Diary of a shopaholic?

mandarinduck

I deliberated a lot about a) whether to post this and b) where to post this before I decided that people will understand my dilemma.

Am I a shopaholic? I would certainly vehemently deny the accusation when faced with it and I'm certainly not in the shops every lunchtime browsing for new bits. BUT I have been known to 'shop until I drop' on the internet and whilst the bills are paid every month and we do save, I appreciate that possibly another £2500 could have gone into our savings this year than has. (Eugh - they say confession is good for the soul but this is hard!)

Every now and again I do try and make a concerted effort to be a dedicated saver but am always lured into 'oh well, it's only £20, it won't make that much of a dent'. Anyway, I have set up a budget for next year and it's tight. I know I'll need all the willpower I can get. So for the next few months, it's preparation time.

The problem is, I need moral support. I can say to my partner "Guess what, I resisted the urge to spend £45 today" but he just looks at me like I have sprouted another head and says "And?"

So i hope there are people here who understand and maybe are going through the same thing, so when I'm totally frank about what has/hasn't happened, it will ring bells with other people. I don't want to stop shopping - I like shopping - but I do want it to be a healthier experience. I don't want the guilt and I don't want to be hiding goods/credit card statements because I know I shouldn't have bought something. Whether we can afford it is not the issue - I want more discipline!

So... Week 1... Knew I needed a pair of trousers so went to Dorothy Perkins. Once in there thought "Hey, I just started a new job, why not splash out? £100 on some new office clothes won't break the bank!" [I have lots of clothes, just a shortage of trousers so this was very silly]. Managed to talk myself down and went to the till with two pairs at £20 each. At the last minute said, "Actually, I think I'll just take the one if that's OK." Spent £20 but managed to talk myself out of reckless overspending. Felt very relieved afterwards.

Spent all weekend talking myself out of getting a new phone. I would need to pay off my existing contract and even though they've been dreadful (:mad: ) am not sure it's worth the £238 it would cost me! Managed to resist and think about the long term picture. The shining Nokia still beckons but I'm trying to be sensible. It's just not worth it.

Am now working in the town centre so must be strong and resist nipping out at lunchtime. Have done my christmas shopping already and to a strict budget so have no real reasons to go shopping now. I think this is going to be hard. Am I a shopaholic? I love buying things and giving things so I guess the test will be, can I do it in moderation!

carol9uk

hi no what you mean, my boyfreind says i am a shopaholic, in boots mostly. i cant not get a bargain. i used to do the sunday bargain hunting every week but try not to and it getting better. will done with your shopping, it will get better. i have got no more room for xmas present and clothers, but cant fit in to many of my clothers at moment. i am sure you will be okay, just remember do it need it.

Sooler

mandarinduck wrote: »

Am I a shopaholic?

Just 'unwise' with money perhaps

mandarinduck wrote: »

I love buying things and giving things so I guess the test will be, can I do it in moderation!

Stop buying for the sake of buying , ‘urge to spend’ – seems it’s not that you want or need what you’re spending it on.

You say you like giving as a justification for your buying – you don’t need to buy to give - why not just give your money away? :huh:

Sooler

carol9uk wrote: »

hi no what you mean, my boyfreind says i am a shopaholic, in boots mostly. i cant not get a bargain.

How can it be a bargain if you buy stuff compulsively - surely a bigger bargain is to not buy it.

carol9uk wrote: »

i used to do the sunday bargain hunting every week but try not to and it getting better.

Isn't it just the same ol' tat week after week?


Take a step back and see what you can see.


People in shops are like fish - they walk around, usually aimlessly casting their eyes over the bait, every now and then one will bite and take something from the shelf and buy it - it's funny to watch :rotfl::rotfl::rotfl:


The stores just have to put the bait in a variety of different packaging/products to tempt as many fish as they can.

Charlies50

I can totally relate to all that you have said apart from the fact that I do not have as much disposable income left over.

I dont know whether it is more of a 'buzz' when I resist the temptation to buy or buying itself.

Good idea about the budget though. I may use this as a step forward in getting back on track with my own finances.

Well done on the Xmas presents. As ever I will be unprepared in December. :-)

Stephb1986_2

Everyone says im a shopaholic but i dont think i am.

Yes i do have 4 and a half wardrobes crammed with clothes some with tags on some only worn once i have a few pairs of shoes that ive not worn, i do like shopping and i can quite easily go into debenhams, next, dorothy perkins and spend £200 without even thinking. i have recently curbed my spending because my car had needed its tax and mot and such things, but im coming into some money soon and my mum is really worried that i will go and blast it all in a shopping trip. Am i really a spendaholic

Sooler

Stephb1986 wrote: »

Everyone says im a shopaholic but i dont think i am.

Yes i do have 4 and a half wardrobes crammed with clothes some with tags on some only worn once i have a few pairs of shoes that ive not worn, ... Am i really a spendaholic

Yes ... and a woman ... is there a diffference

Skint_Catt

How to stop the urge?

martin's motto: Do I want it, Do I need it, Can it wait?

Or give yourself 24 hours to think before purchasing ANYTHING.

Or to put you off come and read some of the stories on the Debt Free Wannabee board.

COOLTRIKERCHICK

i know where you are coming from too....

i used to be spend to make myself happy.. as soon as i got home.... i would sink deeper into depression knowing that i just added to the problem by spending more.....

i then i found mse.....:j

and i found i got the same buzz getting the freebies ....doing the old r & r's in tescos....lol..


now i also get the same urge to save.....its a matter of turning the tables..... so to speak...

why dont you .try looking for freebies.....on the internet ( and the freebie board)

and looking for loopholes etc...... it is very addictive.... abit like spending money

Joto_2

I'm also trying to curb my impulse buys and I think I may be winning. This year I left all the tags on until I wore the item. Going back into the wardrobe after that urge to buy 'because it was a bargain ' had gone I found I could evaluate whether I wanted/needed the item or not. I bought several items in Marks before my holiday (for my holiday) and 1/2 of them weren't even packed. The ones I did take went into my case with the tags on! Not surprising I went back with several items to be refunded when we came back.
I'm also trying to buy the item I really like rather than the one that's ok because it's in a sale - anyone else have this problem?

mandarinduck

It was a mixed week last week. I managed to resist a number of impulses, though I did use my new commitment to walking to work as an excuse to buy some new trainers. At least I will offset that spending by the bus fare I'm saving and I got them for £35 instead of £70 so will pay for them in a couple of weeks of walking!

Gave in to the urge to buy three lattes but found somewhere to get them for £1.15 instead of £1.85 so only spent £3.45 instead of £5.55. Am setting myself a two a week limit though and have bought a jar of instant coffee to have at work instead. Let's see if I can knock it down to one a week and then none...

Needed (yes needed!) to buy two sports bras and a rucksack. Was dismayed to find it was looking to cost £80 in some places. Managed to get two sports bras, a backpack, two jumpers and a t-shirt for £48 in a discount store. Could probably have done without the jumpers and t-shirt though, so not a massive victory.

Worse splurge of the week was £30 on CDs on Friday to 'celebrate the end of my first working week'. Within an hour of buying them I realised this was yet again another excuse. I will listen to all 6 CDs but I think I could probably have settled with 2 if I had to get any.

Resisted: new phone contract still, more work clothing that I don't need, a daily latte (see above) in favour of two per week, extra perks on the weekly shop, buying lunch instead of making it.

Verdict: spent more than I should this week but less than I could have! A little step but more needed.