Can we go for custody of my partners step - son?

c0c0nuts

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c0c0nuts

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Guest101

c0c0nuts wrote: »

At what point did I say I was panicking?!
I've never been more sure of anything on my life- those boys deserve better, and given that I've been caring for them for months already- I have no fear of us pushing for custody.
Like most people- I come on here to either ask for advice/opinions or to give help to others.

No court can force someone to quit their job can they?! - I read this as a panicked expression, if it wasn't, I apologise

Poppie68

Have you contacted SS yet, my phone would be on fire now.....Don't delay get it done now!

Fosterdog

If the stepson wants to live with you he can just refuse to go home.

I know of a 14 year old who argued with his parents and wanted to live with his friend's family. The parents were happy for him to stay as they knew the troubled background he came from. The mother and her partner called the police and social services but we're basically told that as he was 14, the family were happy for him to stay and he was at no risk of any harm or danger there was nothing they could or would do to force him to go home.

He did only stay for a few months before a relative moved back to the area and he moved in with them instead, he is now 17 and hasn't been back to live with his mother, he has only visited his sibling there but even then prefers to meet them away from the home.

If he did stay at yours and police and social services were happy with that his mother would have to go to court to get him back and even then it is unlikely to happen as his wishes would be taken very seriously.

Once the eldest who is not your partners biological son loved with you there is a very good chance a court would also grant custody of the younger biological son as long as he also expressed a wish to live with you.

[Deleted User]

If both sons lived with you, what would happen on Saturdays?

74jax

deannatrois wrote: »

If both sons lived with you, what would happen on Saturdays?

I was just going to ask the same.

determined_new_ms

Sorry haven't read all posts because read the first few and had to post! I have a lot of experience in this area as I went to court and got custody of my granddaughter and am part of a kinship carers network, so have heard a lot of situations similar to this.

You can go to the court and apply for a child arrangements order or a special guardianship. Cost is £215 and I think for his step son you will need to apply for the right to apply as well. You can call Family Rights Matters or Coram's Children's Legal Advice Centre for detailed advice about how to complete the forms, the process and representing yourself at court if you can't afford solicitors. You will have to serve the papers to the children's mother before you submit the paperwork to court, unless you have evidence to suggest the children would be in danger and then you can ask the court to consider your application in private initially. We did this but the court wouldn't allow this but they did issue a temporary child arrangements order and a prohibiting steps order which meant my dd wasn't able to take dgd from us or the childminder.

Once the initial court appearance took place the court ordered section 7 reports and social services had to meet with us, my dd and other's involved with dgd and then submit a report with recommendations for where dgd should live based on what was in her best interests. At 13 your oh's step son would have considerable input on where he wants to live.

hths

TBagpuss

Your partner could make an applicatuion to the court. depending on how recently he and his ex split, he may need the court's permission to apply in relation to his step-son but this is likely to be granted.

The court must then make a decision based on what is in the best interests of the children, taking into account their needs, the ability of each person o care for them, and their wishes and feelings, considered in light of the age and understnading.

At 13, it is likely that considerable weight would be given to your step-son's wishes.

I would recommend that your partner gets in contact with social services to report the concerns about alcohol abuse and about verbal abuse of the children, and to ask whetehr someone can come to speak with the boys.

Is your step-son in contact with his biological dad at all? If his dad has Parental responsibility then he will need to be served with any application, as well as mum.

Technically, your partner has no authority to kep his step-son if mum turns up to collect him, so it would be sensible for him to look at starting the ball rolling for a cpourt application and/or involving social services sooner ratherthan later.

Obviously it would laso be possible for step-son to stay if mum gave her consent - if there chance that she would do so? (particuarlly if your partner doesn't try to make any changes regarding child support initially!)

determined_new_ms

Also if you haven't already keep a log of any interactions with the mother - dates, times, content of discussions, and any officials you speak to. Is there any chance the school will collaborate that home life is chaotic for the boys?