Brother In Law Being Stubborn

bluelass

grey_lady wrote: »

bluelass there's a saying that an englishman's home is is castle - you may not like your BIL, you may be a bit bitter or jealous that he has a large house handed to him but he is not being unreasonable in wanting to hang onto his home.

Re the other posters on this thread - the OP clearly has issues, be kind people.

I do not dislike him. We all think he is being silly he doesn't even have the heating on.

elsien

bluelass wrote: »

No I do not want to buy the house my BIL is living in and neither does any of our family or friends. They all own their own homes on private estates including myself. Just to clarify BIL received a letter from the council saying they need to review why a single person is residing in a large property. He has said he will not move out whilst his mother is still living and when he does leave the house he will rip out the fire surround, kitchen and fitted wardrobes because the council did not pay for them and he doesn't want the new tenant gaining from them. He was told years ago only to make improvements at his own expense if he was going to buy the house. And yes he does work but still pays bedroom tax because it is a large family home and he is a single occupant. He says if the council try to make him leave he will fight it. Does anyone think he is being reasonable?.

Given that he doesn't give a toss what his nearest and dearest(?!) think, what does it matter if we think he's being reasonable or not?

The situation is what it is, whether you like it or not. Everyone has their own priorities and he's chosen his.

Peter333

bluelass wrote: »

I do not dislike him. We all think he is being silly he doesn't even have the heating on.

I repeat... What has it got to do with YOU?!

Peter333

That's about right! bluelass gets challenged about her nosiness, and then logs off! :rotfl:

dragonette

reasonable? Not in the slightest, but it is between him and the council. Perhaps marking this as a rant/vent would have been more appropriate?

maman

bluelass wrote: »

Does anyone think he is being reasonable?.

I think he's behaving irrationally if you're not involved in any way but to him he sees that his home and his mother's tenancy is being threatened. It's his way of fighting back including the threats to remove all the fixtures and fittings.


I think it stems from the fact that people in council properties view them as their own homes when they actually still belong to the council. There is now the option to buy which he's not chosen. Previously if you had a council house you had it for life and he probably could have had the tenancy passed to him. Nowadays with so few council properties available there is pressure to vacate family sized homes.


As his family I think you should show compassion and try to help him come to terms with the situation.

Faith177

Maybe he's doing just to p you off OP?

I have people in my family like you and I just play them at their own game gives me a great deal of pleasure when I find out how wound up they are over something I've done that has no impact on them at all

Pollycat

bluelass wrote: »

No I do not want to buy the house my BIL is living in and neither does any of our family or friends. They all own their own homes on private estates including myself. Just to clarify BIL received a letter from the council saying they need to review why a single person is residing in a large property. He has said he will not move out whilst his mother is still living and when he does leave the house he will rip out the fire surround, kitchen and fitted wardrobes because the council did not pay for them and he doesn't want the new tenant gaining from them. He was told years ago only to make improvements at his own expense if he was going to buy the house. And yes he does work but still pays bedroom tax because it is a large family home and he is a single occupant. He says if the council try to make him leave he will fight it. Does anyone think he is being reasonable?.

Told by whom?

It doesn't matter if random strangers on t'internet think he's being unreasonable.
If his brother - not you - think he's being unreasonable, then it's up to him to try to deal with the situation - with your help if he asks for it.

Pollycat wrote: »

What does your husband think of his brother's situation?
Why are you posting to random strangers on a public forum instead of dealing with what you obviously see as a problem within the family?

If it really is an issue, why isn't your husband (and probably you) round there talking some sense into him?

From all the threads she's started, bluelass seems to perceive all sorts of 'issues' with lots of people - none of whom appear to be related to her - and is probably fobbed off (or more accurately told to mind her own business) and she then comes on here hoping to garner support so she can go back to her husband and say 'see, I'm not the only one who thinks xxx is wrong'.

Person_one

bluelass wrote: »

No I do not want to buy the house my BIL is living in and neither does any of our family or friends. They all own their own homes on private estates including myself. Just to clarify BIL received a letter from the council saying they need to review why a single person is residing in a large property. He has said he will not move out whilst his mother is still living and when he does leave the house he will rip out the fire surround, kitchen and fitted wardrobes because the council did not pay for them and he doesn't want the new tenant gaining from them. He was told years ago only to make improvements at his own expense if he was going to buy the house. And yes he does work but still pays bedroom tax because it is a large family home and he is a single occupant. He says if the council try to make him leave he will fight it. Does anyone think he is being reasonable?.

No he didn't, come on, at least try and make it a bit believable!

onlyroz

bluelass wrote: »

No I do not want to buy the house my BIL is living in and neither does any of our family or friends. They all own their own homes on private estates including myself. Just to clarify BIL received a letter from the council saying they need to review why a single person is residing in a large property. He has said he will not move out whilst his mother is still living and when he does leave the house he will rip out the fire surround, kitchen and fitted wardrobes because the council did not pay for them and he doesn't want the new tenant gaining from them. He was told years ago only to make improvements at his own expense if he was going to buy the house. And yes he does work but still pays bedroom tax because it is a large family home and he is a single occupant. He says if the council try to make him leave he will fight it. Does anyone think he is being reasonable?.

Presumably he still has the old kitchen, fire surround and wardrobes in storage so that they can be refitted when he leaves?