but I still can't see a way out and I will still have so much debt I don't know what to do with it.

Any help appreciated.

Thank you

karcher

Why are you paying spousal support?

Why is it so important your children stay in the 'family' home?

What is the point of getting in to debt just to keep the soon to be ex wife comfortable?

The children need a home yes...but it doesn't need to be the one they grew up in.

Incurring debt for that end is a pointless one for all involved.

So long as the kids are happy and loved does it really matter what house they live in?

Sambella

Why doesn't your wife claim benefits and pay her own utility bills or get a job and claim tax credits?

why don't your solicitor point out this situation?

Top_Girl

"Only have a few hundred pounds... after paying my obligations... and my living expenses..."

You'll forgive me for not digging out my violin.

tacpot12

I've been in your situation. It is extremely tough and unfair, but there is little alternative. Even if your wife claims all the benefits she can, both you and she aren't going to have surplus money after the essentials are paid for; the basic problem is that loving seperately costs more than living together. It will get better, just keep driving down the debt.

The interest-only mortgage is a concern. How long are you committed to keeping a roof over your ex's head?

chesky

Why are we sure the OP is the husband.

Diary

chesky wrote: »

Why are we sure the OP is the husband.

Girlfriend, boyfriend, wife, husband. Does it make any difference? The OP writes intelligently enough to be able to substitute the status of the ex for any given scenario.

chesky

I was just wondering why other posters naturally assumed it's the husband.

Primrose

if your mortgage broker has made such a mess of things, can you move to a different broker and try to rearrange things. Also, can you not make a formal complaint to the professional body to whom they belong? If they know they're going to be subject to a formal complaint they might get you a better deal?

custardy

chesky wrote: »

I was just wondering why other posters naturally assumed it's the husband.

Because in such a situation it is most likely to be the man moving out and paying support.
Do the OPS gender change the advice that should be given?