Deutsche Bank toxic derivative losses

Malthusian

John_G_Jones wrote: »

Go on then, how would DB’s failure hurt other banks?

Every single deal they have on with other banks will b collateralised, with daily margin calls set at a zero threshold.

What’s the route to them contaminating anyone else?

Ok, so this is how it works.

Whenever a bank issues a derivative, they send a banker to the local synagogue who lifts up a hidden trapdoor and makes his way into the underground tunnels where the elders live.

The elders make a little model of whatever the underlying asset is out of clay, chant "KLAATU VERATA NICTU" and infuse the clay model with a few drops of the blood of Christian babies. Then they issue a certificate of ownership for the model.

The banker brings the clay model back to head office where it is stored on a shelf in Deutsche Bank's headquarters. The certificate meanwhile can be traded on the markets. As long as Deutsche Bank remains solvent and no-one touches the clay model that gives the derivative substance, everything is fine.

The problem is that Deutsche Bank has so many of these clay models that the Frankfurt skyscraper in which they're kept was never designed to bear that much weight.

If Deutsche Bank's headquarters fall over then all the clay models will be smashed to pieces and the ghosts of the Christian babies will fly out and wreak a terrible vengeance on whichever bank is holding the derivative contract at that particular moment.

The entire global financial system will be buried under a mountain of ectoplasmic baby poop.

It says so on YouTube so it must be true.

AG47

Malthusian wrote: »

Ah, "green shoots". A phrase most recently used by Baroness Vadera in 2009, for which she was roundly mocked and criticised. She said she saw "green shoots of recovery" at almost the exact bottom of the market (January 2009), and she was proved 100% correct by the ensuing 9-years-and-counting bull market.

Previously it was used by Norman Lamont in October 1991, again to much criticism. The 1990-91 recession ended that very quarter, proving Lamont 100% correct.

I don't advocate market timing, but if there's a recession and/or stockmarket crash on, and you have a load of cash which you're scared of putting into the market, and

1) a politician says they see "green shoots"
2) everyone else in politics and the media crucifies them for being delusional / out of touch,

past performance says that it's time to bash on the wine gums.

If "green shoots" was supposed to suggest delusional optimism, I think you need a better phrase.

The funniest headline I have ever seen in my life.

Duetcher bank tells shareholders not to worry about 47 trillion in derivatives:rotfl:

DaveandMayu

Deutsche Bank CEO states they are ready for ANY Brexit Scenario...as long as it is delayed for a long, long time!

Otherwise they are completely screwed...and so is the rest of the Global Financial System!

Deutsche Bank is NOT Ready for Brexit Scenarios! (Bix Weir)
https://youtu.be/NpweJ0S6_LY



It's so unbelievable they want to merge DB with a non German bank to try and get another country to bail out the 50 trillion derivatives

antrobus

DaveandMayu wrote: »

..

Deutsche Bank is NOT Ready for Brexit Scenarios! (Bix Weir)
https://youtu.be/NpweJ0S6_LY
...

That would be the work of some dipstick that wants to "take down the banking cabal" and return to the gold standard.

Posting links to a known conspiracy nutjob doesn't reflect well,:)

Thrugelmir

michaels wrote: »

At the time there was a lot of discussion about whether it was a liquidity problem or one of solvency. Problem is once you are illiquid and can only borrow at punitive interest rates then you are also insolvent.

Lehmans also was allowed to go bust before the UK sector was saved by Mr Brown. Wasn't till long after that it was revealed that the Treasury lent HBOS £25 billion prior to the formal merger with Lloyds . I doubt the rights offer to raise capital would have been so well supported by investors if they had known.

DaveandMayu

antrobus wrote: »

That would be the work of some dipstick that wants to "take down the banking cabal" and return to the gold standard.

Posting links to a known conspiracy nutjob doesn't reflect well,:)

This guy has been in the banking sector for decades he makes a lot of sense

https://youtu.be/xOfTHnTw3m8

John_G_Jones

AG47 wrote: »

The funniest headline I have ever seen in my life.

Duetcher bank tells shareholders not to worry about 47 trillion in derivatives:rotfl:

Do you mean Deutsche Bank?

Whichever bank you were trying to spell, they are right, there’s no reason to worry.

If I and my neighbour each have an iou in a billion pounds against each other there is no net risk at all for any of us. It’s the same with most derivatives, the risk is bilateral, or circular. Banks use services such as trioptima to unwind these closed loops by shutting down deals, but it takes time, and there’s no real rush as, as explained to you a few times now, the net risk is not so large.

John_G_Jones

DaveandMayu wrote: »

This guy has been in the banking sector for decades he makes a lot of sense

https://youtu.be/xOfTHnTw3m8

I don’t agree, he’s a conspiracy theorist repeating the same old tropes against bankers.

antrobus

John_G_Jones wrote: »

I don’t agree, he’s a conspiracy theorist repeating the same old tropes against bankers.

Oh, it's worse than that.

Here's the Road to Roota Theory.
http://www.roadtoroota.com/public/190.cfm

Apparently the USA has vast natural resources that have been hidden away for years in National Parks, Military Bases, etc, and there is similarly a vast array of new energy technologies that have been hidden away.

It's slightly less crazy than David Icke's theory that we are ruled by an inter-dimensional race of reptilian beings, But not by much.

AG47

Farmer_Johnson wrote: »

You think that the banks were given fifty trillion?

Where do you get such an idea from, as it’s clearly not true?

The fifty trillion is all derivatives, sprang into existence from thin air

Deutsche bank is the most dangerous bank in the world.
1st Feb they have to release last quarter results, they can no longer hide the mass losses.

If even JPMorgan had huge losses last quarter then what about the toxic Deutsche bank the most dangerous bank in the world because it's so interconnected?