Paying off my parents mortgage in secret for Christmas?

racing_blue

Just to flesh that last comment out a bit, have you read the chapter "Economic Outpatient care" in "Millionaire Next Door"? Children who receive large cash gifts from parents typically become less productive and more dependent. Wonder how it works the other way round? It is a heart-warming thought but still, something about it makes my antennae twitch in a weird way.

KRB2725

I think it's a fantastically kind and loving thing to do. I can't see it as anything but that.

racing_blue

Someone comes on here, gets a range of opinions, takes them on board, proceeds. All good

AlexMac

Parents will probably never speak to you again, as only after having paid off the home loan (which is not real money, as its a notional illiquid sum, probably on a really low interest rate and factored into their regular outgoings) will you realise that if they knew you had a big spare wad of real liquid cash they would have blown it on a lambo, cruise holiday ar something actually enjoyable...

But hey- why not twist the knife?

melanzana

Just make a cheque out to the mortgage company(crossed to account only!)

Then put it in the card.

Sorted.

What a wonderful thing to do. Kudos

clf1605

alcur wrote: »

I'm wanting to pay off my parents £40k mortgage as a Christmas present. The only thing is I want to do this as a surprise.

I personally would be entirely grateful to my children if they paid off my mortgage (if I had one).


BUT the dynamics of the relationship MAY change (it's a pride thing being capable of providing for your children, not the other way round). Some parents may be embarrassed at being forever "indebted" to you just for your sheer generosity. Only you will know your own parents and how they're likely to feel...


Perhaps you could just pay off the majority of the balance of their last statement in secret (bankers draft is untraceable for them) and just be happy knowing that they are virtually debt free, without potentially upsetting them.


Without being "negative" it could be a minefield, so just tread very carefully as you do this wonderful thing for your family. You've obviously been brought up very well not to be selfish with your wealth. I applaud you and your parents.

moneyistooshorttomention

I don't see it as changing "parent/(adult) child" dynamics personally.

Sounds like OP has been brought up well by their parents and has done well for themselves (ie good career or the like) and now thinks its appropriate to repay them (ie because they're now in a position where they have that chance).

It sounds fair enough to me. OP was brought up by those parents for x number of years (16/18/21 years) and they've spent out a lot of money on doing that. I'm guessing OP does see their good fortune in having that money available spare as a way to repay this. I would assume that the parents do too.

Parents and (adult) children usually tend to have pretty similar attitudes to money. So if OP sees it as a "chance to repay and be generous" then I'd be willing to bet their parents would also see it that way.

I would imagine the parents would be out around their friends boasting proudly about how well their child has done/how generous they have been to them and generally enjoying being able to do that
- as well as enjoying having that millstone removed from around their neck and having some extra money to spare each month.

jimbog

It is important to do it properly and so you would need to practice what you are going to do first. In this way I might be able to help.
Send a cheque to pay off my outstanding mortgage and if it all goes through ok I'll let you know next week

Katgrit

PasturesNew wrote: »

paying it off in crisp £50 notes, before getting sausage and chips from the chip shop across the road .... just like they did the day they got the keys to the house all those years ago.

When I pay my mortgage off I am SO doing this!!

alchemist.1

Good for you. Hope you do go ahead with it. It's a very nice gesture. I wish i was in a position to do the same.

Love the over analysing and the amateur psychologists. I really don't imagine they will be anything but appreciative.