Husband stuck in mortgage with defaulting ex, help!

Thrugelmir

silvercar wrote: »

Instead of paying maintenance to the ex and hoping that she pays the mortgage, could he pay the mortgage directly out of the maintenance money?

Seems a sensible proposition.

Sahara85

We did look into this originally but the advice (from CAB I think) was that even if we had a legal agreement drawn up she could still turn around and claim maintenance on top of that. However, clearly something needs to change so that may be something to revisit.

Muscle750

It would be beneificial for him to pay the mortgage as when and if the house is sold in the future he will gain , However if its repo as said any shortfall and they will come after him the ex and the kids will be housed by the council.

kazwookie

What ever you get sorted out get it all in writing, and make sure it is legal tight

AllyMac

Time for a proper legal agreement.
I don't know why he hasn't done that before! Astounds me that people leave such important matters more or less to chance.

She has no right to stay in the house until the kids are 18. It's not uncommon to make that order, but it's not a legal right existing without a court order.

He doesn't have to force a sale - he should force a buy out. That may mean a sale. But if she's now living with her new partner (think so?) they may decide to remortgage together.

The court will certainly look at the needs of the children, but that doesn't mean no order for sale.

One thing I would say though - is to consider his financial responsibility to his children. CMS calculated maintenance is the minimum and can be ridiculously low. If she is defaulting on the mortgage because he's not paying a morally adequate amount towards his children, he should think very carefully about that.

Sahara85

The children are well provided for by him, their mother and me. We take our parenting and financial responsibilities to them very seriously and they never go without. They are with us 50% of the time and we still pay maintenance and all are happy with that. The issue isn't her not being able to afford the mortgage payments, which are less that £400 per month and which she is more than able to afford. It is simply that she is not good at keeping track of things so when mistakes are made like the glitch that happened with the bank in September, she does not act on the issue until we get a letter and then push the matter. Basically, my husband wants out of the house as the lack of communication has caused big problems for us and he really doesn't want to have shared ownership with an ex anymore, but it is frustratingly trickier than we had, perhaps naively, initially thought. The bank are not very forthcoming or helpful in suggesting how we can have more control over what happens with payments as even though husband has joint responsibility they won't discuss money that comes from an account that is not in his name. Thank you for all of the info and suggestions, we will be seeking legal advice to hopefully get a house sale moving.

ACG

I know it is not your job but could you not just text her a week before and day before to remind her of the mortgage?

Thrugelmir

Sahara85 wrote: »

The bank are not very forthcoming or helpful in suggesting how we can have more control over what happens with payments as even though husband has joint responsibility they won't discuss money that comes from an account that is not in his name.

Outside of their remit to become involved. Not their problem to resolve.

Suggest that the maintenance money is paid directly to the mortgage account until such time as the arrears are settled.

Kynthia

I don't know but as the mortgage is also in your husband's name will they not also send him all correspondence and use his number too for any phone calls or updates if he asks?

FBaby

Court will automatically step in and act as the guardians of the childrens welfare. Not quite so straightforward. Nor is it a cheap option.

Indeed they will but they will not systematically assume any longer that remaining in the property still funded by the nrp to be the only option. This happened to my neigbour this year. Her husband left her 4 years ago and she remained in the house with the children. It's a beautiful 4 bedroom detached. Last year, he had a child with his new partner and couldn't afford a mortgage because he is still linked with the house. Neighbour refused to sell so he took it to the court and they rule in his favour.

The reasoning was that there was enough in the equity for her to buy another property that would meet the needs of the children. There are two boys only 2 years apart, so one bedroom was considered adequate. She works so can afford a mortgage. The house was put for sale and she moved a month ago.

Of course some conditions had to be there, mainly that there was enough equity for her to buy another property, that she could move to a smaller one close enough to the boys' school, that she could get a mortgage and he had a real need to for the house to be sold to support his new family.