Don't know which way to turn

lynseydee

I separated from my husband in December 2014 but didn't move out of the marital home until September 2015 when he attacked me. The police were involved but he is denying what he did and so the police didn't take the matter any further.

I moved back to the town where my family are and am now renting my own property. He still lives in the marital home.

I told him tonight that we need to sell the house as my outgoings are exceeding my incomings and he is refusing and telling me I'll have to take him to court. The thing is I don't have any money to take him to court!! I have sought legal advice about getting a divorce through legal aid as I know I have to proceed with divorce to enable me to force a sale of the house but legal aid is not given for divorce cases anymore.

I'm trying to claim housing benefit but don't know if I will be entitled as there is equity in the house.

He's left me paying the credit card debt (admittedly the cards are in my name but it is joint marital debt) and doesn't contribute towards our son's pre-school fees. I receive no maintenance with regards to our son at all.

I'm not sure what I should do. I'm so worried about where money is going to come from that I'm already in my overdraft and have no money to buy essentials food wise.

What can I do? I feel as though I've got nowhere to turn.

Tigsteroonie

You don't have to use a solicitor to go through divorce & the subsequent financial proceedings - it is possible to do this yourself, for guidance look at the Wikivorce website and forum.

However I think the more pressing issue is that of maintenance for your son, that is a separate issue which can be sorted independently of the divorce. Hopefully someone will pop along soon with clear guidance for you, unfortunately this isn't an area I know anything about.

In the meantime, the usual questions - how long were you married, and how long did you cohabit before the marriage? What is the value of the house, and what is the equity? Is the house jointly owned? Presumably he is meeting all the mortgage payments. How big was the credit card debt when you split? Sorry to bombard, but this will all help with working things out in the long term :-)

Detroit

lynseydee wrote: »

I separated from my husband in December 2014 but didn't move out of the marital home until September 2015 when he attacked me. The police were involved but he is denying what he did and so the police didn't take the matter any further.

I moved back to the town where my family are and am now renting my own property. He still lives in the marital home.

I told him tonight that we need to sell the house as my outgoings are exceeding my incomings and he is refusing and telling me I'll have to take him to court. The thing is I don't have any money to take him to court!! I have sought legal advice about getting a divorce through legal aid as I know I have to proceed with divorce to enable me to force a sale of the house but legal aid is not given for divorce cases anymore.

I'm trying to claim housing benefit but don't know if I will be entitled as there is equity in the house.

He's left me paying the credit card debt (admittedly the cards are in my name but it is joint marital debt) and doesn't contribute towards our son's pre-school fees. I receive no maintenance with regards to our son at all.

I'm not sure what I should do. I'm so worried about where money is going to come from that I'm already in my overdraft and have no money to buy essentials food wise.

What can I do? I feel as though I've got nowhere to turn.

You may still be able to get legal help for some aspects of divorce where domestic violence is involved. Contact CAB or a women's advisory service such as womens aid for sdvice.
CABx often have visiting solicitors who will give you a fixed time appointment, say 15mins, without charge to give you initial advice and check your eligibility for legal help.

If your income is low, you may be able to get HB for up to 26 weeks despite owning another property you don't live in, if you're trying to sell the property. Possibly for longer if your ex partner is living in the property.

Check out child maintenance options, the child support agency website for information on getting child support.

Advice on the debts can also be obtained from CAB.

lynseydee

Tigsteroonie wrote: »

You don't have to use a solicitor to go through divorce & the subsequent financial proceedings - it is possible to do this yourself, for guidance look at the Wikivorce website and forum.

However I think the more pressing issue is that of maintenance for your son, that is a separate issue which can be sorted independently of the divorce. Hopefully someone will pop along soon with clear guidance for you, unfortunately this isn't an area I know anything about.

In the meantime, the usual questions - how long were you married, and how long did you cohabit before the marriage? What is the value of the house, and what is the equity? Is the house jointly owned? Presumably he is meeting all the mortgage payments. How big was the credit card debt when you split? Sorry to bombard, but this will all help with working things out in the long term :-)

Detroit wrote: »

You may still be able to get legal help for some aspects of divorce where domestic violence is involved. Contact CAB or a women's advisory service such as womens aid for sdvice.
CABx often have visiting solicitors who will give you a fixed time appointment, say 15mins, without charge to give you initial advice and check your eligibility for legal help.

If your income is low, you may be able to get HB for up to 26 weeks despite owning another property you don't live in, if you're trying to sell the property. Possibly for longer if your ex partner is living in the property.

Check out child maintenance options, the child support agency website for information on getting child support.

Advice on the debts can also be obtained from CAB.

Thank you for the advice that has been provided so far.

To answer the questions posed I will try and answer them as best as I can.

We were married for 11 years but didn't cohabit until six months after marriage. I think the equity in the house is about £50-£60k. The house is jointly owned and he is meeting the mortgage payments. The credit card debt is about £10k and about £5k of that was to pay off his business debt. Unfortunately I don't have any paperwork to show paying this off as he has all the business paperwork and his solicitor has asked me to provide evidence which obviously I can't. (He has a solicitor because he took me to court for custody of our son).

mikebusano

the good thing right now is that you are separated, its a whole lot level better than having an abusive husband.

now as you are moving on, you will encounter new people that will help you. go join a church and religious organizations or other social clubs that meet your interest. Other people will help with the healing.

Cheers, God bless you.