Ghgghhgggg

*Vikki*

Tggfgggfggggggggg

*Vikki*

Gbgbgfffffffff

*Vikki*

Thfgffggfggg

*Vikki*

thfffftffffff

January2015

*Vikki* wrote: »

Thanks I just posted that as this is the constant battle I have in my head. The need to want things NOW but also wanting to clear my debt as been going on for too long. Yeah they are manageable. I pay about £1700 off a month when I don't have other house bills. Its just then I keep finding other things to crave for to spend money on.

Just think how quickly £1,700 would mount up if you had cleared those debts and were saving that amount instead.

You need to turn your focus round from spending now, to saving to buy what you want. As I said, this from someone who clearly was useless at it:o

However, I am now so focussed on clearing our debts and saving for whatever we need. Obviously on a DMP we have no access to credit so we must save. The last year, since we started our DMP, has been one of the happiest years of our marriage. We are working together to clear the debts, and to find ways to save or accrue money for things we want/need.

As I said, your debt is currently manageable. I was at a manageable level once and it spiralled out of control. I'm not, by any means, saying you will as well but it's worth realising how quickly it can spiral out of control. If the job situation changes and you can't pay it, if you fall ill, etc. etc.

Try and focus on clearing the debts instead of increasing them. Target one debt at time and enjoy the sense of achievement when it's gone. Add the money paid to that debt to the next debt and aim to clear that and so on. Make a habit of paying off every bit you can towards a debt. Some do a payment a day, others save £1 coins and pay them off at the end of the month. Find something that works for you. The sense of achievement when a debt is gone is awesome and is far more satisfying than the short-lived sense of happiness when you buy another item on a credit card or loan.

Oh - and sourcrates gives fantastic support and advice. Tells it as it is, blunt as heck - but heart of gold:D

sourcrates

*Vikki* wrote: »

Omg if you give out free advice for people in debt god help them! I am not in that bad situation! How unhelpful! :money:

Sorry if it sounded harsh, but I tend to tell it like I see it.

You have posted about wanting to rein in your spending, then in the next sentence your visualising spending thousands of pounds more on credit.
I don't know your financial situation, but you obviously think you need help here, if you keep over spending to the tune of 7k all the time, you will, eventually end up in a situation where you can't repay it.

All I can say is self control is the key, otherwise you'll wake up one morning 100k in debt and wonder how the hell you got there.

It seems your starting to worry about your lack of control where spending is concerned, but you have not yet had your LBM, until you do reach that point, you won't appreciate advice given to you, most of us have been where you are now, and know we're it eventually leads !!

Debtslayer

*Vikki* wrote: »

At the moment a private number plate for husband is calling me as id love to treat him to it for his birthday, new fencing for the garden, and new windows and doors as when we had the storm the other day it was howling through. Id love to know how old our current windows are though as they don't seem that old. Need to stop spending!

This should be all the focus you need: You say you currently spend £1700 per month on your debts. Just think if you have paid those debts off how quickly you could save the £1700 per month and there is nothing more satisfying then having savings mounting up and having no debts.
Also you would be able to pay for new windows and doors for the house and new fencing and be able to pay cash for them.

pathtofreedom

The only way I've managed to calm down my spending is thinking long term more. The whole YOLO mindset and keeping up with the Jones' will do you no good.

What would you do if you won the lottery? Would you buy a bigger house or move, would you go on a big holiday, would you retire early?

If so add some ynab categories for things like that, and get your excitement back about those things. Wouldn't hubby be just as happy with some chocolate, a meal out, and tickets to a show / gig, rather than a number plate which means nothing really but a talking point occasionally, if it meant you could also then go on a big holiday next year? Or use that money towards saving for a deposit, or moving expenses for a forever home?

The whole point of ynab is to make you think what do I want to spend that on. Do I need some magazines or starbucks this week, or do I only do that once a month, or every other month, or never, and put that money in the new fence/ window/ holiday / house / retirement fund as deep down I want that more.

tlc678910

Someone on here has a nice signature that makes a good mantra about choosing between what you want now and what you want most.

Try and think about what you want most. Every random spend takes you further away from this goal (number plates?). It's not about not being generous to your husband - what does he want most? A paid off house, cash in the bank when the house or car needs repairing, no debt in retirement, the ability to go on holiday without putting it on credit? My guess is what he really want most if he thinks big won't be the number plate. Could you have a goal/dream in mind to work towards together?

Tlc

midnitegremlin

*Vikki* wrote: »

Not had my light bulb. But feel I do need to reign in my spending. I feel like I want, want, want everything. Its almost stressing me out that I can't seem to stop thinking about when I need next. And I get my debt down to about 8k then it goes back up to 13k again. If I stop wanting to overspend and get things for the house (fencing, new windows etc) I will be able to pay it off 20th September. But this spiral circle has been going on since October 2014. Where most of the debt started from doing up the house and wedding. But since then a large chunk 7k has been repairing my car (don't ask bmw for you)

How do you regain control? Its like when Im over eating, once I start I can't stop. But its so hard not to keep spending money.

Sorry for rambling. Just thought it was worth a post incase anyone can show me the light, as I do need it!

Are you American by any chance? I'm not joking, thats what they are actually like, without realising it.

Edit, sorry, that sounded harsh/racist. But yeah, it's good that you are thinking about this- things like buying a personal reg on credit. That's exactly the sort of "!!!!!!" situation, I don't understand the appeal of personal plates, but if someone wants to spend their money on them, fair play. But then, on credit? It just does seem to be the classic money you don't have on things you don't need situation...I honestly don't mean to sound harsh, hope you get your "lightblub!"