Diary of a shopaholic?

mandarinduck

Also - entered dozens of competitions. As stated above, freebies and wins are probably a better buzz!

Stephb1986_2

well done!

ive resisted the urge to spend all week because ive no money lol!

but my fella did buy me a tigger towel and teddy we're going on holiday on the 30th of this month so i need to save instead of spend. im not buying any new stuff for my holiday just wearing my not so new stuff instead

Peartree

Gosh it is so hard isn't it! It is interesting that this site is all about saving money but most of the forums are about spending (albeit getting the best deal for what you spend)! I often find that when I look at the forums it makes me want to go out and spend - the Boots threads in particular creates a bit of a red cloud that takes some overcoming. How many of those free No7 gift contents have I ended up giving to charity tombolas because I don't need or use the contents? Never mind the two things I bought just to get that free gift!

I pride myself on getting the best deal. I also really hate shopping as recreation - the idea of a day out shopping in Manchester, my nearest city, is my idea of hell. However, I do like just 'popping in somewhere on the way home to see what they've got'. It must be hereditary as my Mum often asks me 'did you get anything' - code for a bargain - when we speak in the evenings! Luckily 'nipping out at lunchtime' isn't an option for me for which I am grateful as it is a killer.

The problem is bargain shopping - by which I mean getting something really good quality for a good price and not getting 'cheap stuff for a cheap price' - is addictive. But it all adds up and in my experience it isn't the big purchases (which you tend to consider more) it is all the £10 and £20 bits and bobs that are the killers.

Getting older and worrying about the pension helps! I've been in a bit of debt on the credit cards and know that I had absolutely nothing to show for the money I had built up except the excitement of taking those carrier bags home! I ended up getting straight as a result of a tragedy in our family which resulted in a small inheritance. I flipping wasted what that precious person left to me by covering the bills for clothes I bought and wore once or twice! It was pretty sobering. Since then I am so proud of being someone who doesn't deal in credit and, in fact, saves and invests. It is a real buzz!

However, I'm a recovering spending addict and can't be considered an exemplary case but I would suggest the following:

- Read some of the other forums on this site and get some investments. You might start small but seeing them go up (OK not so much at the moment) can be just as addictive. You could spend that lunchtime on managing your investments. Look at what some people are doing about becoming mortgage free, and so on. It is really motivating. What could £2500 a year do to your mortgage?
- Think really seriously about your longer term dreams - say a trip around the world or whatever floats your boat. Weigh every purchase against that dream. Maybe get a piggy bank and every time you resist the urge to spend pop the money you have 'saved' into it.
- If you have disposable income you can't be trusted with, think about putting it out of reach at the beginning of the month. Set up a standing order to overpay your mortgage or put it into an ISA then watch it stack up.
- Don't buy magazines - they are all about the latest must have phone, fashion, they just bring out your 'grabby' side.
- Start thinking about quality, style and investment. A £20 pair of trousers in Dorothy Perkins is not a bargain - no disrespect to DP but it is buying a cheap thing cheap. A bargain is something which is, at a minimum, a 50% discount and something you actually need - and you also have to think about cost per wear. Plan your (work) wardrobe ahead - a classic pair of black trousers half price is a bargain and should be snapped up. This season's print smock is not, even at at 99% off!
- Bin the credit cards and just use a debit card. On other boards they will say set a budget and only use cash but it is a step to far for me!
- Find another use for your 'nipping out' time. Maybe use it for saving money on other things like changing your utilities, insurance, etc. Maybe do a course online? I know myself that spending is related to boredom. If I'm at a loose end in the evening I might just look at e-bay......

As I say, I'm not completely reformed. If you are addictive you are addictive so I'm working very hard on replacing one addiction with another. In my case, I'm trying to addict myself to saving not spending 0 but the M&S sale bill tells another story!

Good luck

Peartree

PS £238 on a phone - at the risk of sounding like your mother - are you out of your mind?!? Relate it to a monthly mortgage payment and think again!

mandarinduck

Wow just found this old post and am amazed at how much you can change in 3 years. I can't believe my attitude then: it was all about looking for something to perk me up and then feeling guilt about spending - a vicious circle. Looking back, I know it was a very difficult time and I was very unhappy. And £238 for a phone - well, don't know what I was thinking.

The lattes haven't stopped unfortunately (get one or two a week but as cheap as I can) but I do still walk wherever I can, saving me hundreds of pounds a year. I can't even remember why I needed sports bras and said rucksack. I've just done Christmas shopping and averaged £14 per person, even though some folks have multiple gifts. My husband and I have set reasonable limits on spending for each other's presents this year and I've still managed to get some good deals.

Funnily enough I got married this year and stuck to a very tight budget of £2500, including day do for 50 and evening do for 80, two buffets, gifts, sparkling wine etc. I bought tissue paper and a heart cutter rather than buying pre-cut hears from Confetti, I made my own favour bags. I got my wedding dress from Debenhams with 20% off and my husband wore a 'value' suit from M&S. We loved the day and the pictures (taken for free by a photographer friend as a wedding present) were great.

Only three years older but already so much wiser!

sweetcheeks33

i think i may be a shopaholic.... grrrr xx

7roland8

Read somewheere that women enjoy shopping and searching for a bargain as it is some sort of primeval programming from when we had to go searching for berries etc - finding the places where they were best etc.
So I think we all have it to a certaine xtent. I used to 'feed' it by taking a bag of stuff to charity shop - then maybe buying something small - so it wasn;t costing much and money went to charity as well. So I could have a 'treat' without sprnding too much.
Now I can see we can actually survive on very little - and we all have way too many clothes etc. Mind you I still treat myself to an occasional bag off ebay! But only around a £5.

jenniewb

Glad things have improved for you in the 3 years since you posted OP- May they continue to get better!

Thing which put ice on my spending was keeping a log of everything I spent on an excel sheet. I made it so it popped up to be filled each time I turned on my computer. I would fill it before visitng any other website. Hard and depressing but worked. Got me into a better pattern and proved to myself I could do it, I could cut back. Also prevented me over spending and if anything at all, breaking even instead of going further into debt.