Murderer husband

Trek_girl

This is a scenario of a friend of a friend's relative so as the information is fifth hand it's better to treat it as a hypothetical situation .

The reason I am asking is because genuinely do not know how I would react to such a scenario and am curious as to how others would react.

Esther was a single parent and had a son 'John' who was a bad egg. Left school with no qualifications, became a heavy drinker, mooched off her & stole from her for drugs etc. She eventually started a relationship with 'Dave' who was not impressed by John but just tried to get on with his relationship with Esther.

After they had been married for several years Esther went on night shift and when she came back her husband had a black eye. He had been in a few fights in his life but never in the time she had known him. He said John had been round to ask for money and had got violent. He then said 'he won't be coming round again .' Which he later explained as that Esther had always enabled him but since for once John had got involved and stood up to him he will stop trying it on. He said he then watched TV and went to bed.

Esther did not hear from him for several weeks , which was not unusual but eventually after a few months she reported him as a missing person, Big issue adverts, Salvation Army etc.

After about a year his remains were found The police did interview the husband but had no evidence against him. John was a transient, had been in trouble with police, was a heavy drinker and drug user and knew lots of dodgy people.

Basically real life is not like CSI and many crimes go unsolved . Esther thinks Dave may have had something to do with her sons death but will never know. Obviously Dave will never confess and send himself to prison and it easily could have been one of John's dodgy associates. It has been many years now and she suspects the police were not too willing to 'waste' resources on the case.

Esther could divorce him for a suspicion then be left alone, or continue to live under such a shadow. You can easily say 'she should know her partner and whether she thinks he did it'. But whenever a normal sort of person murders his whole family for example people are always so shocked and say 'we would never have imagined so & so could do such a thing'. And people can and do keep major secrets from loved ones for decades without spilling the beans or being found out.

What would you do in Esther's shoes?

michelle2008

I could never stay married to someone who i suspected was capable of this crime.

There has to be trust and respect in a marriage.

girlycara

Ask him, simples

Trek_girl

girlycara wrote: »

Ask him, simples

She did, he was even interviewed by the police but denied any involvement. They do not know when he died exactly. It could have been any time from the night of the black eye to six months or so later.

London50

I am not saying it is not but if this is not a wind up/story there is no proof that the partner had anything to do with the demise of the son. As stated he was in with a wrong crowd and as most parents do the best they can for their children no matter how they are it can take an outsider to stand up to the child and tell them a few home truths. Being that this outsider is male and a fight that the "boyfriend" won the child COULD have been told that if he ever returned the same would happen so chose to steer clear rather than risk another beating.
I agree with above on the "trust" point and if she has any doubts then it is possible that the trust has gone, if so she needs to move on alone with her own life without him.
As you say there is no proof who has do this but if in years to come she finds out the boyfriend had nothing to do with it she will have to live with that but if she finds out too late he did the problems would be 100 times worse. She is between a rock and a hard place that only she can decide on how she feels and go from there.

Mojisola

Trek_girl wrote: »

It has been many years now and she suspects the police were not too willing to 'waste' resources on the case.

Esther could divorce him for a suspicion then be left alone, or continue to live under such a shadow.

If she's carried on living for years with someone she suspects killed her son, she can't be that bothered about it.

Trek_girl

Mojisola wrote: »

If she's carried on living for years with someone she suspects killed her son, she can't be that bothered about it.

My question was how would you react?

splishsplash

If I thought for one second that my live-in partner had a hand in killing my son, I'd be gone in that next second.

As Mojisola says, Esther is not apparently that bothered.

Wow.

mgdavid

Trek_girl wrote: »

My question was how would you react?

Now, or back then?
What exactly are you trying to achieve?

gettingtheresometime

If I've ever suspected anyone of anything then I've given them enough rope to hang themselves.

restless6

I would never choose a partner over my child , no matter what addictions And difficult behaviours they have .
Esther should have left her husband when he had the fight with her son and chose to help her son instead .

However this didn't happen and the niggling thought he murdered her son is still there and Always will be .
I would ŵeigh up the relationship as it is now and ask the police to look again as they can and do investigate old cases.
Regarding her husband - I would ask him again if he had any involvement and judge his reaction now . She should be able to tell if he is lying