Confident

matt10001

How do you become more confident when dealing with people face to face or over the phone? Could someone give me some advice. Can you get sacked for not being confident?

Super_Whiskey

Taking a deep breath so it'll allow you think about what you're going to do/say. If you're asking this question then it's fairly obvious to assume that you don't have the gift of the gab so depending on what field you work in, do what you can to become more knowledgeable in what your company does. And if you don't know something then say 'I don't know but I'll find out for you' as people can smell b.s. a mile away.

*katie*

Not very helpful but I think a lot of it just comes with practice and doing it every day.

I have found making notes for difficult phone conversations helpful in the past.

What job are you doing? I would imagine for most jobs you would have to be very, very bad for a continued period for management to ask you to leave. Maybe for some roles such as in sales or recruitment I would image managers to be less tolerant. I am a very socially anxious person and with a bit of practice I have been just fine in a number of customer service jobs

xapprenticex

getting used to doing it basically. Exposure.

and understanding that nobody cares about you (as in how you speak on the phone etc), we all think about ourselves, whats on TV tonight, what we are eating later etc etc.

kingfisherblue

I used to lack confidence to such an extent that I couldn't make eye co intact - not great when you work in a customer facing role. I worked in a bookshop, and a popular book at the time was 'A woman in your own right' by Anne Dickson. I bought a copy, and tried some of the techniques. One that I remember is lifting your chin slightly and making eye contact. I gained a lot from reading the book and am a lot more confident now.

Google shows that Anne Dickson has a website - it might be worth a look.

xapprenticex

isnt it a book aimed at women though? or from a woman's perspective?

Something like this may be of use: (too)

http://www.amazon.co.uk/Anxiety-Rebalance-Answers-Overcome-Depression-ebook/

SharpShooter

They cant sack you for not being confident. But you and the employer should take active steps to address this- maybe a lack of knowledge in you work?

They can sack you for underperformance etc.

Nebulous2

I've known sales people who will go through dozens of difficult / abusive phonecalls to get a sale. They had the ability to put it aside and move on, assuming the next call would be the one. Very few people are able to do that consistently, most of them let it bother them sooner rather than later.

Practice will help. Feeling comfortable in your environment also helps.

One tip for phonecalls is to stand up. Apparently we sound more confident standing than seated.

agrinnall

Without knowing what your job is and what sort of calls these are (incoming/outgoing, sales/advice/support, etc.) it's difficult to be too specific.

[Deleted User]

matt10001 wrote: »

How do you become more confident when dealing with people face to face or over the phone? Could someone give me some advice. Can you get sacked for not being confident?

Yes of course you can be sacked for lack of confidence. Although this normally happens pretty quick to be fair, if people get to know you then very possibly they are just sometimes a bit more understanding. I recall seeking my GP's help one time last summer, who suggested I had nothing more than a confidence issue, after a job of 5 days terminated so perhaps that is a source open to you.

Lets put it this way - if you don't make phone calls and let the customer call to find out any problems you could just be making it worse for yourself. (That's how I play it presently)

Measuring yourself - perhaps against someone else or a competitor already doing job can sometimes help.
Or taking a job you would hate even more to pull you to your senses, sometimes can work a treat, imagine that proper confidence building.

Anyway..To think I nearly got persuaded to give up on my career path, doesn't bear thinking about 8 months on - get back on the horse as quickly as you fall off definitely I say! If you think you need more training/coaching then don't be afraid to ask.

Kayalana99

I've been sacked for lack of confidence, my first job out of school was an apprenticeship with a telemarketing company - I was supposed to be a P/A but what they really wanted was someone who would be a cheap wage on the phones.

They soon worked out that whilst I was good at the admin side of things - I was awful on the phone, I never had confidence around people and phone calls even to this day scare me.

Honestly, I don't have much advice but it did get better with age, I'm now nearly 25 and I've battled (myself) with my social issues for years, always telling myself what's the point as I was happy with my family and small friends group so didn't see the need to improve it but early last year I picked up a camera for the first time and it changed my life - it wasn't that I become a more confident person it was that I finally had a purpose to come out of my shell.

Now I work in wedding photography - I HAD to come out my shell, I have to speak to people on the phone, I have to meet people (I was physically shaking for my first meeting that the client actually asked me if I was ok and started going on about her own social issues and how she understood) I have to shout at people (sometimes ) on the wedding day during group shots and take control of situations.

Maybe it's not much help, but when you find your "reason" to push yourself out of your shell - I'm sure you will.

I suppose one piece of advice is repetition - the first time I did a client meeting I was shaking dreadfully, the 2nd I was only shaking slightly and my voice was shaking but I plowed through and concentrated on them and by the 3rd time I had calmed down a lot on my initial nerves..one thing that is getting better but I still have even now is every time I start walking up to a clients door my heart beats irrationally as I'm still scared, but it's getting easier I talk myself through it and just keep thinking what's the worst that can happen.