BK & Husbandface diary

Kitten868

It's tricky but weight loss and pregnancy can be totally safe. The thinnest one of my friends has ever been was whilst pregnant - people have the most horrific morning sickness and it's fine. Do try and have dairy for your own resources but for me it was always about taking the vitamins to ensure baby always had enough without my teeth falling out. Worth looking at
What's upsetting you about being pregnant? X

Newlywed_Saving_Ninja

I am on slimming world kitten, my main reason for joining slimming world was that I know you can continue with it while pregnant. The midwife signed the form for me to continue on it at my first appointment a few weeks ago. I get an extra a and b choice every day, so extra calcium in the a choice and fibre in the b choice. I am taking a daily pregnancy vitamin as like you I don't fancy encountering future problems with my bones or teeth.

It's lots of things to be honest. I'm 37 and have been trying for 2.5 years for this baby. So I should be over the moon. Instead I have been miserable for a month or more now (not every day but most days). I think I subconsciously gave up in September and moved on planning a different life. Now I am just dreading it. I wish I had lost a few more stone before getting pregnant, 7.5 stone is great but not enough, I wish we had less debt, if we hadn't mucked about after buying this place my loan would be paid off by now. I love my life and will miss it, we have a brilliant life. I've stopped telling people who are already parents as they don't have a good thing to say to us, just laughing while telling us our lives are over, how old we are, how I've lost all that weight and am now going to put it all back on. I could go on forever! I've stopped telling people fullstop actually. I just can't cope with it being the only thing people want to talk to me about, it's like all I am is pregnant and nothing more. I can feel myself slipping away and I haven't even had it yet. My husband has been great, but just keeps saying to me it will be fine and that life won't changemuch

Newlywed_Saving_Ninja

Continued...

Only as much as we let it change. But as I snapped at him, his won't as much as mine. He will carry on going to work, I won't be working for a whole year, I may not have a job to go back to if work don't agree to part time hours that I want, I will be stuck at home with no adult company. I don't want our relationship to change as we get on brilliantly and were so happy before this, so the arguing is feeling a bit alien to us as it never happens usually. He doesn't get it I don't think! As patient as he is, I know he is sick of me and has said he feels like he has lost his wife. I know what he is saying, I don't feel like myself anymore either.

Kitten868

No one tried two and half years for a baby if they don't want one. I'm sure you want this baby. I do understand. You get yourself to a point where you talk yourself into focusing on the negatives so you won't get so heartbroken when it doesn't happen. You've been caught out with a surprise. I'm sure that's how all babies like to come, they don't like being part of a plan. Then your wonderful news is met with people talking down to you. I get it! My first baby I didn't tell anyone I was pregnant. I was too scared to lose her and I couldn't bare the face people pull when they think you're an idiot when you could be having a career etc etc.
!!!! them!
This is fantastic news!! And you don't have to feel completely happy every minute of every day about it. No one tells you that. I think that's why you get 9 months to mull it all over! It's actually happened and that is scary but it's going to be fine
You're not having someone else's baby - you're having yours. They fit in like your specially chosen side kick to go through life with you. It's not a constant hell and you don't have to take a year out of working. You have to take 6 weeks. They get bits of your personality and you understand each other. It's going to be fab. Promise. X

Kitten868

On a different note though if you do feel this is out of character for you and that your response is an over reaction to what is going on speak to your GP as pregnancy can trigger depression and there is help available. That isn't how it sounds for you though x

Newlywed_Saving_Ninja

Oh bum, I posted an update earlier and it has been lost, I am too tired to type it all out again!

So I will be updating my totals today, We are overpaying my loan with £500 this month, so my loan now has a fraction over £4000 left to clear it in full before I go on maternity leave. I would always like it to be more, but happy to report that our total debt now stands at £12,258.38, down from £15,094.78 when I started this diary October 2015. Not bad going really.

Newlywed_Saving_Ninja

OK, so I will try and recreate my post from a few days ago that got eaten!

HF's car insurance was due this month, so that has eaten £238 of the money earmarked for the loan overpayment sadly. But it is done for another year, and we got £50 cashback (sadly not due to be paid until 16 weeks time!) too, so happy about that. Also, my car had its MOT a last week, and that went straight through with just an advisory on the two front tyres, so really happy about that. We just need my car to last another 1-2 years in order to be able to replace it with a much newer car, we will see what happens I guess! If I weren't pregnant we would probably be looking in to replacing it sooner, but things have changed now with our baby on the way.

The meal plan is done for the week, details below:

Monday - Singapore noodles
Tuesday - Cottage pie
Wednesday - Paprika pork
Thursday - Pizza (non SW friendly meal, we have frozen pizza express pizzas in the freezer that we bought in the yellow sticker cabinet).
Friday - SW burgers, SW chips and salad
Saturday - Salt and Pepper fish fingers, SW chips and mushy peas

We worked with what we had in the freezer as much as possible, as due to buying baby things, our grocery account is not looking good, and we are going to have to add to it this month in order to do the next 2 weeks shopping. I am going to speak to HF tonight about cutting back on our meals for the next few weeks, we may be living on jacket potatoes, salads, omelettes etc. HF will be fine with it, but I do need to discuss it with him.

Our shopping bill for this week as follows:

Aldi: Mushrooms, Carrots, Onions, Oranges, Mixed chillies, Grapes, Easy Peeler small oranges, Spring onions, 3 peppers, 6 tomatoes, frozen summer fruits, 4 x mushy peas, braeburn apples, 3 x tins of complimints, 830g strong cheddar, pack of ham, 30 pack of crisps. £20.75

Tesco: Birthday card, 2 x 400g Kingsmill wholemeal, 3 bunches of flowers, 1 x 4l skimmed milk. £13.58. The flowers were for the crematorium as it s 3 years since my mother in law passed away, while there we also take flowers for my father-in-law and sister-in-law.

Sainsburys: 2 x 500g fromage frais, 1 x4l skimmed milk, 1 x Kingsmill wholemeal, £4.15

Butcher: 1kg steak mince, £6.49

We need to try and get out grocery bill down, I am not sure how, if anyone has any ideas feel free to shout!


Yesterday I had to go and get some tissues as we are both ill at the moment, and also some wrapping paper as a few babies have been born this week. I got Kleenex balsam tissues that were on offer, 2 x twin packs for £4, it was the best value deal for what we wanted (we wanted the balsam tissues as our noses are so sore!). The rolls of wrapping paper were on offer in Tesco 3 for 2, so I got 3 for £2.50, one that is suitable for the baby gifts, and then 2 general ones for birthdays, they will be good for both adult and child birthdays. I also bought a bib as a small gift for one of the babies (I feel mean, but couldn't afford much, also we are not close to this person). Total spend £8.25.

Our great niece was born last week too, so I had a blanket embroidered for £12, it has the name, date, birth weight, birth time etc on it. This is my go to gift for people we are close to who have babies, it looks nice, it is good quality and finish, thoughtful and always goes down well, and for £12 is a total bargain in my opinion.

The spends on baby things are bad timing due to all of the things we have bought for our future baby, but hey ho, it happens!

As for baby spends for our own child, well there isn't much else to get. We have a travel system (preloved), we have a cot (preloved), we have a chest of drawers (we already have them). So it is just clothes really. Our friend who has her little girl in a few weeks has said she will give us a lot of things, as by the time ours arrives, she won't need a lot of it, and will have lots of clothes for us etc.

We just have two more birthdays coming up this month, one that is just a card, and another that will just be £10 in a card.

Newlywed_Saving_Ninja

So time for this week's diary entry. No debt reductions to report, as it all tends to get done when we both get paid. But it is nice to see our debt paid off reach just shy of 25%. I have been feeling a bit disappointed that we aren't further forward, but 25% is no mean feat.

This week's meal plan is below, we have a lot of vege dishes this week as we don't have much meat in the freezer, and due to spending some of this month's shopping budget on baby stuff, we need to reduce our grocery bill for the rest of the month as much as possible. As it is we are having to take money from the household bills account to do our grocery shopping. We had a look around farmfoods this weekend, mainly looking for cheaper ways to buy frozen fruit, but while there we noticed they do 3 packs of fish for £10, and also chicken too. HF surprised me by saying he would buy the frozen chicken, but as it is we mainly just chop it up and put it in pasta, curries etc. So we should see the amount we spend on meat and fish reduce quite a bit going forward, as 3 bags of fish and 3 bags of chicken will last us quite a long time due to it being just the two of us.

Saturday: Salt and Pepper fish fingers, SW chips, mushy peas and salad.
Sunday: Cottage pie topped with swede not potato, savoy cabbage
Monday: Mushroom pappardelle pasta
Tuesday: Vegetable lasagne with salad
Wednesday: Paprika pork, rice and salad
Thursday: Frozen pizza express pizza, SW chips and salad
Friday: SW burger, SW chips and salad

We went back to getting most of our fruit and vegetables from our local greengrocers this week, it is much cheaper, we do get much more for our money. Spends below:

Greengrocer: lettuce, large cucumber, large bowl of mushrooms, large bowl of pink lady style apples, large bowl of green apples, large bowl of oranges, 2 red and 2 yellow peppers, savoy cabbage, 820g bag of black grapes. £10.37
Sainsburys: 1kg Bertolli olive oil spread, Tub of quark, Tub of Greek style yoghurt, 8 LF cumberland sausages. £6.70
Aldi: 2 4pt skimmed milk, swede, 30 pack of meaty crisps, frozen blueberries, 15 medium free range eggs, basmati rice, 2 tins of complimints, tomato puree, passata. £12.39
Tesco: 4 pack of Tesco tinned plum tomatoes, 3 400g Kingsmill wholemeal bread. £2.89

Total spend £33ish.

That is it really from me. Not much to report. Though frankly if one more person disbelieves me when I say I feel fine despite being 14 weeks pregnant, no I haven't had morning sickness, no I don't feel tired, no I am not in pain etc etc, I am going to scream!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Newlywed_Saving_Ninja

Wow, I knew I had been away for a long time, but didn't realise it had been 2 months!!!

I just needed time to get my head around this pregnancy to be honest, I have found it very tough mentally and just needed time to get my head straight. I am getting there slowly. Thankfully physically this pregnancy has been a breeze so far, I am 22 weeks at the moment, and thankfully I am not showing to the outside world yet so that has helped massively in keeping it relatively quiet. The inevitable weight gain hasn't started yet which I am also relieved about, having lost almost 8 stone I am very determined to limit the damage. But all the tests, scans etc have had good results so everything is fine with the baby as far as they can tell, it is a little small (20 week scan showed the tummy measurement bang on the 50th centile, head and femur length on the 40th and 35th centile respectively), but nothing to worry about. I am at risk of a small baby anyway, so am having extra monitoring for that (doppler test at the 20 week scan, and a growth scan at 34 weeks).

We have stayed on plan in terms of paying off my loan, we have done another overpayment this month of £1000, our biggest to date, bringing the loan down to £2600ish, so we are definitely on track to have it cleared before my maternity leave starts at the end of July.

We had planned to then start tackling my husband's loan, but we are now discussing whether to just stockpile savings to enable me to take a full year of maternity leave should I want to (not having children, I don't know how I am going to feel about being a SAHM). If I return to work after 6 months, thus avoiding the 6 months of no pay, then whatever savings are there can be used to overpay my husband's loan.

That is about it from me really, I just thought I would pop in and update, as it has been on my mind that I have neglected this diary for a while.

I am now off to update my signature!

Newlywed_Saving_Ninja

Just wondering if anyone is still following my thread? If so I'll update! Wow has my life massively shifted in oh so many ways!