Civil ceremony after blessing abroad local registry office says it can't be done???

mazy_m

Hi


So this is a post on behalf of my best friend. I can't go into all her reasons but they have decided to have a blessing abroad this year ( It's in Slovenia if that makes any difference to the legalities )

So we've all been talking about what going to happen with it etc and everyone just assumed that they could have the blessing in a church and then come home and do the "legal bit" as a civil ceremony a little while after coming back.


She called up her local registry office today to get it booked etc and she was told that she couldn't do this after the blessing as it would muddy the water as to whether or not they have been already been married.


Am I right in thinking that because it is a blessing in a church that this is what the issue is so they would have therefore had to get married prior to having the marriage blessed abroad?


Any helps or thoughts on this is much appreciated. Think she wanted to do the blessing first then the civil ceremony but she's very easy going so I imagine it's not going to rock the boat on the whole thing if this is the case.


Thanks

duchy

Yes it sounds like the registrar had doubts as to whether a blessing would confer any legal marriage form in the country it took place.
It may just be they are cautious or they may have had a similar issue in the past.

Probably the simplest thing is to get married in the registry office before they fly out

Noctu

Could they just tell the registry office that they've ditched the blessing idea, but still go ahead with it anyway?

lulu_92

I would have thought that as long as they're not signing any documents in relation to, or at the blessing, it wouldn't muddy any waters?

mazy_m

Thanks all for your replies. I told her I'd ask on here as it's a great place for advice with anything.


duchy - yes I see that makes sense. I think they probably will do it before they go out now. I remember when I spoke to the registrar when I was going to have a civil ceremony and they were adamant they couldn't be around anything that looked vaguely religious.


Noctu- she's a stickler for the rules. : ) I mean that in a nice way she's so honest and open it's lovely she wouldn't want to feel like everything isn't above board.


lulu92- That's what I thought as they didn't seem to mention signing anything. I''ll double check with her just in case.

Birdie85

It would probably be for the best if they get married first, then have the blessing abroad. That's the way I did it and as we had a 'Renewal of vows' we had to provide our wedding certificate so that there was no question that they were simply blessing a wedding that had already happened.

duchy

I suppose there is also the question of can you bless a marriage that doesn't actually exist yet ?

peachyprice

The usual way is to get married at the register office then have the blessing after, you can't have a marriage blessed if you're not married!

pinkteapot

Agree with others above - legal bit first, then blessing. I know two couples who have done similar - one had a blessing in a church, and one had a humanist wedding ceremony. Both did their registry office bit beforehand.

Any particular reason why this couple want to do it the other way round?

TonyMMM

The civil ceremony could be done after a church ceremony, but it does sound like there is some uncertainty about what exactly the Slovenian "blessing" constitutes legally.

Spendless

What exactly are they having blessed if they aren't married at the point they have the abroad ceremony?

I married abroad and then had a blessing in my local church in the UK a few weeks later.