Unhappy in job - feel trapped

whichjob

Hi all

Not really expecting anyone to read or care but, in case anyone has had similar experiences, I thought I'd share my experience in the hope of getting some advice or at least some constructive criticism. I've created a new profile for this post in case people know me on here.

Short version: I've changed careers and employers so many times over the past few years that I now feel stuck in a job that I know deep down I won't ever be happy in. I have no good reason for switching in the past other than I've not been 100% happy and have sought out something new to try - however I don't think I'll be able to explain this away in any future interviews without sounding completely non-commital and flaky (which I guess I am!).

Long version...

I always felt a little different in school in that I had no idea what I wanted to be when I grew up, other than the romantic notions of being a pilot or long distance lorry driver! I found at school that I was quite good at mathematical and business subjects so I focussed on these in order to get good grades to get in to Uni. When it came to choosing University subjects, I had no idea what I wanted to do but, as I was good at business subjects, I figured that I would do a good general degree and enrolled in a law course. I worked hard and came out with a first class law degree.

Natural progression led me to apply for a legal traineeship and I eventually qualified as a lawyer. After about a year of full qualification (so 3 years or practice in total) I was unhappy with the terms of my employement (low pay due to financial troubles at the firm, no pension etc) so I decided to move. I don't know why, but for some reason I decided to change profession and applied to a large accoutancy firm in the city. Queue career change and dropping back down to new graduate level (and salary) to spend 3 years studying for an accountancy qualification, which I achieved.

I remained with the accountancy firm for one further year (4 in total) and then decided to move to another employer, a large UK bank, in a slightly different role. My experiences there were not good and I really didn't enjoy the role so after a year I looked for another position and ended up moving to another large accountancy firm, in another slightly different role.

I have now been with the firm for just under a year but I already know that this is not the job I want to be in. I am naturally a quiet person and this role forces me to constantly speak in public which takes me out of my comfort zone. Although I knew this before I joined (and I thought it would be good to challenge myself) I now realise that I don't want this type of role an no internal role change will get me away from this.

My problem now is that, if I move again, I will quite rightly look flaky and indecisive. The truth is I really don't know what I want to do for a career and I never have. All I know is that this job (and others in the past) gets me down and I'm not happy or confident. Why would any future employer consider me given my history? Also my constant changes mean that I'm now in my late 30's and I have no specialism or expertise built up. I've just constantly been trying new things and mastering none.

Another consideration is, although I'm on good money, I have a lot of commitments and debt built up through University and through taking a 3-year step back to study again. I can't afford to take time out to reflect or to take another step back.

All this leaves me feeling trapped in job that I don't enjoy and a pretty crappy life in general.

So, for anyone who has been kind enough to read this far - have I completely screwed myself up here? I sometimes put myself in the position of employer in an interview and, faced with my history as a job applicant, I can think anything other than I wouldn't hire this person because, on previous history, they don't know what they want and are likely to leave almost as soon as they start. I used to put a positive spin on my constant changes in terms of gaining experience of many areas whilst narrowing down where I actually want to be and what I actually want to do. I think that wears a little thin now.

Thanks for reading, and apologies for the sob story.

Takeaway_Addict

4 jobs in 8 years isn't terrible you know. I'd not look particularly down on it, if it had been job swapping every 3-6 months then thats different.

You seem to be highly skilled, quite intellectual and capable which does go a long way, the fact is you do not know what you want to do.

Because you don't know what you want to do is there any purpose in moving jobs again at this moment in time? For me no.

Perhaps see the job as a means to an end and change your aims in life, concentrate on debt repayment, concentrate on out of work enjoyments- hobbies etc because I suspect you do little around your job...am I correct?

Also, just a point but I would also suspect that you are actually getting better at speaking in public, if you look at how you perform now compared to 1 year ago I would expect a drastic change in performance.

Don't be to hard on yourself.

whichjob

Thanks for your response Takeaway_Addict.

I appreciate your advice. The main reason I want to move is that I'm unhappy and down about life in general. A lot of that comes from being in a new role and not confident or up to speed with the technical side of things, but a lot also comes from the fact that I'm not enjoying the role. Whilst my public speaking may have improved slightly, it is still terrible, I still get red faced every time and I still feel dread from the moment that I find out I have to speak to the time I actually speak, which can be anything up to a month in between. Its something that I just don't feel comfortable with and, no matter how good I get, I never will shake the worry and dread and frankly, now that I've tried it, I know that I just don't want to be in a constantly public-speaking role.

I guess the happiest I've been in life is when I was a lawyer. I knew my area, I enjoyed it and was relatively good at it. Client interactions were fine because they were with one or two people max and I was confident in what I was saying. I feel like I left the profession two rashly. Part of my wants to give it a go again. How could I possibly put a positive spin on leaving in the first place though, let alone changing jobs several times after that!!

yeesha04

Hello,

Since you enjoy law, why don't you go back to it? Maybe you should look at in-house legal roles instead of law firms but then that will depend on the section of law that you like.

makeyourdaddyproud

You're starting to hate Capitalism. A positive trait is emerging.

Scorpio33

You are exactly like me.


Not sure what I wanted to do for a job, was good at Maths, so plumped for an Accounting degree. Then spent 3 years qualifying and now am working in a career that I have never felt at ease with.


When I was made redundant from my last role, a few things helped me:


1. Ask yourself, if money was no object, what would you spend your day doing? That should then give you a hint as to what you enjoy and so what you could possibly do as a career.
2. Look at your childhood experiences for what you enjoyed when you were younger, again they should give you pointers as to what you enjoy.


3. Investigate practically how those potential careers could pan out. If you find you are unable to get to where you want (For any reason), then work for a company, doing what you do now, but for a company in the industry that your interests are in - at least then everyday you are surrounded by what you enjoy.


For me, the thing I struggle with - is it just the job or is it the career?

tomtontom

How about HMRC? They're recruiting at the moment and there are roles where you would use both law and accountancy. Also the way they recruit means your jumping between jobs will not be an issue - I think it would be for most professional roles in the private sector as they would doubt your loyalty.

TELLIT01

I've only read the short version, so apologies if I missed anything important.

I don't imagine many of us are totally happy in the job we do. Most jobs have bits about them we don't like, but as long as the bad bits are heavily outweighed by the good we muddle along.
It's when the bad is the majority we need to take stock and look at moving on.
It seems these days that moving on after a short period is more the norm than it was 20 or more years ago. Then there seemed to be more loyalty - in both directions between staff and employer. Now staff are dumped without a second thought when it suits so your first loyalty needs to be to yourself. Sad but true.

Money_saving_maniac

whichjob wrote: »

Thanks for your response Takeaway_Addict.

I appreciate your advice. The main reason I want to move is that I'm unhappy and down about life in general. A lot of that comes from being in a new role and not confident or up to speed with the technical side of things, but a lot also comes from the fact that I'm not enjoying the role. Whilst my public speaking may have improved slightly, it is still terrible, I still get red faced every time and I still feel dread from the moment that I find out I have to speak to the time I actually speak, which can be anything up to a month in between. Its something that I just don't feel comfortable with and, no matter how good I get, I never will shake the worry and dread and frankly, now that I've tried it, I know that I just don't want to be in a constantly public-speaking role.

I guess the happiest I've been in life is when I was a lawyer. I knew my area, I enjoyed it and was relatively good at it. Client interactions were fine because they were with one or two people max and I was confident in what I was saying. I feel like I left the profession two rashly. Part of my wants to give it a go again. How could I possibly put a positive spin on leaving in the first place though, let alone changing jobs several times after that!!

Stick at it for another year if you can bear it. Changing jobs every 2 years is fine providing you can pass it off as wanting to develop your skills.

This role is in fact developing your sills even if you hate it. When you start looking for another role just don't say you hated it!

Alternatively could you not set yourself up as an accountant or management accountant?

missi76

Hi, sorry to hear your not happy, i can honestly say I have been there too.
I am too in my late 30 s, naturally quiet and introverted although like to be in a role that keeps me on my toes but hate speaking in front of others, I forget words which makes it worse and I'm still unsure what job I want to do as a career.

Have you done the careers tests? they can be good at narrowing down job roles and also can be good for suggesting roles that I had not thought of.(even in the same field as my interests)
Could you do some distance learning courses as a taster maybe ?

PS Don't worry about the career change and how it will look to prospective employers, if your hearts in it you will come across as genuinely interested and as someone that has branched out a bit, tested the waters in other areas and has now decided what they want to do, this can be a positive for an employer as they will see that you know what you want .

Kynthia

I don't think you've changed jobs too often considering you've stayed most places 3-4 years. If it was less than 2 years in most places I think it would be concerning. You also are highly qualified and have shown the ability to commit to long term study and see it through. I know people that have started and not finished more than one or two professional qualifications so you definitely don't come across as flaky.

If you want to apply somewhere else and tell them that a public speaking role wasn't for you, but you had wanted to challenge yourself and develop a new skill, then go for it. There's lots of different types of accounting roles from technical financial accounts, corporate management accounts, public sector or private sector, project accounting and costing in manufacturing, working in practice with small businesses and sole traders, etc. You could find something more suited to you. Or if you want to get back into law then try as what's the worst that can happen?