Student daughter & boyfriend whats fair to ask in housekeeping?

Fireflyaway

Why do you allow a teenage daughter to have a boy spend 75% of his time at your house anyway?!
If this were me I wouldn't allow it to begin with but that's another thread. If he doesn't officially live with you I wouldn't charge him anything. Its unfair to allow it then suddenly start charging him. Either that or allow him to move in properly then set up a lodgers agreement along with rent. His presence probably doesn't cost much. Is it more the principle of it?

mattpaint

I'm confused with this. Do you want your daughter to replace the Government handouts you've received for her? Sounds like she would be better off moving out into student accommodation where she wouldn't be seen as a meal ticket.

silvercar

snowball2 wrote: »

I did not intend and have not asked her for any keep until she starts her Uni course in September when CB & CTC are cut, I have 3 other younger children and exactly the same household expenses with her continuing to live at home but we will be almost £300 a month worse off as of September.

Now I have said £30 a week for her as well starting in September, but I am wondering if I should ask them both to contribute more?

I wish I was in a position to fund everyone, but unfortunately I'm not.

snowball2 wrote: »

We could comfortably meet the bills and live on just our income if it was just the two of us, its these pesky kids that run up the costs feeding and clothing them, school lunches, bus fares ect, although I do expect my eldest daughter to buy her own things most of the time now as she has quite a bit of expendable income through her part time job. We have a small mortgage which will be finished while our two youngest will still be in school.

The drop between 4 and 3 children is almost by half.

Is that right? The drop in income or the drop in benefits is almost half? and that is £300 a month? Something isn't calculated right.
I'm assuming your total monthly income isn't ~ £600, so the "almost half" comment must be your drop in benefits. But I'm struggling with the drop between 4 and 3 children being "almost half" and it being £300 a month. Why would you receive £600 for having 4 children but only £300 for 3?

WillowCat

It would depend on their other income. They are probably having their benefits tapered because of wages, and it may be that no benefits are payable for their wage with 2 children.

snowball2

silvercar wrote: »

Is that right? The drop in income or the drop in benefits is almost half? and that is £300 a month? Something isn't calculated right.
I'm assuming your total monthly income isn't ~ £600, so the "almost half" comment must be your drop in benefits. But I'm struggling with the drop between 4 and 3 children being "almost half" and it being £300 a month. Why would you receive £600 for having 4 children but only £300 for 3?

These are the figures given in my CTC renewal pack, its the way the taper works I suppose as the current gov is cutting back CTC. It seems really unfair to the remaining children, the cost of providing for them certainly is not coming down and my husband has had a wages freeze for the last 3 years and has been told that he wont be getting a pay increase, they have made him work more hours for the same pay already.

KxMx

If you need to ask Daughter and her boyfriend for more, then do so, but i don't expect you'll be able to make up the £300pm shortfall.

Even did you did, when they move out you'd be back to square one, losing £300pm with only moderate decreases in utility bills etc.

So maybe it's a good idea to overhaul family finances now. Look at household outgoings, track spending (which is often illuminating to say the least!), and see where cutbacks and compromises need to happen.

With no pay rises & a benefit cut the answer would seem to be making that same money work harder.

It can be done, before I started my spending diary (a temporary​ measure to see where my alleged surplus was going) I did indeed swear to people I couldn't make my money work harder. I was totally and utterly wrong, still keeping the diary 18 months on and getting more out of my money than I ever did.

Maybe even post on the Debt Free Wannabee board, there are some fab & helpful posters on there who help with budgets & money saving tips.