Loosing Motivation

a_silver_lining

Hi all,

I'm not sure if it's all this rainy weather bringing me down but I am about three weeks into trying to be better with my finances and pay down debt and I have lost a lot of motivation... so much in so I just booked a holiday on a whim. I did feel terrible afterwards, especially as I had to redo my repayment checklist as I cross of squares for each £100 saved or paid off. I ended up wiping my emergency fund from 1800 to 1150.

This checky square list was to help me break the large amount of 8k debt (originally 10k) into smaller chunks as I thought that would help motivate me. I'm wondering if one of my issues is that I have set up a direct debit of £250 into my emergency fund monthly and £250 off my debt and so have become complacent about the rest of the money I could stop myself spending monthly in order to pay the debt down faster. My plan was in February (the month before I'm turning 30) to have paid off 4250/10k and then have another 2k in my emergency fund to pay it down to 6/10k which feels more manageable. Ideally I was hoping to save my excess money to pay it even further down but I'm realising that is unlikely.... truthfully if I had cut my spending down enough, not booked the holiday and stopped my diy this summer I could have been debt free at 30 with a real push.

I've written a list for money saving ideas over the weekend and to sell some bits to help subsidise my holiday... I can't understand why the stress of the debt isn't enough to motivate me.

Help!

nkkingston

The problem is stress is never motivational. As long as your debt is a source of stress (and let's be honest, it's never going to be a source of joy!) it's going to be hard to get any motivation by looking it square in the eye. You need to look for motivation in other places.

Is your debt one lump sum, or is it made up of lots of little debts? Though the sensible thing is to pay the highest interest debt of first, often it can help motivation to tackle some of the small ones, so you can sit back at the end of the month and say "that's the Capital One card completely cleared, now for the Very account!"

Your signature celebrates spending 10 years of saving on a house. What do you want to spend the next ten years worth of savings on? What would motivate you to put that money aside and to chip away at your debt? Think charity fundraising thermometer going up, up, up, not black pit of debt swallowing your money down. Personally, i wouldn't get stuck on the idea the savings will go into paying off the debt: you might as well put that money into paying off the debt now and save yourself a bit of interest if that's all it's going to be for. Get an emergency fund put aside, then really break down your saving goal into pieces, so when you look at that £250 direct debit going out of the account you can think "that's the new sink for my bathroom" or "that's half of next year's trip to Barcelona".

msgnomey

Don't beat yourself up over it, take a breath, figure out what you can learn from the slip up, and move forward with your head held high xx

Spoonhead88

You can do it, no one succeeds without stumbling once in awhile.

tealady

Hi
Don't beat yourself up too much about this. As long as the debt is being reduced it's up to you how fast you do it. We all need treats to help us cope (this month I have had to "rein in" some of my budget due to overspending on treats). When I was in debt I felt I wanted to Iive a little rather than just exist and if that meant my debt free date was a bit further away then I accepted that was the compromise.
HTH

louby40

It's a marathon not a race - maybe with a few hurdles (to slow you down) along the way

VeronicaMars

nkkingston wrote: »

Is your debt one lump sum, or is it made up of lots of little debts? Though the sensible thing is to pay the highest interest debt of first, often it can help motivation to tackle some of the small ones, so you can sit back at the end of the month and say "that's the Capital One card completely cleared, now for the Very account!"

YES TO THIS!!! :heartsmil

I also struggled with motivation. I knew what I SHOULD do but it didn't help. I then started with my smallest cc balances and started gradually paying down my overdraft (what should have been my last debt) because I HATED it! I called it the "human nature plan of action" not the most sensible plan but what worked with my personality. :rotfl:

I found it really motivational to start closing off accounts (and then immediately calling up and closing that account) or each month I would call up on payday and reduce my overdraft limit by the allocated amount that month so I could not go back into it - even if it was only £50.:money:

I also (quite randomly) used to have a ritual where, on pay day, I would go to my bank, withdraw my savings (in cash) and then walk to my other bank and pay in the savings to my ISA and ask for a mini statement. Yes, I could have went online and transferred it but it became a ritual and exciting and I would look at my statement for days looking at how much my balance was increasing. I would also make my overdraft phone call and then buy myself a nice lunch that day! :EasterBun

a_silver_lining

nkkingston wrote: »

The problem is stress is never motivational. As long as your debt is a source of stress (and let's be honest, it's never going to be a source of joy!) it's going to be hard to get any motivation by looking it square in the eye. You need to look for motivation in other places.".

Nkkingston your reply really struck a chord with me. Stress has always resulted in a decline in my mental health, so why I would think it beneficial for motivating me I don't know!

My debt is one big one to a family member I am no longer close to. There is no major pressure or timeframe set, but our falling out a few months back coupled with a possible future reduction in income had stressed me and motivated me initially to start paying it off. If they turned around and demanded it back I would be unable to fulfil that.

It's also interesting as having my own home and the security it would offer me was always a massive motivator, but I've honestly not got a one, five or ten year plan now. I'm going to do a bit of thinking around what that may look like... I know I would like to travel so maybe setting a timeframe would help. Maybe, if debt is paid by x date then I can save by x date and leave to travel for a year on x date. It's interesting as I already feel motivated within seconds to save for this exciting trip, but the hurdle of paying back debt fills my stomach with dread not joy. So maybe a balance of debt paying and saving would work, the passive £500 pm could go entirely on debt repayment once my emergency fund is back in place and then the money I am able to earn or save in addition can go towards my future goal as this excitement is where my motivation is found.

a_silver_lining

Thank you everyone some really kind and supportive replies. I really appreciate it as if I tried to talk about my fears and worries about having debt to people in my life I would most likely (actually have been) met with blank faces. It's nice to be somewhere where I can talk about this important part of my life.

Veronica Mars I love your little rituals. Building on my thoughts from Nkkingston's reply I'm thinking opening a separate saving account from my emergency fund and physically taking out the unspent money for the month and putting it into a savings account could feel really good. It might work for me to stop spending too, if I'm thinking ooo I could just spend this £5 on cake out with a friend, or £20 on a takeaway, or £15 on plants to go to a cash point and take it out and pay it into my savings instead! I do think this will only work if I know I'm paying the £500pm off my debts...

As long as my income stays the same...16 months to be debt free at £500pm, roughly October 2017... I'm going to mull on that a while...

in_need_of_direction

I find that dealing in cash makes money more real for me. Also, do you really need an emergency fund of £6k?

[Deleted User]

Have you taken the holiday yet?

If not, can you cancel it, and get some of the money back?