MoneySaving Poll: Is it acceptable to ask for wedding cash instead of gifts?

Former_MSE_Sam_M

Poll started 1 February 2016

Is it acceptable to ask for wedding cash instead of gifts?

In many countries around the world, cash gifts for weddings are a given, but in the UK traditionally they're frowned at.


If you were POLITELY asked for cash, not boxed gifts at a wedding, what’s your view?

Click here to vote in the poll

Did you vote? Are you surprised at the results so far? Have your say below. To see the results from last time, click here.

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Thanks!

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Nefetiti

Gone are the days when people lived at home till they set up home and wedding gifts helped the couple set up home. By the time most people are married they've got all household goods and how many jokes have we heard about 3 toasters. On moving home, a friend recently gave away all her wedding gifts of 20 years to charity they'd never used any of them it was all stored their attic. I come from a culture where money is given as a present, it's practical, and useful, not rude, and no-one judges anyone on the amount given.

serious_saver

Why are all the options in this poll negative. Where is the option for "I would be delighted to give them money to help them start on their lives together."

duchy

serious_saver wrote: »

Why are all the options in this poll negative. Where is the option for "I would be delighted to give them money to help them start on their lives together."

Because the polester has preconceived ideas about the result rather than wanting a true result- which isn't too surprising considering how often this topic get discussed........but does raise the question why MSE want to rehash the same arguments again. Surely as professional journalists they can find other more original topics ?

irishwench69

serious_saver wrote: »

Why are all the options in this poll negative. Where is the option for "I would be delighted to give them money to help them start on their lives together."

^^^^ Exactly. Surely it is about what the bride and groom want too - how rude to ignore their wishes.

This poll seems set up to cause rows and get an inaccurate result

IW x

Chimpofdoom

Don't have any problem with this, it's what the couple wants who is anyone to argue?

I got married in September, we paid for our own wedding and asked for cash as a gift (to pay for our honeymoon).

People seemed happy with it and we broke even on our honeymoon, only expenses incurred was what we spent there.

lisa110rry

For our son's wedding, we had a £10,000 budget to pay for (our) flights and accommodation (they were married in Thailand). The remainder was given to the happy couple. Fourth anniversary this month, bless them. They paid for the wedding themselves, but welcomed a little help from us.

kathrynha

Does seem that most people either are happy to give cash, or don't mind if a purpose is given for the cash.


Most newly weds these days already live together, so already have all the household goods they require, or have lived independently so between them have 2 lots of all the household goods they require.

Back when we got married 13 years ago my mum didn't even like the idea of putting the gift list cards in with the invitations, as it was rude to be asking for stuff, so we didn't, and only gave it to those that asked.
Of all our guests, some gave us stuff from the gift list, which we have used lots, some gave us vouchers for the shop our gift list was with, and that was really useful as we put them towards bigger thing, some gave us money, which was also useful and went with the vouchers towards bigger things.
The rest gave us presents they chose. Some were really nice, some were person and lovely, but there were a few that were "interesting" and are now gathering dust in the loft.

If you give people what they want, then it is more likely to be appreciated.

I do like to know what the money is going towards though.

minislim

wedding gifts are hailed from a time when you hadnt moved in together until after you were married and the gifts were items you needed.
eg. toaster, kettle, fondue set (theres always one!) etc.

in todays modern society most couples have been living together for ages and have everything like that.

we asked for money as gifts to pay for our honeymoon. it wasn't cheeky. we even said in our request that we have everything like that.

but we didnt want to do one of those organised bookings where the money goes to a third party. as they're taking their cut and you can't negotiate a better deal with the holiday firm!

most people are understanding about this nowadays!.

torbrex

Rather than honeymoon (lost its meaning) I would be happy to give cash towards a mortgage deposit for the couple.

duchy

I never had a problem with giving cash until I worked in a travel agency and the bride and her mother went through all the "contributions" in the shop making comments about the generosity or otherwise of each guest who had contributed to their holiday account.