Living with a bipolar partner

Skylar34

Hi,


Not sure if this is the right place to post and please move if not, am not a troll and am not asking for any medical advice but wondered if there is anyone on here who lives with a partner with bipolar or mental health issues?


Starting to suspect my partner of 10 years is bipolar, he is in his 40's and the mood swings are unreal, seems to go in cycles, when he is nice he is the most funny and nice person but the alternative is either an aggressive or depressive stress head where the slightest thing can set him off, this usually lasts for several weeks then seems to revert back to his normal cheery self.


Doctors have not been much help, both of us went and described the moods and were pretty much laughed at and offered counselling. He has had all the health tests under the sun and only thing that came back was very low vitamin d which he is now on tablets for. They don't seem to be taking it seriously.


Just not sure where to go or what to do as can't seem to get any help from doctors, any advice or anyone who lives with a partner with mental health issues would be much appreciated.

fairy_lights

Did he take them up on the offer of counselling?

Alice_Walker

Could he just be a moody person?

Mania is not funny and nice, it's incredibly intense and can be scary for both the person and those around them. It's not sleeping for days on end, displaying reckless behaviour.

If your partner wants help with his mood swings he can ask for a referral to counselling or, if sufficiently serious, to the community mental health team. He/ you really should leave diagnoses to the professionals.

interstellaflyer

OP, I live with a partner who has BiPolar affected Disorder, what you describe doesn't fit my experience, I'm not saying there is not some sort of mental health issue just that it doesn't sound like BiPolar, could these mmod swings and bouts of depression coincide with times that your partner may be under a lot of stress?

Skylar34

He did agree to the counselling but still waiting for an appointment to come through. Whilst I think this could help, when he is off on one there is no talking to him, he can't seem to see that he is being irrational/aggressive


It could be that he is just a moody person but sometimes the slightest things can set him off, things that most level headed people would not bat an eye lid at. The sleeping patterns are erratic sometimes he is awake half the night, I don't notice that so much as once I am asleep that's me until the alarm goes off when he will say he has been awake since 3am or so.


Its no fun living with someone like this to be honest but don't know where to go from here

Skylar34

Thanks for the reply Interstella, is your partner on any medication? how do you deal with it?


It could well just be stress, he has always blamed it on work but had a number of different jobs and it seems to be the same pattern of behaviour whatever job he is in.


The first doctor we saw together just basically laughed and asked him if I was stressing him out at home! that was when he was offered the counselling. He saw a different doctor again on his own not so long ago who didn't really give an opinion but asked for a barrage of tests, all which came clear apart from vitamin d which the doctor has said could be affecting his moods, it could well be just that but not much online about it.


To be honest he has been like this most of our relationship, he did start off very calm and laid back and then it gradually became apparent that he could be like it, it used to be a lot further between episodes but as he is getting older the time periods are getting closer together. The only way I can describe it when he is not himself is living with a ticking timebomb or Jekyll and hyde as he can be fine one minute then lose it the next, he seems to be constantly wound up, if driving he will be shouting and screaming at people to move, effing and blinding, his behaviour at times like that is not what I would call normal for a man in his 40's..think more toddler like!

gwynlas

Depending on your circumstances now is the time to consult a psychiatrist. You can find out from GP who offers private appointments or who they would recommend. It is very rare these days for mental health teams to be able to offer much time to anyone who isn't suffering full blown mental illness. If you were offerred counselling chances are it would be time limited and any Dr you see is likely to be in traing and therefor on a rotation. Costs would be 200-300 pounds depending on area but at least then your partner would have a proper diagnosis,

Dill

They won't get a referral if the GP doesn't think it necessary nor that there is a serious mental health problem.

System

:hello::hello::hello::hello:

The sun is a good source of vitamin D. Nice sunny day today to absorb that D vit, but of course use plenty of sun cream! Safety first

Skylar34

Thank you, to be honest I kind of dismissed the vitamin d think but will see how he gets on with the pills he has been given.


He eats healthy and does exercise a few times a week but still a stroppy git! think male pmt x 10!


Have booked to see doctor again with him so will take it from there as this is wearing me down its no fun to live with someone who can be fine one minute and then shouting and bawling over nothing the next

Ames

Spinkz wrote: »

:hello::hello::hello::hello:

The sun is a good source of vitamin D. Nice sunny day today to absorb that D vit, but of course use plenty of sun cream! Safety first

Except that sun cream stops absorption of Vitamin D.

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