Concerned for my aunty's money

albert101

OP, if you think people here - who are impartial and do not know you - are accusing you of trying to rob your aunt, just wait until your relatives get involved...

Amen to that. £500k plus her home adds up to a sizeable estate at some stage in the future. Assuming she has no children of her own, I'm afraid there is a chance all sorts of random relatives will start taking an interest, if not now then later on.

Doubt she needs to be looking at buying property to rent out etc., which is a hassle to manage at any age, let alone hers. The many eggs in one basket is a risk, so spreading it around into different accounts would seem to be one immediate sensible step that should be considered. Getting a financial advisor would be another.

amibovvered

Surely it's up to 'Auntie' who her next of kin is? It doesn't even have to be a blood relative. When my uncle's health worsened and he moved to a residential care home, I didn't even know until I rang him at the previous residence to arrange a visit. My brother and I were his only living relatives, but he had his god-daughter down as next of kin. When he died a couple of months later, she and her family arranged the funeral and wake, although my brother and I were invited. They were also the beneficiaries of his will (although, to be fair, my brother and I had received a similar amount of money during his lifetime).

Ultimately it didn't bother me too much as he died just 5 months after his sister, my mother, and I was barely over her death and having to arrange her funeral, but when I first tried to call him and discovered he'd been moved without me even being informed I was rather shocked!

However, they were closer to him (literally, as they were in Wales and we were in England) so I soon accepted it made perfect sense.

le_loup

amibovvered wrote: »

Surely it's up to 'Auntie' who her next of kin is?

Well that's the weirdest thing I've ever read on the internet full of weird things!

masonic

le_loup wrote: »

Well that's the weirdest thing I've ever read on the internet full of weird things!

Oddly enough, in the UK you can nominate anybody you like to be your next of kin. It doesn't give you any special rights, although if you are hospitalised and incapacitated, the doctors may consider the next of kin's views when making healthcare decisions. It certainly doesn't give them the right to control the financial affairs of the individual, nor any right to an inheritance.

But it is clear enough that you meant immediate family members in your question.

atush

My_aunty's_nephew wrote: »

Thank you to those of you who have provided constructive advice. And for those of you who seem to prefer to provide criticism and suggestions that I am in some way trying to rob my own Aunty, even though I have said this is not about me and that I've got no interest in gaining anything, can I suggest you vent your negative and horrible thoughts elsewhere as your comments are in no way helpful or welcome.

RE read your posts and you may see where others are coming from?

Anyway. my suggestion is that you suggest she has work done on her own home, that could mean she would be able to stay there longer. If there is room for you to move in and help her, so much the better.

That she writes a will, and decides for herself who she wants to inherit her estate (that could be you or someone else), and that if she is concerned with IHT she starts making gifts from her income now.

shortcrust

le_loup wrote: »

Well that's the weirdest thing I've ever read on the internet full of weird things!

Why is that weird? Of course you can decide who your next of kin is. My father and grandfather are estranged so I'm my grandfather's next of kin. My sister is next of kin to an old family friend even though she has a son in Australia.

bigadaj

le_loup wrote: »

Well that's the weirdest thing I've ever read on the internet full of weird things!

If that's the weirdest thing you've read on the net your use of the interweb must be quite limited.

ViolaLass

Does Auntie want you to look after her when she can't do it herself?

margaretclare

I am the same age as your Aunty. Not as wealthy as she is, and I'm happily married for the second time. Otherwise, probably some similarities.

The main thing is, if anyone ever, ever, in any shape or form, took it upon themselves to write about my affairs, financial or otherwise, in an open internet forum, I would be incandescent with rage. Whatever their relationship to me, that relationship would be ended forthwith.

I will decide where I keep my money. It may gain better interest somewhere else - so what. No one else's business.

I can write about my affairs, but no one else can do so. Stick to your own business and let Aunty do what she wants. She earned it, after all. Let her do what she likes with it.

ChesterDog

I thought it worth carefully reading your opening post again, which I have just done.

Some further thoughts now come to mind.

Why are you planning around providing 'close care' (as you put it) for your aunt? Does she want a nephew to do that for her if needed? Will that be better than a professional service of some sort that she will be perfectly able to fund?

I have provided care of all sorts to my disabled wife for more than a decade. In your position and your aunt's I would advise against it, not least because it involves transfer of money in some form to you to enable it. That creates a conflict of interest whether you like it or not.

Furthermore, why the assumption that she will require it? Having made suitable provision for it (property, refurbishment...) what if she then dies? Will you return those assets to her estate?

My advice: talk to your aunt about moving the bulk of her savings to NS&I.

Stop there.