How to show gratitude for free music lessons

whitewing

Could he play a carol or two at school? If he has to perform for his class he may be more inclined to rehearse?

Chavvy__Jane_Austen

whitewing wrote: »

Could he play a carol or two at school? If he has to perform for his class he may be more inclined to rehearse?

He is quite shy. We did suggest this once, but he was mortified at the thought, so we did not force the idea. It would be a bit cruel.

Clive_Woody

Chavvy__Jane_Austen wrote: »

I don't think it is all that dire - he is at approx grade 2/3 level. My son does not really enjoy it but I think it would be a real shame to let this opportunity go just from a childish lack of interest/discipline. He also does Judo, which he enjoys, so I would not drop that and I will not drop swimming until he is proficient.

The childminder is in a flat and did not seem keen on the idea of a trumpet practice there so I dropped the idea.

I was lucky enough to spend some time at school learning a musical instrument, but like your son I wasn't the most motivated when it came to practice and eventually I gave it up.

I am not a big one for regrets or looking backwards but I would now love to be able to play a musical instrument and I wish I had stuck with it.

Could you offer some small sort of reward if your son practices (TV time, small pack of sweets, etc)? Or get your son to have a look at some of the great musicians on Youtube and listen to the music they make see if he is inspired by them.

fairy_lights

Chavvy__Jane_Austen wrote: »

I don't think it is all that dire - he is at approx grade 2/3 level. My son does not really enjoy it but I think it would be a real shame to let this opportunity go just from a childish lack of interest/discipline. He also does Judo, which he enjoys, so I would not drop that and I will not drop swimming until he is proficient.

If he's also doing Judo and Swimming lessons, on top of his music classes, I'm not surprised he doesn't want to practice. He probably needs time to play with his friends, watch TV, do other kid stuff. I don't think a lack of interest can be called 'childish' as such - sometimes you just don't enjoy things, and never will no matter how much time you put in.

Angry_Bear

bouicca21 wrote: »

Cake. always cake.

^^ This.

I play brass and have done this with a number of bands over the years. I give the lessons because I enjoy doing it, and I don't want to see brass banding die out - it breaks my heart that schools no longer give free lessons and a whole generation may miss out on the opportunity I got. There's no way I would have been able to learn if it had cost.

To be honest, a Christmas card with a note of thanks is more than enough to make my day! The people who give these lessons do it because they know that the recipients probably can't afford to pay, trust me, they don't expect anything back. But cake will ALWAYS be appreciated .

sheramber

As someone who was sent to piano lessons when not interested i would say you are wasting the teacher's time.

My mother and sister played the piano. My uncle taught piano and organ.

It was assumed I would learn to play.

But, i rarely practiced and learned very little over the years.

Do I regret it? No, 60 years later I still have no interest in playing the piano.

Person_one

Chavvy__Jane_Austen wrote: »

I don't think it is all that dire - he is at approx grade 2/3 level. My son does not really enjoy it but I think it would be a real shame to let this opportunity go just from a childish lack of interest/discipline. He also does Judo, which he enjoys, so I would not drop that and I will not drop swimming until he is proficient.

I always found that the real joy of playing an instrument was in playing along with others in a band/group setting, or playing the pieces you've chosen yourself and really enjoy listening to as well as playing. Let's face it, endless scales and arpeggios and study pieces for technique are not that much fun however old you are!

Does he enjoy playing in a band/group? Is he more enthusiastic if he's playing something he's chosen? Songs from films he likes maybe?

heuchera

Chavvy__Jane_Austen wrote: »

He is given an hour of music tuition once a week by one of the members, either at his house or in a church hall the band uses. He seems to have a natural talent but has not made that much progress as he does not practice often enough. By the time he is back from the childminder and I have made dinner and overseen homework, gone to Judo, swimming etc I do not really have the energy to force him to practice so I feel bad that this gift is being wasted in a sense.

Can I just say, as someone who's got music teachers in the family, that the WORST kind of parent is the one who forces their unwilling child to practise. Ask him if he wants to continue learning the instrument, and if he does than you can make clear to him that he will get the best out of his lessons is he practices and puts the effort in.

If he doesn't want to learn, then it's better to stop wasting his and the teacher's time. It could also be that he's being spread too thinly if he's having to do judo, school, after-school childminder, swimming, music and other things!

Hope this doesn't sound too harsh

theoretica

I found music became more enjoyable as I became more competent, so the fastest way to make it really fun may be to practice.

If you want him to progress, practice needs to become a routine and habit every day. The most important is often simply picking up the instrument and playing something, anything, even if it is only a couple of minutes some days. Could he practice while you are getting with dinner?

And I agree - a note of thanks always goes down really well - from you and from your son.

krlyr

I vaguely remember going to recorder lessons with a friend when I was younger. Didn't really enjoy it, never practiced outside of lessons, never progressed that much (had to 'mime' along to a couple of songs in the school assembly as I didn't know them!), and was more than happy to give it up. Have never regretted it at all. So I agree with the sentiments - if he's not enjoying it and he's got plenty of other interests for a healthy social life (and sounds like with the 2 dropouts and not playing with the band, it's perhaps not really got much social benefit either), I'd ask if he wants to continue with it or not.