The rising financial costs of getting Dementia

Tipsntreats

missbiggles1 I am Not saying it is a bad thing. I am a relatives support in a care home. Recently, the cost of care there has increased. I have had discussions with several of the relatives, who are really struggling with the choices they have to make. Down size their home, a home they have lived in all their lives, as all their savings have now gone. Move their loved one to a cheaper care home, when they seem to be fairly settled in the current one. I think it is emotional trauma for them. A trauma that they could have NEVER prepared for. So this thread is NOT about moaning about myself.
Funding HAS been cut in social services. If the relatives ask for a top up, they are told to down size their property, or move their loved one to a cheaper home! Many, not all,of the relatives are elderly themselves. The prospect of moving, as well as the emotional trauma of seeing their loved one decline, is tear jerking!

suki1964

Tipsntreats wrote: »

missbiggles1 I am Not saying it is a bad thing. I am a relatives support in a care home. Recently, the cost of care there has increased. I have had discussions with several of the relatives, who are really struggling with the choices they have to make. Down size their home, a home they have lived in all their lives, as all their savings have now gone. Move their loved one to a cheaper care home, when they seem to be fairly settled in the current one. I think it is emotional trauma for them. A trauma that they could have NEVER prepared for. So this thread is NOT about moaning about myself.
Funding HAS been cut in social services. If the relatives ask for a top up, they are told to down size their property, or move their loved one to a cheaper home! Many, not all,of the relatives are elderly themselves. The prospect of moving, as well as the emotional trauma of seeing their loved one decline, is tear jerking!

So what is this thread for and whys it in old style ?

If it's for you to sound off, then either discussion time or the over 50's

If it's for people to moan in general about having these costs, once again, over 50's or discussion time

Cos there's nothing old style about it unless we are talking about caring for our reletitives at home, the way we cared ( are caring) for our parents, did do for grandparents, ggparents etc

If you pm glad she will move it

moneyistooshorttomention

Tipsntreats wrote: »

I DID state his care WAS more important to me. This thread is to prepare others. What if it is a husband or wife had to be taken into care? If they own their own house, then after all their savings have been depleted, leaving only £23,250. Then a charge will be placed on the property. It makes absolutely NO difference if a will states the property will be left, to whoever. The property will have to be sold and the cost of care paid back! That applies only if a partner is living in the property. If not then the property will have to be sold immediately! If a property is left in a will to the children, then they will inherit NOTHING!

I sympathise. Right now I have a friend in this position. She's housed her elderly mother for many years and mother has recently been diagnosed as having dementia and had to go into a home. Mother doesnt have a house or THAT much money over the savings limit - so there isnt that much that will be lost. But I know my friend has visions of landing up getting nothing much at all come the time - as her mother made her verbally promise to share the money with her children/mothers grandchildren and she intends to keep that promise. My friend still has a mortgage and needs a lot of work doing on her house and had been hoping for at least a few thousand £s towards this - but has had to resign herself to being lucky to get anything come the time.

This topic isnt strictly an Old Style sub-forum one on the one hand. There are quite a few people not in this position (and a few who are in this position) that won't sympathise at all and it's deemed to be a very controversial topic and opinions do tend to get a bit "heated" about it. So - you are going to find a noticeable number of people that won't sympathise with this.

I do sympathise personally - but have often seen how "heated" things can get when this topic is debated. As far as I've ever been able to work out - people don't go into carehomes in the first place unless their health is too bad to stay in their own home. In which case - then it's a health care necessity and not a "social" thing at all imo. I'm certainly noticing a couple of people right now that are in bad health (one of them extremely bad health) and they are struggling on in their own homes as best they can and with a "cobbled together" package of care. But that is really only possible, I feel, if its physical health problems. If its mental health problems (eg dementia) then that isnt possible.

I think it was about 30 years ago that people having their savings/houses taken to pay for carehomes they have no choice but to be in (ie because of those health care needs) came in??? So - younger people may not remember that era and thus feel differently about it to those of us that are old enough to remember Normal Times in that respect.

suki1964

moneyistooshorttomention wrote: »

I sympathise. Right now I have a friend in this position. She's housed her elderly mother for many years and mother has recently been diagnosed as having dementia and had to go into a home. Mother doesnt have a house or THAT much money over the savings limit - so there isnt that much that will be lost. But I know my friend has visions of landing up getting nothing much at all come the time - as her mother made her verbally promise to share the money with her children/mothers grandchildren and she intends to keep that promise. My friend still has a mortgage and needs a lot of work doing on her house and had been hoping for at least a few thousand £s towards this - but has had to resign herself to being lucky to get anything come the time.

This topic isnt strictly an Old Style sub-forum one on the one hand. There are quite a few people not in this position (and a few who are in this position) that won't sympathise at all and it's deemed to be a very controversial topic and opinions do tend to get a bit "heated" about it. So - you are going to find a noticeable number of people that won't sympathise with this.

I do sympathise personally - but have often seen how "heated" things can get when this topic is debated.

Why is your friend expecting her mother to find her????

Surely she should be self supporting and not relying on elderly parents having saved enough to give her an inheritance ??

moneyistooshorttomention

She isnt "expecting" funding. She was "hoping" for a "bit of help" - but has basically mentally "written it off" now.

I think her more immediate concern is that there may be problems with staying in the care home selected when the savings have been run down to the allowable level. Thus concern in case mother is put in a lower-quality care home if (when...!) that point is reached. She feels bad about the whole situation as it is...

Tipsntreats

Lets Not get the wrong end of the thread here, so to speak.
The idea is to prepare, some of you in this OS forum, for the unexpected future. Dementia can happen at any age!!!!
Yes I fully know that I could have started in the over 50's forum.
I also know that I will receive a lot of negative comments here. It's a shame as I really wish someone could have helped me Ten years ago. It has been a complete learning curve for me.

Can we not all support each other here?

Mojisola I beg to differ on your point. If a relative, asks for financial support, when a loved one is already in care. Then the value of their property is taken into consideration. Why else have their partners been told to down size or move their loved one to cheaper accommodation?

Mojisola

Tipsntreats wrote: »

Mojisola I beg to differ on your point. If a relative, asks for financial support, when a loved one is already in care. Then the value of their property is taken into consideration. Why else have their partners been told to down size or move their loved one to cheaper accommodation?

If anyone has been told this, the person who told them should be retrained!

https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/site/scripts/documents_info.php?documentID=2710
Property and the financial assessment for care home fees
If the person with dementia owns their own home, this may be included in the financial assessment to determine who pays care home fees. However, the home will not be taken into account if one of the following people also lives in the property, and will continue to live there after the person has moved into a care home:
a husband, wife or civil partner
a close relative over the age of 60 (as set out in the guidance used by local authorities)
a dependent child
a relative who is disabled or incapacitated.

AgeUK also do a range of very useful fact sheets on paying for care.

suki1964

Mojisolar has beat me to it

Who ever is giving you advice is giving wrong advice

It's personal savings to be below the 23k mark, joint savings are looked at differently, if the partner who's not going into care can prove the majority are theirs, well they get to keep theirs

Same as a house. Partner has a lifetime interest in that house. It's not till the home is sold for downsizing or partner dies, do the council come after their share

Tipsntreats

Mojisola I stand corrected, but also confused. As I am not in that kind of situation, I can only relate what the relatives told me. That is a very valid point that you have made! I shall now find out more from the relatives, and more importantly who told them this!
Thank-you

Tipsntreats

I have just been able to speak to just one of the relatives. I did't think I had got it wrong!!!!
The council have a cap on how much they will pay towards care. If the fees are above what they are willing to pay, then the relative is given the choices that I related. The law and what actually happens in reality are two different things. His wife has been in the care home for more than five years. He has used up BOTH of their savings. All he has left is their home. I advised him to apply for continuing care funding. His wife did't get it, actually I don't anyone that has ever been awarded it.