Im really unhappy in my new job (team)

sangie595

Ok - so if you aren't the manager you were left asking your equal colleagues how to do the job. Does that make a big difference? You are criticising your former colleague for not doing the job correctly, but you say your colleagues are not great, your manager is rubbish and unsupportive, and it's her fault that in the same situation the job didn't get done right?

I think you are trying to square a circle. It's sort of the other persons fault for not doing the job (which wasn't her job?) right? You don't manage these other people but you need to ask them (for whatever reason) how to do things? Your managers a great person who hasn't provided any of the support or training you asked for, and takes the !!!! out of you for not doing the job right - but apparently they do this "nicely". And you love your job if you discount the colleagues, the staff, the management, and actually most things about the job?

And you don't want to go back to work? I'm not surprised. I'd be surprised if your colleagues want to go back either if this is how the show is run. Really, the only people here sounding sensible are the ones who have left. have you considered that the turnover is telling?

Nicd1981_2

sangie595 wrote: »

Ok - so if you aren't the manager you were left asking your equal colleagues how to do the job. Does that make a big difference? You are criticising your former colleague for not doing the job correctly, but you say your colleagues are not great, your manager is rubbish and unsupportive, and it's her fault that in the same situation the job didn't get done right?

I think you are trying to square a circle. It's sort of the other persons fault for not doing the job (which wasn't her job?) right? You don't manage these other people but you need to ask them (for whatever reason) how to do things? Your managers a great person who hasn't provided any of the support or training you asked for, and takes the !!!! out of you for not doing the job right - but apparently they do this "nicely". And you love your job if you discount the colleagues, the staff, the management, and actually most things about the job?

And you don't want to go back to work? I'm not surprised. I'd be surprised if your colleagues want to go back either if this is how the show is run. Really, the only people here sounding sensible are the ones who have left. have you considered that the turnover is telling?

Sangie , I do apologise if you are reading my worries the way you are.
I knew if I eventually ever told anyone how I was feeling they too would completely misread the situation and make it as petty as you have read it.


Ill try and be a little clearer.


My manager Is a great guy. He was promoted from senior to manager just before I started during a restructure.
This left the team with the following structure.
Manager, 2 seniors, me , and 2 juniors.
Then one of the juniors has left, we hired another who is great.
Then one of the seniors has handed in his notice.
We promoted one of the juniors to same role as me.
New structure is Manager , 2 seniors and 2 at my level and a junior.
So there has been a lot of change and simmering resentment from people who feel they have been over looked for promotion.
I do not think in anyway the lady who left was rubbish at her job, nor did I say that.
All I said was that the reports I took over from her where not completed correctly, so the management data taken from the reports was incorrect and incomplete so I've had to go back to the beginning of the financial year and amend.
I'm glad I asked this question here as anonymously as possible rather than directly as I wouldn't want anyone I know to think I'm basically just bad mouthing everypne I work with as this is definitely not the case.

sangie595

Nicd1981 wrote: »

My new boss wasn't around much, so I had to ask team members for advice, help etc as although I'm qualified to do my role its a completely different industry to where I had come from. This became a source of ridicule for me.
My new boss also ridicules me in front of the team, and whenever I ask a question I'm basically asked to shut up (although in a funny way)
My new boss is a really nice guy, none of this is done in an aggressive way. However its emotionally distressing for me , so much so ive found myself sobbing with frustration in the toilets at work as I feel like I'm the'' BUTT'' of jokes. And my confidence is taking a terrible battering.
Before we broke up for Christmas there was a pivotal point where I ended up snapping, as I was again being mocked very publicly when I asked a question about a new task I was being shown. To which my boss said he cant wait for my 1-1.
I'm considering not returning in January, any advice would be greatly appreciated I must add I get on with everybody at work, have great friendships in other departments, just seem to be an outcast in my new team and cant understand why

I've obviously misread all of these comments. Your manager is great. Absolutely perfect.

Can you hear yourself? It isn't me misreading your comments. Either your comments are untrue. Or you are spinning reality.

This isn't "petty". It is appalling.

Nicd1981_2

sangie595 wrote: »

I've obviously misread all of these comments. Your manager is great. Absolutely perfect.

Can you hear yourself? It isn't me misreading your comments. Either your comments are untrue. Or you are spinning reality.

This isn't "petty". It is appalling.

I've worked in offices for over 10 years and suppose I'm used to office banter and have became a little immune to it. I think the only reason I'm being hyper sensitive to it now is because I'm new to the team and feel a little like I'm an outcast. I'm not used to this feeling and am feeling very overwhelmed by it.
Usually I get along great with team members and members of the wider organisation.
However, here I get along with everyone in the wider organisation but seem to have not fitted in well with my team.

sangie595

Oh dear. If you are used to office "banter" why the hell are you in the toilet, crying? If you think you are being hypersensitive, then this is a lost cause.

This is NOT acceptable or normal work practice - your new manager is a bully and has the sensitivity of a rhino. Being "too busy" to support their own staff, being unable to train their own staff, and making their staff the butt of nasty jokes about their ineptitude as a result of their own inadequacies...? I think you are missing most of the point. Your manager is not a nice but misunderstood guy. He's a total ******* and shouldn't be in a position of responsibility.

Stop for one second making excuses here. If you were in his position, would you do a single thing he has done? Would you treat your staff in this way? Because if you would, then you should never be trusted in a management role. And if you wouldn't, why on earth are you making excuses for him and acting like this is your fault?

Taiko

Sounds a very similar situation to my own, and same sort of work periods. Many years spent doing a similar role in another industry, only to join a company that aren't great at supporting.

Document every request you make for assistance. Should any issues arise in future, at least your back is covered that way. As for the issues, you just need to speak up. Follow your grievance procedure, and hopefully attitudes will change. Won't always, and again I speak from experience of the current job.

If you're still unhappy, look elsewhere unless you can be sure that things will change. I'm personally resigned to the fact that my group won't change, and that to do my own role effectively they have to.

prowla

Nicd1981 wrote: »

Iv'e only been in my new team 6 months and have started to consider I've made a mistake.
When I first started the job the lady who sat next to me seemed lovely, within weeks she was being quite abrupt and rude. Two other members of the team also dismissed me, or just blatantly ignored me. Then the lady handed in her notice. It came to light that she had gone for my role but didn't get it.
After she left I thought things began to look up, but then another teem member handed in his notice.
My new boss wasn't around much, so I had to ask team members for advice, help etc as although I'm qualified to do my role its a completely different industry to where I had come from. This became a source of ridicule for me.
My new boss also ridicules me in front of the team, and whenever I ask a question I'm basically asked to shut up (although in a funny way)
My new boss is a really nice guy, none of this is done in an aggressive way. However its emotionally distressing for me , so much so ive found myself sobbing with frustration in the toilets at work as I feel like I'm the'' BUTT'' of jokes. And my confidence is taking a terrible battering.
Before we broke up for Christmas there was a pivotal point where I ended up snapping, as I was again being mocked very publicly when I asked a question about a new task I was being shown. To which my boss said he cant wait for my 1-1.
I'm considering not returning in January, any advice would be greatly appreciated I must add I get on with everybody at work, have great friendships in other departments, just seem to be an outcast in my new team and cant understand why

I would suggest having a quiet word with the boss, as he may not even realise he's doing it, though the "cant wait for 1/1" would suggest that he is aware.

It is very important not to pick on people, even if you think it is harmless, and it is very difficult to spot that you are doing it. I like to think that I can do that and can take as much as I can give.

I been in the situation a couple of times where there has been a clique going on, and there can be some nasty unprofessional people about; things usually come to a head at some point...

Of course, however, there are situations where people have been brought in to perform a skilled role which they as simply not up to, and in that case they may not be appropriate for the job and the others may resent "carrying" them. However, every job takes some learning, so people need to be tolerant of newcomers.

theoretica

You say that the manager is recently promoted - chances are that he hasn't settled into being a manager yet, and while he may become a good manager he isn't yet. Your problem is managing him from beneath without upsetting him as no-one likes their failings being pointed out and managers are human too.

For instance 'training' sounds time consuming and formal and needs preparation - but would he be happy if you popped a 15 minute meeting in his diary to ask him to clarify which format he would like something done in?

Anasyd

Good luck - It's a horrible situation and they sound like a really terrible group of people.