'Mental Health and Debt: New guide to come' blog discussion

Errata

MSE_Martin wrote: »

Thanks for all the feedback above. It convinces me how important what we're doing is.

As for the "posting titles" I will take a look today

I see we all now have new 'handles'. A sensitive and speedy response, well done. I'm very pleased that I, with others, am now a nerd.

katesohm

Having had MH issues myself some years ago, caused by the joint suicide of my parents, then recieving thier estate, i procedded to blow the money on ebay and other useless items to try and make myself feel better, never opening the parcels or post when it arrived some six years later, now i have recovered to a point where i would consider myself to pass as noramll to the outside world, however i dont think Mental illness ever goes fully away.

I am trying to undo some of the damage i did to my credit rating and bank balance durring that time, i could kick myself at the money that just flowed through my hands to try and make me feel better with out any meaning, now i am working a 60 hour week to try and get straight.

I think this issue needs to be addressed from both sides of the coin in helping people with debt and helping people with managment of exisitng momies in times of crisis.

sunnyflower

Congratulations Martin for your decision to raise awareness and give practical help and advice to a neglected LARGE part of the community.

Individuals with mental health problems don't grab the publics attention in the way that chldren, puppies and natural disasters do (NOT a criticism of those who do support these, just a fact).


And all you PC Brigade; wind your neck in!! If you choose to be offended by words that have been in the English language for years and years and years, keep it to yourselves so that the people who are doing something POSITIVE for others can focus on their efforts

tallyb1

I have bipolar disorder and lost my medical career which made the fact I had huge debts from medical school worse. I was then made bankrupt. My spending resulted from when I was low as i loved the buzz from purchasing. I now work in psychiatry and the majority of people I see have financial problems due to a combination of behaviours caused by illness and the fact benefits are so low which makes day to day life difficult and also difficult to pay back debts incurred before illness. Its a pity that tv executives obviously havent done their research as 1 in 4 people have a mental health problem and debts can also act as a significant stressor to trigger mental illness

little_miss_spender

I just wanted to say Martin you never cease to amaze me, you really have got your finger on the pulse. I couldnt believe it when i read the title of your new guide mental health and debt, i nearly fell off my chair, because i in the process of building a new web site which i must add is not up and running yet still lots to do, because i dont want to miss out anything. But genuinely it is called amireallymad.com written by me, based on my own first hand experiences of being in debt on more than one occasion and getting out of debt then doing it all over again but worse.

Dont they say you should learn by your mistakes, not in my case i am afraid. I have suffered from depression as young as 6-7 years old and labeled a moody child. It was first noticed funnily enough by the teachers at my primary school, as i never ever played with the other children, and i cried most of the time. It was mentioned to my parents but nobody did anything just told me to get on with school and be "normal". I can not begin to tell you how lonely i was and confused that everyone else was happy and i wasnt, i just wanted to stay in my bedroom, and to this day i still dont know why, i have a better idea now and truly believe that it is hereditory, as my father was violent sometimes and then hyperactive and overoptomistic, sometimes he was tight with his money to the extreme and then other days would throw it around as if he was king midas. Then you would catch him sobbing like a baby, he thought i never saw him but i did.

So when i finally understood that i wasnt mad i was actually ill that in itself was a big step in my life, because before i admitted to my self i needed help, the only way i could live my life was to act and be someone else sort of my other self. when i was little i had an invisible friend and basicaly she was everything i wasnt so i became her, this helped me to get along in life but it wasnt addressing the real problem behind the facade, because in this little imaginary world i had created, nothing was a problem, but in reality i would ignore the problems and not face them because that wasnt part of my world. I would spend money that i hadnt got like water and then want to kill myself for doing it. I

had high optimism and unreachable goals and ambitions one day and felt worthless the next. This has been going on for 30 years for heavens sake and although i have asked for help i never got any real help or understanding from anyone, until my father died last year and i had a very bad nervous collapse as the doctor called it they dont call it a nervous breakdown anymore.

This is where everything changed once again for me and scared me to death. I had always thought i was just nuts and people used to say i was the life and soul of the party always chatty and happy but that was the other me, behind closed doors they would not have thought it was the same person. I have had friends in the past tell me they have had a nervuos breakdown but what ever they had was nothing like what I would describe a nervous breakdown to be and this is where society gets it all wrong, as i did before it happened to me. i used to think a nervouse breakdown was when you had the shakes a bit and cried a lot. How wrong was I? Because this is what happened to me, I got in the shower not feeling great at the time it was a couple of months after my dads funeral and all of a sudden my mind started racing and flitting from one issue to another and I started to cry and then something i can only describe as an elastic band snapped in my head, I fell to the floor of the shower and curled up in a ball and started to shake violently. The only thing i can remember after that is being carried in a towel to my bed by my husband who was in total shock and didnt know what to do.

I couldnt speak all my words were muddled and i was just a dithering ,incoherant, howling mess. When i finally stopped crying for a few minutes, my memory had gone, i didnt even know our telephone number or my own date of birth. SO NOW I KNEW WHAT A NERVOUS BREAKDOWN WAS AND THIS WAS IT. I went from someone who was in control off everything well it seemed that way to someone incapable of even answering the telephone, i would just jump out of my skin every time it rang. the doctor came and tried to section me until my husband persuaded him he could cope with me and that i would go and see the mental health team.

Now this is where it all gets really sad and unbelievable, the pysychiatrist refused to see me, and you will never gues the reason why it was because i had told him the last time i was really ill that i couldnt not Wouldnt go and be on a course for 12 weeks 8 hours a day five days a week because at the time i was a carer for my father and could nt leave him alone, i was told then that if i wasnt prepared to help myself then he wasnt going to help me and basically never darken his doorstep again. Hence this time around i was much much worse but he still refused to see me, and believe it or not he is the only phsychiatrist in our area so its tough. So I have had to do this on my own trying to figure out with the help of my husband ways to get me back on my feet again and sort out the debt thing, hence that is where the website idea came from.

Oh I am so sorry i have gone on too much i will write again soon I have already taken up a lot of everybodys time just reading this. thank you and thankyou martin for making people realise how devastating mental illness is and what it does to people and their families and how much ignorance there is around on the subject. you are a starr martin :A :T :A :T :A :T :A :T :j :beer:

tallyb1

I think perhaps some posts need looking at as sometimes people write things when obviously very unwell

seven-day-weekend

Iguana wrote: »

How do you encourage the families and carers to access this kind of service when they are bogged down with caring for somone which can occupy their whole life?

I would add this is not a critism! but I do feel it is a valid point!

Because it will enable them to care more efficienetly. I have cared for a person with severe depression and although he did not have financial problems, if he had, knowing where to get some sort of help andd support would have been a life-saver.

pugspitz

Thank you for looking into this area. Bordeline Personality Disorder symptoms mention impulsivity. This is often to do with over spending. However theres a danger of refusing debt to someone who has a mental illness as they may not be impulsive in the area of debt and may manage their finances well. I would imagine its very tricky to legislate to stop people going into debt as that could be seen as an infringement of personal choice. If someone has say [post natal depression should they be prevented from taking out a loan?
Interesting conundrum hope you manage to find a solution but its beyond me!

dawn35

Hi Martin.

I have suffered with money problems since I have been able to earn money therefore was able to borrow. I took out my first loan at 17 years old. I am now 37.

I had my first physchatrist (two of them at the same time actually) when i was 15 and have been treated for depression related illnesses ever since. I had a very mentally abusive childhood and was privvy to alot of things I shouldnt have been at such a young age. I was also abandonded by my mother when I was 12. All of this had led to me feeling insecure and constantly trying to 'buy' affection, or 'buy' a happy feeling. I dont know wether I was born this way or whether this has happened to me because of my childhood. I have been addicted to drugs, booze, painkillers, and at the min am 5 months gamble free. All the things i do to make me feel better in reality hurt me. Everything i do seems to be to excess, never anything in moderation. I was decalred bankrupt in august this year for the second time, the first time round was in 97. This year I lost my home, my business, and no doubt the respect of my family. I told the bank of my addiction and they just kept throwing money at me. Unfortuantly people with mental health issues or addictions can become very machovelian when it comes to getting credit and i think these banks etc should make sure that instead of putting huge sums of money into people bank accounts they should pay the money direct to the debtors etc.

I am once again rebuilding my life. Its not the first and wont be the last. Im currently battling the black moods and when they come i now try to ride them rather than taking meds or being afraid. I know they will pass. Mental health problems and money just do not mix in my opinion.

D x

tulketh

I agree it wont be easy to implement any restrictions on loans to people with MH difficulties I think the support is needed to get them out of difficulties more easily than try to prevent the debt other than by education certainly not legislation