Do I go for an IVA, OR payment plan etc..£60.000in debt.HELP!!!

charliec_3

:money: Please do not judge to much, been in debt for 12 yrs, the least I owed was £1500, now at £60.000...
My husbands take home pay is £1900 I work partime cash in hand of £75 per week, plus child benifit £63 and £40 tax credits.

I have a Loan of approx £25,000, (per month £267), another at £20.000 (per month £476) 3 x Credit cards at £10,000,(per month £250) 2 x cars £10,000 (per month £320), plus £35 for mobiles, £400 Food, £80 Car insurance, £30 House insurance, £27 Gas, £20 electric, no WATER rates though (in army) Pet insurance £10 Charites £10, mess bills army £50 Rent comes out automatically as does council tax, have the other naughty luxeries like bt £28 and on option 1, sky £40 and broadband. £17,


We purchased a house and added a together loan on top to consolidate all debts, which is the £25,000 loan above, taken over 25 years, thats why its low, but I sold it and went back to army because i could not afford it, the rest is just so complicated to get into to, but basically we borrowed from peter to pay Paul, We cant sell one of the cars as it has negative equity, but can hand it back at xmas, so thats a slight improvement, I just don't know where to go to next, my man only got a few yr left in army, would love to afford our own home, but no possible with the above, getting on a list is difficult, dont know what to do.
Have looked at IVA, but so scared, debt managment plan seems ok, but huge ammount of work, had an informal chat, and could take 17 years to pay off for our stupidity and wants, I have hit the world with a massive bump, contimpalted jumping off a cliff, robbing a bank and blowing £5000 on scratchcards....stuck in this viscious circle and now on the wine to help me sleep, want to cry, and I know its our own doing, lloyds tsb love me, yes have a loan yes lets give her a £15,000 limit, yes have a £1500 overdrft, opps forgot to mention that,
Feel like I am at an AA meeting, because I have admitted to myself what I already know, Im selfish and want nice things now.
Straying off subject . So you super guys and girls, whats your advice, can I flit abroad and come back in 5 yrs?, sorry trying to make light of a horrible situation, I think I know what you may say.
Look forward to reading your responses and making some changes for a better future

loobyloo1980

charliec wrote:

Please do not judge to much, been in debt for 12 yrs, the least I owed was £1500, now at £60.000...
My husbands take home pay is £1900 I work partime cash in hand of £75 per week, plus child benifit £63 and £40 tax credits.

I have a Loan of approx £25,000, (per month £267), another at £20.000 (per month £476) 3 x Credit cards at £10,000,(per month £250) 2 x cars £10,000 (per month £320), plus £35 for mobiles, £400 Food, £80 Car insurance, £30 House insurance, £27 Gas, £20 electric, no WATER rates though (in army) Pet insurance £10 Charites £10, mess bills army £50 Rent comes out automatically as does council tax, have the other naughty luxeries like bt £28 and on option 1, sky £40 and broadband. £17,


We purchased a house and added a together loan on top to consolidate all debts, which is the £25,000 loan above, taken over 25 years, thats why its low, but I sold it and went back to army because i could not afford it, the rest is just so complicated to get into to, but basically we borrowed from peter to pay Paul, We cant sell one of the cars as it has negative equity, but can hand it back at xmas, so thats a slight improvement, I just don't know where to go to next, my man only got a few yr left in army, would love to afford our own home, but no possible with the above, getting on a list is difficult, dont know what to do.
Have looked at IVA, but so scared, debt managment plan seems ok, but huge ammount of work, had an informal chat, and could take 17 years to pay off for our stupidity and wants, I have hit the world with a massive bump, contimpalted jumping off a cliff, robbing a bank and blowing £5000 on scratchcards....stuck in this viscious circle and now on the wine to help me sleep, want to cry, and I know its our own doing, lloyds tsb love me, yes have a loan yes lets give her a £15,000 limit, yes have a £1500 overdrft, opps forgot to mention that,
Feel like I am at an AA meeting, because I have admitted to myself what I already know, Im selfish and want nice things now.
Straying off subject . So you super guys and girls, whats your advice, can I flit abroad and come back in 5 yrs?, sorry trying to make light of a horrible situation, I think I know what you may say.
Look forward to reading your responses and making some changes for a better future

First of all, well done on fessing up your sins.

I don't judge, as I am in debt (not as much) for pretty much the same reasons - love spending, hate saving etc etc. I am finding it very very hard to change my lifestyle and habits to get things paid off.

I don't know much about IVAs, but have you considered going bankrupt? I know it is stigma, but you get discharged in about a year now, and then that is it - clean slate.

If I were in more debt, I would consider it.

Post your full budget for us to look at, income and ALL outgoings so we cna see where you could cut down. £400 for food is a lot of money, how many kids have you? That is something I was advised to reduce straight away when I first visited here. I have 2 kids and was told £150 was ample (although I'm yet to manage to do it for less than £250). Also full sky package is a luxury, can you now trim down to the £19.50 one or get freeview/top up tv??

Good luck

charliec_3

Your right, the food bill high, but tried to include ciggies and beer, have only one child, but you do get used to a certain lifestyle, just trying to change at baby step paces, Worried about this bankrupt, as army would then get involved and that would not be good as he is high ranking, even we make mistakes. a more detailed account of spending habits will follow, just my brain knakered with numbers

charliec_3

P.s just had sky plus upgrade, i know its a massive luxury, but tht is the only thing in my life i need, when i say to myself £1.33 per day, that seems better

loobyloo1980

I know what you mean, Sky is only social luxury we have too, as we don't smoke or go out drinking more than a couple of times a year.

I see what you mean about army and bankruptcy - difficult one. Could you not try for help from any of the charities that help army families? Just a thought.

Also have you been to CAB or spoken to anyone else? When I was at my lowest point over my debts I lost my job as a result, and was very depressed. I went o CAB and the relief when someone took over my affairs was indescribable. It may be worth an appointment with someone. It really helps, and they will be able to advise you properly about IVAs and their payment plan advice and help is free.

Spilt your food figure up into its different chunks, and put fags and booze separate, and cleaning stuff. Just so people get a proper idea of each expense. Trust me, its more helpful for people to help you that way (if that even makes sense)

loobyloo1980

charliec wrote:

Your right, the food bill high, but tried to include ciggies and beer, have only one child, but you do get used to a certain lifestyle, just trying to change at baby step paces, Worried about this bankrupt, as army would then get involved and that would not be good as he is high ranking, even we make mistakes. a more detailed account of spending habits will follow, just my brain knakered with numbers

Yes, you do get used to a lifestyle, and changing it is the hardest thing coz you feel deprived of your usual things. I have never had to go without anything before, and find it very hard to have to budget. I wasn't a spoilt brat as a child, but we always had what we needed, and it was always good stuff. I guess I just do the same now myself, but haven't quite got the income to do it with.

charliec_3

Loobyloo, Thanks for support, I feel 5% better, trouble with CAB is no one ever there near me or the bloody queue is shocking, My life is soo structured, fitting time to sort this money mess is unbelievable, I will try and sleep and then do a proper structure of all my in goings and out goings. I Wish I had more support from my partner, but he is never here, always on tour, and you get to a point where you think problems gonna go away, head in sand, I feel like blowing a few grand on clothes and a holiday and thinking so what I can, but might feel good for half an hour, then its back to OMG what now!, sob sob, I hate it, I spent it so I need to deal with it.
Like you I had nothing as a child, lots of love and playdoh, making things from loo rolls, the good old days, ok will sign off and get back to it tomorrow.
Good night Looby Tx xxx

loobyloo1980

ok, take care and keep coming on here for support. I have found it helpful just to see others in the same boat, so I know its not just me. I don't want to sound funny, but I went through a phase where I couldn't stop spending and wanted that buzz from getting new stuff. I was actually crying out for help and was later told I was suffering depression, possible postnatal. Is it possible that the stresses and strains of being an army wife and the lack of support are getting you down? My hubby is ex-army hun, so I know what it is like to be on your own, especially hard with a kiddie as well.

If you want a shoulder to winge on, private message me and I will give you my personal email to keep in touch.

Magentasue

I'm not judging you but ... I get the feeling you want things to change without giving too much stuff up! I really think you need to contact CCCS or National Debtline (links at top of this page - loads of stuff on their websites) to discuss options of bankruptcy etc.

Meanwhile, don't you think some of your money that you are spending on yourselves should go to reducing your debt? These would be my suggestions (I know they will seem harsh and I know you mentioned baby steps but it seems it needs more than that)

charliec wrote:

:money: Please do not judge to much, been in debt for 12 yrs, the least I owed was £1500, now at £60.000...
My husbands take home pay is £1900 I work partime cash in hand of £75 per week, plus child benifit £63 and £40 tax credits. (roughly 2300)

• I have a Loan of approx £25,000, (per month £267), another at £20.000 (per month £476) 3 x Credit cards at £10,000,(per month £250) 2 x cars £10,000 (per month £320), plus £35 for mobiles, £400 Food, £80 Car insurance, £30 House insurance, £27 Gas, £20 electric, no WATER rates though (in army) Pet insurance £10 Charites £, mess bills army £50 Rent comes out automatically as does council tax, have the other naughty luxeries like bt £28 and on option 1, sky £40 and broadband. £17,
• Roughly £1000 debt repayments
• Cars £400 (+ MOT/Maintenance/Car Tax) - can you sell them and share one runaround? Just noticed you can't
  
• Essentials (rent, house insurance,gas, elec, £15 phone) £150
• Food - cut down to £120 a month? (save £280 a month)
  
• Ditch Sky, Broadband (use library), mobiles, pet insurance, charity sub (save £135 a month)
  

Really - get rid of the Sky and mobiles - you'll only miss them to start with. Check out Moneysaving Old Style for ways to cut your food spending. Cut your cards up, give yourself cash for housekeeping. Pay your bills, pay yourself (a reasonable amount but as little as you can be comfortable on) and then throw everything at the debt. If you can't do that then you need help to negotiate with your creditors.

charliec_3

I know your trying to help and harsh is proabably what I need,
Thankyou for your honesty, will seriously look into all your suggestions.
Kindest regards

Malestrom

The first thing that we need is a proper budget. Its the cornerstone of any serious debt problem like yours. I know, we owe £50,000 for much the same reasons as you and are now repaying via a DMP at £600 per month, which will take us 7 years. A DMP is good as the interest is usually frozen and everything is budgeted when the DMP is arranged, so there's not really any reason to get into a mess again.

You're going to have to make some serious lifestyle changes though and you have to ackowledge this. Cutting Down and Cutting Out is where it's at. Post a full budget and we'll show you where and how to make the savings. Budget planner is at the top of the page in the blue bar.