not feeling quite so alone

chester81

So today I had a very frank and open chat with a colleague regarding money and debt. I don't normally discuss money and work and very few people know about our 40K debts

It turns out that my colleague is in a similar position!! She also told me that she knows of several others at our workplace who are also dealing with large debts.

Whilst I don't wish misfortune on anyone, I did feel a little reassured to know that we are not alone. In my head, everyone else is so much better with money than us but in reality, perhaps we are part of a not so exclusive club!!!!

[Deleted User]

the amount of personal debt in this country is staggering,so there must be many people in simlar position,and of course there are those lucky not to be,and those who don't rely on luck,a pretty even spread i would think
what you have to do now is tackle that debt,maybe talk to one of the debt charities for a few ideas like step-change?

andyfromotley

This is the great illusion of course, that everyone else is doing fine. When the reality is that tons of those are up to their eyeballs in it!
when I see a person driving a new car I always almost cynically think, 'wonder how much their payments are on that?' As getting on for 80% of people buy them using credit.

Turningacorner_2

I know what you mean, I always think I'm the only one who doesn't seem able to manage a budget and ended up in debt, but I know there are lots of others in debt, people just have a good way of putting on a front. If you know the person well and able to share, it'll be nice to have someone to keep you encouraged and motivated and someone to talk to if things get tough.

chester81

I think that a lot of people don't realise just how much debt they are in. We have friends (couples) who will both buy brand new cars on finance probably totaling 30K plus. They don't consider this debt as they have the cars. Whilst I can sort of understand their thinking, the fact is they are probably paying out £600-700 per month on a depreciating item so it is debt.

I think that a lot of people (including me until recently) are in denial about just how much they owe. Until I sat down with the calculator I thought I owed 30K when in reality it was over 40K!!!

crazy_cat_lady

It's an eye opening moment when you sit down and go through your finances - particularly if you have nothing to show for it because it's been little frivolous bits here and there. I have a colleague at work who quite happily orders a sandwich in every day for lunch at £4 then never understands why his money runs out. I'm pleased to have had my lbm and although it's been difficult it's been a huge learning curve.
I suspect it's more 'normal' to have debt than not - if that makes sense.

uncreative

I cant tell you how much better I feel now that we are debt free. I feel a huge weight lifted off my shoulders. Currently we don't owe anyone anything except for a months rent in terms of financial commitments but we are taking on a mortgage shortly (hopefully!) of £130,000. I have worked out that we can pay it off in 10 years and that is our target, debt free and house owned by 46.

In the past, I have had a brand new mercedes leased for £350 a month and now that we have a second hand car fully paid in cash I can truly say I couldnt give a fig about cars now or what other people think. I think Will Smith sums it up best with:

"We spend money that we do not have, on things we do not need, to impress people who do not care."

timefortea

I have a colleague who I always thought of as very well off. She has a good job, partner has an even better job, really nice house, expensive cars, two holidays per year, and they just seem to spend money like it's nothing. Recently she told me that her new car cost £34k and is on finance. It's really made me think about how we only see the possessions and the nice holidays, not how they're financing it all.

Turningacorner_2

I completely agree, we live in such a commercial and materialistic world, we feel like we need to keep up and I bet lots of people have debt that they don't think of as debt, or just don't consider the levels. I have a family member who is on a well paid job and her OH earns lots in a specialist industry, but now she's about to take a pay cut and worrying about getting her cc bills down before the cuts take affect, it's all just a facade.

My OH has hardly ever had debts and he chose to take finance out on a car this year, when his died unexpectedly. He is mortified that he's now got debts and what affect it has on our lives. ...I've got a role model for sure!

I love that Will Smith quote!

redux

andyfromotley wrote: »

when I see a person driving a new car I always almost cynically think, 'wonder how much their payments are on that?' As getting on for 80% of people buy them using credit.

Someone made fun out of my slightly tatty old little car, and I replied that buying it and running it for a year cost less than 2 or 3 months depreciation on theirs, and I'm spending about a fifth of the amount in fuel.

Let them have their big ego moment. So what?