Painful hands

happilymarried2013

Hi all,

Weirdly this is really hard for me to write but basically I suffer from compulsory skin picking. Its nice to know exactly what it is and that it has a nice title when I just thought that I was a minger and kept picking my hands.

I've tried absolutely everything to stop myself from doing it, I've tried acrylic nails (they work but couldn't afford the upkeep and now I can again I'm too ashamed to go and get them done), I've tried that "bitter" stuff you put on your nails - actually quite tasty. I'm finding now that I think its turning into a form of self harm.

I was wondering if anyone here could give me some other ideas to get over it, I'm in so much pain from a good picking session yesterday that I'm really sore and I can't hold a pen or pick anything up with my right hand.

Husband is supportive but naggy with it, but I'm hoping that I can use this as a stop picking diary as well as a request for help.

Thanks in advance all.

oystercatcher

I am similar to you. Only a little on my hands but badly on my feet. I can agree that it is very painful and incredibly hard to stop doing.

At the moment both hands and feet are intact and it's lovely. I can be like this and think I have broken the habit when it suddenly begins all over again making me feel so bad.

My tips. Moisturise skin well, use antispeptic cream to aid healing and then moisturise whenever you can. I find it's little dry flaky bits which start feeling irritating and then become irresistable for attention.

Distraction, find something else to do with hands that you enjoy and can be compulsive over. I have quite recently started crocheting and this keeps my hands busy, it's actually reduced dramatically the arthritic pain I have in my hands too. I keep it where I sit and can pick it up and put it down as needed so my hands and mind are always busy.

Think about the things that trigger 'attacks' , I haven't fully managed to work this out but there is definitely an element of emotional stress there.

That's a start, I will be interested to see how this thread evolves.

tomtontom

CBT, other talking therapies? Look into coping mechanisms for self harm and anxiety, oystercatcher mentions distraction which can be helpful - an elastic band on the wrist for instance, gives you something to focus on instead.

Nothing to be ashamed of, many of us have unhealthy coping mechanisms for stress, anxiety etc. It's a shame we don't learn more about mindfulness, meditation etc as children, so we have healthy coping mechanisms in place before the realities of life are thrust upon us.

happilymarried2013

Thank you both for your replies. I'm planning on keeping this as a diary, I've seen a blog somewhere where they've posted pictures of their hands. but I'm too ashamed of mine to do that.

Distraction seems like the best way forward. I can't do the elastic band on my wrist as I can't cope with things on my wrist. I'm on tablets for my anxiety and I've had CBT previously. I'm hoping to go back to the doctor next week for some more.

I have to kick this foul habit. My hands are in so much pain at the moment that I'm not entirely sure if I would prefer to chop them off. Typing isn't so bad as its the sides of my fingers that I've mauled. I've also noticed that trying not to bite my fingers that I'm biting my mouth and lips as well. I'm popping to lush tonight and hopefully I'll pick up some lovely bits to give myself some tlc.

But thank you both for your support. I'll try to sign back in tomorrow, if not when I come home from holidays and I'll have some updates.

heartbreak_star

If your skin (and nose!) can take it, a heavily-perfumed hand cream might be good. I actually used this method (amongst others) to help me stop biting my nails as the more perfumed the cream, the fouler the taste

HBS x

heuchera

I have no idea if this works, but I heard it on the radio. Week 1 - You stop picking the skin on one finger, week 2 you stop picking the skin on the 2nd finger, and so on until 10 weeks later you've banished the habit altogether.

Apparently it works for nail-biters!

sheramber

I find using a hand lotion for gardeners keeps my skin softer and there is no dry or rough bits to pick.

This lotion is much thicker than normal moisturiser.

Could you take up knitting or crochet as a way to distract you and keep your hands occupied?

theoretica

Might wearing thin cotton gloves to protect the skin help?

Anoneemoose

My hubby does this a lot! But he picks everywhere there's a dry patch or scab. I googled a bit to see if I could find any info on it and there was stuff to say it was often linked to OCD (which is basically just an extremely acute form of anxiety, with different manifestations). I have a form of OCD where I don't have outward manifestations, just rumination so I can identify.

I'm not sure if the CBT you have had previously has concentrated on the picking specifically, but if not, it might be worth mentioning it to your gp again, to see if you can get some more so yoh can deal with this in more depth.

happilymarried2013

Morning all, apologies for the time away as I've been on half term.
update on the hands - much less painful now, spent 4 days in a spa hotel so in and out of water but being moisturised regularly. I've got some really hard patches now though which are screaming for me to pick, but I've had a cold since coming home so my lips and nose are chapped so they're keeping me occupied atm. (waiting for collective EWWWWW)

I'd love to take up knitting or crocheting - I've tried am rubbish at both. I'm much better with a needle and thread but often use the needle to help me get the scabby dry bits. (again EWWWWWW)

My day job involves alot of typing so maybe I can get away with wearing gloves. I'll have to give it a go. Its definitely an anxiety thing with me - I know I need to relax but I'm struggling today - couldn't even relax on holidays properly. I think it might be a trip up the doctors soon, I really want to beat this myself but tbh I may have to wave the white flag soon.

SugarGirl

I realize that it's been a few days but you did mention keeping this as sort of a diary so hope you don't mind the late reply.

You can give yourself a hot oil manicure at home pretty easily, you just need two bowls some hot water and some oil. Put the oil in one bowl the water in another and stack the bowl with oil on top of the one with the hot water and pop your hand in for 10 minutes ish. For the oil I like coconut oil, it's cheap (around £2 a jar) doesn't smell weird like some oil, and easy to get a hold of (I get mine from the supermarket)