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This probably sounds ridiculous...
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Try using thus http://www.moneysavingexpert.com/family/stop-spending-budgeting-tool#budget
It will tell you how long you have to work to earn that Costa coffee or McDonald's. It's very scarey
The other thing you could do is to put your debts into a snowball calculator and compare the date you'd be clear of those debts a) using the money you currently spend on these treats on the debts and b) without using that money.
If going cold turkey scares you why not initially reduce the amount of times you visit and put the money in a jar so you can visualise it? A friend of mine did this when she gave up smoking and this was far more useful as a motivator.0 -
immynjoesmum wrote: »I am aware how silly this sounds, however I'm really struggling to stop spending money on silly things like going to Costa/McDonald's etc.
I don't think it sounds silly at all.. we all have our weak spots. I think that's why we're all lurking here. My weakness is/was mags/coffee shops/toiletries.. but you can slowly take control back again... try and reduce the number of times you go slowly and gradually.. If you go cold turkey, you don't want to risk a blow out. Can you buy a nice jar of coffee/cafetierre at home.. and maybe substitute one of the times you go.. and then work down.
I used to buy a costa every day at work.. about £20 a week for one person.. I don't buy any coffee now and I am a coffee addict. Make them at home and take to work in a coffee mug. I buy a nice jar of coffee and that's my compromise. £5 a jar which lasts a month rather than my daily splurge.. and now I can't bear the thought of buying a coffee shop coffee
I think that you can cut back completely on some items but you need to allow yourself a treat every so often. Good luck!!Debt outstanding [STRIKE]£3491.[/STRIKE] £3303
NSD 10/150 -
Don't carry extra cash with you when you go out, leave cards at home.loose does not rhyme with choose but lose does and is the word you meant to write.0
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I think you need to just budget. You need to tell your money where to go, rather than spending it and then looking back on where it's gone. Check out something like YNAB. But it only works if you meticulously stick to it. I quite like a nice coffee when I'm out and about, so I sympathise there, so why not budget for it? It means something else you spend money on will have to be sacrificed though, as you can't spend money on everything.
Other than that, try to convince yourself that these places are just chain stores designed to make as much profit as possible.October 2015 = -13242.16 DFD 28/10/2016 £0 :T0 -
Hi Immy
Don't beat yourself up. As someone else pointed out we all have our weaknesses.
Recording your spending is an excellent idea, it does help when you see it all written down. It gives you a jolt to see how much money you can simply fritter away on nothing.
I think though, the problem really is about what to do in school holidays. I think it might be worth thinking ahead and getting organised. You will have half term in May and then the big summer one.
How old are your children - I'm guessing quite young if they are still at the running around stage.
start planning now.
A good one is to hide some of their toys. You put aside some toys, books and games for a few months and bring them out again later. To your children it wil feel like they have new toys.
Start buying a few bits to put aside - arty/crafty stuff, cheap puzzles and games/new balls sports equipment like cheap tennis rackets/cricket bats, cheap kites. Places like B&M £ shops do all that kind of thing. A bottle of bubbles costs pennies and littlies love them.
Start looking in charity shops for books, games, DVDs etc and out them on one side for the holidays so that they have some new things to play with.
Start a dressing up box.
Have theme days ......where you "live and eat like an Italian", get the kids to dress the table making Italian flags and place mats out of paper and cardboard. get them to "help" prepare Italian food. You all have to dress "like an Italian". Maybe learn a couple of words, play some appropriate music.
You can do this with any nationality. Mexican fiesta, Chinese, Bollywood.......
Have a morning exercise session - lots of DVDs out there or The Wii if you have one.
Start thinking about picnic stuff, flasks, rugs etc so you can spend days in the park, beach etc.
Look at the local library - see if they have any schemes you can join in.
Start a small change jar and save what you can for treats.
Start stocking up the freezer with ice creams and treats.
Start buying extra bits of food - my kids ate me out of house and home during the holidays. :rotfl:
You sound as if you might be feeling a bit isolated during school holidays - are there any mums you can get together with. Every so often some if the other mums and I would get together for a big picnic in a local park. It was great fun for the kids to play together and the mums could have company whilst the kids played.
You could theme them. Ie Teddy Bears Picnic, Pirates etc. You could include things like a cricket match, or game of football, or a treasure hunt.
Can you look out for vouchers for days out.
For rainy days you need to find ways to amuse, Indoor "camping" - sheets thrown chairs and tables - quizzes, jigsaw puzzles, making and doing sessions, baking and cooking, story time, "movie afternoons" with their favourite film,ice creams and popcorn.
It's hard work keeping children amused and entertained for 6 weeks. Throwing money at it isn't the best way forward - it gets expensive and it teaches them that you can only have fun if you spend money.....not the lesson we want to teach the next generation.
Getting back to coffee. I agree buy yourself some of your favourite coffee and maybe a flask. I always have nice coffee at home. I recently went to a costa coffee shop for a latte. I left half of it, not a patch on my own home brewed coffee..........0 -
Thanks everyone, some great ideas. I kick myself afterwards as I know we can't really afford to be doing it. I definitely need to start being more organised, not just for the holidays but for when I'm working as well.
I was at uni up until last summer, and have only been working since November, before then I had always been at home with the children. They are 8 and 9. I'm struggling to find a balance and need to seriously think about some quick easy teas rather than spending money on either takeaways or Mcdonald's. I have depression and anxiety too, and sometimes everything just gets too much! Next week is my first week of working 5 days, I've only been doing 3 days a week up until now, so I need to prepare myself now as things are only going to get worse if I don't address them.0 -
We don't have a Waitrose, however I have just remembered that we have a Booths supermarket that apparently has a loyalty card with free coffees as a perk (there is probably a catch but I will investigate!). It is just next door to the park as well so perfect0
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I used to do this but with things like picture frames and stuff for the house so I made a motto " If I cant eat it, don't buy it" This wouldn't help in your case. My advice will differ from the comments above and would be to take cash and leave cards at home. Then you can't overspend and if its just a little bit of cash you have on you, you can buy the odd Costa but not Costa plus whatever. This will help you save more/spend less and you won't feel depressed and sanctioned as able to purchase the odd treat. Good luck0
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Well, as someone who has paid off a lot of debt & also lost a lot of weight, I would say that 'willpower' is a really unhelpful concept. Stop thinking about willpower & whether you have any or not & think instead about choices.
When you are next heading through the door at Costa's, that is a conscious choice. At that stage you can make another choice. Ask yourself which choice you honestly prefer. Is it a) A pretty expensive cup of coffee & maybe an equally expensive cake orTo have that money still in your purse to buy something essential or to pay off one of your debts. If you want to get out of debt badly enough, your choice will be
. But the point I"m making is that it is about personal choice. I say this not in judgement as for years I told people I had zero willpower with money or weightloss but it was actually down to the fact that when faced with a food or money choice, I consistently chose the option which kept me a size 26 woman with lots of debt!! Am now Size 16 & budget properly every month. You CAN do it if you understand that lots of your little habitual choices will need to change. Good luck!
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2) To read 100 books (36/100) 3) The Shrinking of Foxgloves 5.9kg/30kg
"Life can only be understood backwards but it must be lived forwards" (Soren Kirkegaard 1813-55)0 -
Hi just to say not at all silly.
If you want a treat or pick me up with the kids now you are dealing with your debt - how about some cheap at home baking and making?
You can make your own cookies or even chocolate nests for pennies then they get a treat and they SO love it!
Making your own playdough is great fun too - old style board has lots of tips like this.
Most of all - you can do this. At times its not fun but when you know the stress of not worrying about debt is gone somehow everything else just seems 100's of times better. Good luck!
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