When are you a grown up?

Pennysmakepounds

What a fun thread...

I think everyone has their own opinion of being grown up...

However, some people get 'old' before their time, through a mixture of grief and harshness of life.

I still remember my 19th birthday as if was yesterday and i stop trying to remember how old i was around 40...

To an outsider:-
I am a responsible, sensible, extremely hardworking, down to earth individual with 3 kids, nagging wife , house, car and a good job.

To me:
I'm waiting for the day when my kids are all grown up and i can shed all my responsibilities and its just me and the love of my life 'AGAIN' free to do what we want.....instead of what we need to ...

In the meantime i occasionally (ok ok quite often ) let the inner child out and act like a 5 year old again...

on these occasions - The wife complains she has 4 kids... and i ask her who she had an affair with and then i get a slap around the ear.... lol

spadoosh

KingS6 wrote: »

Whenever someone decides to "step up to the plate".

Some people never do this and therefore never become true adults.

What plate? This kind of things makes me laugh. For most of my life ive been the bright 'idiot'. Doesnt apply himself was in my report cards, must try harder. Im the joker, the irresponsible one and have had to deal with copious amounts of people telling me how ive stepped up to the plate being a new dad. Im still a royal bell for all intents and purposes i just happen to have a daughter, the only thing thats changed is ive fallen in love with someone else. Im extremely pragmatic and seldom view 'life' as me, im just here to enjoy the ride. People get too involved with themselves when the reality is you (read everyone) and your (read everyones) life is so incredibly insignificant the 'plates your standing up' to dont matter.

I know someone who took off round the world. They enjoy every second of life with only immediate responsibilities to worry about. They are far more happy than the majority of 'responsible' people i know who spend far too long worrying about problems that arent actually problems. For large parts of the world drought is a problem, famine a problem etc etc yet in the UK the internet going down is a problem or someones cat pooing in your garden is a problem.

Robisere wrote: »

One big lesson that my dad taught me: "Never grow up son. People expect far too much of you when they think you're grown up. Leave room in your life for a little bit of Daft." Spoken after a particularly hectic confrontation with my mother, I think.

I really like this.



ETA i first felt a grown up when i was 16.... oi oi!

No when i started at work (retail shop) it took a couple of years being the baby face that i was but when you hear a toddler/child/teen/parent say something along the lines of "theres a man there you can ask" and youd look over your shoulder hoping they where referring to a colleague. Youre an adult when a child says you are, youre no longer accepted. It can be staved off with a profound immaturity though. Keep fighting the good fight!

Robisere

You know you're never, ever going to grow up when the friends of your grandbrats ask if YOU are going to be at the Party/do/whatever " 'cos your granddad is funny and cool!"

Just happened to me according to granddaughter's phone call...

Worry makes you older. After certain things I experienced in my Army service, and being resuscitated 3 times in 3 days in a hospital, nothing has ever worried me again. With the exception of illnesses or accidents in the family.

Peter333

Andypandyboy wrote: »

When your parents die, and you realise you are the oldest generation....

Very poignant.

thorsoak wrote: »

I'm not sure ...I'm only 73 - and having problems accepting the fact that my big brother has now turned 80 - does that mean that we ought to be grown ups now? :-D

piglet74 wrote: »

Are you honestly 73?? I obviously don't know you, but I can't believe that you are 73, judging that solely on your posts, you just seem so much younger!

Yeah this shocked me too. :eek:

NBLondon wrote: »

I did a double-take last week seeing a job application with DoB ending in 00

I have noticed this recently too. :eek: Actual full time employees born in the 2000's!

Pyxis wrote: »

On the rare occasion (these days!) when a shop assistant or similar calls me Madam! Then I think, "ooooh! I must be grown up!"

Or, on the equally rare occasion (!) when someone says to me " Could I ask your advice, please?" Then I feel very wise, like a tribal elder!

You know you're getting proper old, when people start calling you 'dear....' :rotfl:

PasturesNew wrote: »

You're grown up when you consciously stop doing something you want - and attend to something you have to do.... and not just once, but every time it's needed.

Everything from changing out of your PJs because the vicar's coming round ... to turning up for work every day on time and not bunking off.

There's no age limits.... there are still some childish 4rses flitting around in their 70s.

:T

I don't there is any particular age where you are 'grown up.' Some people think doing certain things makes them grown up, but it really doesn't. I have known some people who assume because they started having children at a young age, that this makes them all grown up and 'wordly wise.' Some people I have known, who had children young (like under 21,) seemed to stay quite immature, and never really grew up.

Some of the most incredibly childish women at my kids school were ones who had started having kids under 21, and never went out to work. The women who left it longer, and went to uni, and/or travelled, dabbled in several careers and so on, have always seemed a lot more grown up, mature, and sensible.

In addition, several people I know who had very strict, prim, strait-laced parents, (who never let them be children,) have got to middle age now, and act like teenagers - and not in a good way. They make themselves look ridiculous.

thorsoak

Peter333 wrote: »

Very poignant.





Yeah this shocked me too. :eek:



I have noticed this recently too. :eek: Actual full time employees born in the 2000's!



You know you're getting proper old, when people start calling you 'dear....' :rotfl:



:T

I don't there is any particular age where you are 'grown up.' Some people think doing certain things makes them grown up, but it really doesn't. I have known some people who assume because they started having children at a young age, that this makes them all grown up and 'wordly wise.' Some people I have known, who had children young (like under 21,) seemed to stay quite immature, and never really grew up.

Some of the most incredibly childish women at my kids school were ones who had started having kids under 21, and never went out to work. The women who left it longer, and went to uni, and/or travelled, dabbled in several careers and so on, have always seemed a lot more grown up, mature, and sensible.

In addition, several people I know who had very strict, prim, strait-laced parents, (who never let them be children,) have got to middle age now, and act like teenagers - and not in a good way. They make themselves look ridiculous.

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Hermia

spadoosh wrote: »

I know someone who took off round the world. They enjoy every second of life with only immediate responsibilities to worry about. They are far more happy than the majority of 'responsible' people i know who spend far too long worrying about problems that arent actually problems. For large parts of the world drought is a problem, famine a problem etc etc yet in the UK the internet going down is a problem or someones cat pooing in your garden is a problem.

I know a guy in his 50s who gets called childish and irresponsible a lot. It is because he has never had any interest in settling down and he spends 8 months a year working his bum off (luckily he is a very in-demand freelancer) and 4 months backpacking around the world. I don't get the criticism. He has savings and pensions in case he can no longer work in the future. He has always fulfilled his duties when needed (i.e. caring for his parents when they were dying). He has always been honest with women re: the fact that he will never settle down. He does a lot for the community and his friends. He seems far more adult to me in that he has actually planned for the life he wanted rather than just doing what was expected.

I don't really get the whole being adult thing. As long as someone is not hurting others who cares what they do?

marisco_2

Being diagnosed with a serious illness and protecting my children from knowing anything about it made me grow up fast. Didn't realise how happy and carefree my life was and wish I still had the energy to juggle everything I did in my laid back, haphazard way.

skoda526

The first time I walked down my street in a new pressed uniform at the start of my national service.
:A

BargainSpotter

I realised that I was a grown up when having ice cream in the middle of winter didn't appeal any more.......:o

consumers_revenge

I think the fact that I have told everyone I'm 42 for the last 3 years says I'm not growing up.




Even I believe I'm 42 now.