Should I be worried?

Bogalot

Raspberry_Queen wrote: »

I think it might be an exaggeration to call it a "very serious" mistake. She's naively spread a bit of gossip, not accidentally burned the building down! I agree that some serious grovelling is in order, though.

Severe enough that the victim has made a formal complaint.

How would you feel if a colleague that you have previously had run ins with "naively" spread a rumour that you had an STD? If it was me I would feel humiliated, whether it was true or not.

sangie595

Raspberry_Queen wrote: »

I think it might be an exaggeration to call it a "very serious" mistake. She's naively spread a bit of gossip, not accidentally burned the building down! I agree that some serious grovelling is in order, though.

Really? You think that making malicious gossip about a work colleague that you have already been in trouble about previously is "a bit naïve" and "not very serious"? People are routinely dismissed for far less. And tribunals have upheld those dismissals. Accidentally burning the building down - if a genuine accident - is probably going to get a more sympathetic viewing that spreading malicious rumours about a colleague! Given a history, which is the case here, this is potentially bullying and harassment.

I assume that if one of your colleagues, who you had already had trouble with previously, spread such a rumour about you, you'd be quite sanguine that it's a fuss about nothing?

I'm sorry, but it really is a very serious mistake and one the OP could easily lose her job over. Pretending otherwise is delusional. If she doesn't lose her job, she is going to have to be purer than the driven snow for a very long time to get past this.

Too many people here have got caught up in whether it is true or not, the sexual behaviour of the complainant etc. None of this is relevant. If every word of it is true, it is not up for discussion. The only thing up for discussion is that the OP told two people that her colleague has or might have an STD, and it was none of their business. And if she is no longer her friend, none of hers either. It might have been naïve yes, and it might have been innocent - but it was also stupid (as the OP knows already) and serious.

YouAsked

Agree ^^^

A misguided disclosure *might* be excused, although probably with some level of warning/guidance about conduct.

With the history here, it will very probably be viewed as spiteful gossip which could constitute bullying/harrassment. This has gone formal now and much will depend on the company - how robust its anti-bullying stance is, whether OP has contravened an anti-bullying policy etc and how seriously the employer takes "duty of care" to employees.

I tend not to post unless I can give positive or practical advice, but in this case, I would hate for the OP to go away and think it's not that serious when it certainly could be.

ImessedUp

Would I be suspended while they conduct their investigations? I swear, I genuinely wanted to get the message to her. I have never said she HAS an STI, only that the man she slept with does. Or could I just be invited to the disciplinary and then fired from there?

ScorpiondeRooftrouser

Unfortunately for you it's very difficult to believe this wasn't done maliciously. It's the only way your behaviour makes any sense and the obvious assumption to make, and anyone who looks into this is going to make it.

getmore4less

ImessedUp wrote: »

Its not a joke. I'm sorry. And I actually did it with the best of intentions. Its no secret that she is promiscuous, We are entertained with her stories of her night life on a daily basis. I hoped that the two people I told would tell her so that she could get herself checked out.

I know I have messed up - Its right there in my title. I have worked there for a number of years. I fully expect to be desciplined but wanted to know if I could be sacked for it?

I cant tell you how worried I am and I am sorry. And no I havent apologised to her, I doubt very much that she would accept it anyway

MY first thought would have been she is probably on first name terms down the clinic and was the likely source so no need to tell her.

Going round telling others she is spreading STDs was not a smart move.

TBagpuss

ImessedUp wrote: »

Would I be suspended while they conduct their investigations? I swear, I genuinely wanted to get the message to her. I have never said she HAS an STI, only that the man she slept with does. Or could I just be invited to the disciplinary and then fired from there?

They could chose to suspend you. That is down to the company's policies and the view of the manager carrying out the investigation.

I suggest that you read your employer's disciplinary policy which is likely to set out the process.

Normally, when you are called to a disciplinary meeting you would get a letter telling you when and where the meeting is, and advising you of your right to be accompanied. The letter may also state that the meting may result in sanctions up to and including dismissal.

If your employer decides that your actions amount to gross misconduct then yes, they can dismiss you at the meeting and escort you off the premises there and then. The employer has a wide discretion, so it is up to them to decide whether the behaviour is so serious as to warrent sacking you. Provided that their response is within the range of responses of a reasonable employer, they would not be doinging anythign wrong if they do sack you.

And as on your own admission you made allegations about a colleague to other staff that the victim was (a) promiscuous and (b) potentially suffering from a STD I very much doubt that any employment tribune would consider their actions outside that range, iof they do decide to sack you.

As others have said, you need also to bear in mind that the employer is not investigating her beahviour; her sex life is none of your, or their business, and it is totally irrelevant whether she did slep with this man, whenther she has an active sex life generally or whether or not she may have ben exposed to, or contracted, any STD.

What is relevant is that you spread gossip about her of a kind which you (and any sensible person) would know would be likely to be embarassing and upsetting.

I would recommend that at your interview, you try to make clear that you understnad that and you do not try to justify your actions by getting side-tracked into any comment about her behaviour or your views about it.

Its up to you whether you claim that you were trying to get the information to her for her own good - for the reasons I outlined in my previous post I suspect that that may come over as very unconvincing but that it a matter for you.

ohreally

Perhaps the positive is you've not put it on facebook.

sangie595

I'd also suggest working on a better explanation of why you told two people. Telling one person and asking them to tell her would have been bad enough. But two? If that hadn't worked, would you have told two more? And then another two? It just doesn't sound very convincing - even if true. Although that's the problem with most of this story - even if true it doesn't sound convincing, unfortunately.


Although suspension is a neutral act, and therefore is no true indication, not being suspended MAY suggest that they are not thinking this as a dismissal thing. BUT that is in no way guaranteed. It is simply the case that many employers considering something that serious would also consider a suspension. But it doesn't mean yours thinks that way.

ohreally

sangie595 wrote: »

Although suspension is a neutral act

Not according to the courts.