Should I ask my student son to pay housekeeping?

Camster

I'm looking for some advice on whether I should ask my student son to make a contribution to household bills.

We are in Scotland, so there are no tuition fees, but he has a student loan of about £4,200 a year and has a part time job which earns him around £70 a week.

He started University in September and so far we haven't asked him to contribute anything, as we can manage OK on my income.

I just wanted to ask if it would be too hard on him to ask for a contribution. I was thinking about a token amount of around £50 a month.

Andypandyboy

Do you need the money?

jackyann

I think this depends a lot on how well you can manage, how hard he is studying and what you feel the outcome should be.

I would happily jog along like this if he wasn't taking all of his student loan (or taking it and saving it, as some I have known!) and was working hard. Have you had a conversation with him about it and does he understand your point of view?

At one point, when our family was under some strain, both parents working long hours, but money was OK, I suggested to one of my student children that he did everyone's housework in return for board- which suited him better than getting a job as his course was onerous.

silvercar

Most students struggle to manage on their student loans. If he is working as well to fund himself it does seem harsh to then take money off him. Most parents offer their student offspring money in addition to the loan, assuming he is living at home during term time, he is already saving you the need to subsidise him.

enthusiasticsaver

We gave our daughters money when they were at university although it was away from home. If he is only doing a part time student job it seems harsh to take money off him unless you are struggling. Different if he was working full time.

System

Whilst we were supporting our kids in full time education we supported them financially also.

lika_86

If he's living at home and not paying anything, doesn't have tuition fees to pay and he's working, what is he doing with his loan? I hope it's in a high interest account and making him some money rather than just building up for the sake of it.

sooty&sweep

Hi

Based on your figures I reckon he has the equivalent monthly income of approx £650. Not an insignificant amount of money to have as a disposable income !

A number of questions need to be considered

1 Can you afford to keep him ? If you're struggling to pay the bills etc then yes you should asking for a contribution.
2 Also need to consider what costs you're currently covering. Food gas & electric. What about mobile phone & clothes etc ?
3 If they're treating the place like a hotel & not helping with house work etc that would annoy me & make me more likely to charge.
However he could reduce his income by not taking a full load. Also if you do take money for board you could save it on their behalf as a nest egg.

Jen

gettingtheresometime

Who buys his clothes, books & any other equipment he needs for uni, transport and lunch etc.

onomatopoeia99

I paid approx 30% of my holiday job income to my parents while at university (£25/week out of £80-90). I worked full time 9-5 in the holidays while living with my parents, but not at all during term time when at university 120 miles away My financial situation was similar to your child's - no loans, no tuition fees as I'm old enough to predate that, though my parents earned just enough between them for the parental contribution part of the grant to be all of it except £1.

Camster

Yes, I think he has over £600 a month and his only actual expenses is £40 a month for his bus ticket to Uni. He gets all his meals, laundry etc. provided for him, but buys his own clothes, and pays his own mobile phone (PAYG).

We don't actually need the money, but I thought that it wasn't unreasonable to ask him to contribute towards the cost of food, gas etc given the money he has available each month.

Also, maybe I'm a bit old fashioned, but I've always thought that when you turn 18 you become an adult and should no longer be treated as a child. To me part of that involves contributing to the family where you are able to.