Disableism - Are We As Aware As We Should Be?

[Deleted User]

Defined as prejudice towards the disabled.

I'm posting this link to a BBC programme after reading someone's thread in the above section of this forum about being banned from an Xbox server for a game they like to play rather than any other. I, like other's, suggested the person just change their xbox account rather than continue with their complaint. The OP possibly asked that their thread be removed as its now disappeared. I've posted the link here as some will probably call it a rant. But after watching this programme, I felt it wasn't a rant, it makes important points. And now, having watched this programme, and having seen the problems people have when making a complaint about remarks made to them on a public server.., I'd change my advice. I'm hoping (probably vainly) that others who answered that thread might too.

http://www.bbc.co.uk/iplayer/episode/b063h25f/the-ugly-face-of-disability-hate-crime

marliepanda

The user on that thread seemed to want to use his disability as an excuse for everything, that was the issue. Disabled or not, you cannot function in society acting that way and he appeared so have some understanding of that.

I work in a school which has a dedicated base for autism, so I know how broad and varied the syndrome is. But makin excuses for inappropriate behaviours under 'oh it's my autism' does not help anyone.

daytona0

With respect, but that video shows Adam Pearson who has a physical "disability" (I don't like that word). He was on Jeremy Kyle too, and he wasn't all negative on it. I believe that he did discuss how some people were naturally curious but not a pain in the !!!!.

Do you know what the difference is between Adam Pearson and the microsoft guy? One goes on Jeremy Kyle and BBC to raise awareness of his condition, and the other sits at home on the computer fighting with clans (in more than one sense) and making computers/websites. Not to knock the microsoft guy's work (it is clever stuff) but it is hardly comparable to Adam Pearson, who is a truly inspirational person.

The aspergers guy - yes people shouldn't have goaded him, BUT there was no responsibility taken by the microsoft guy and as such he was stuck in one endless loop. He sees aspergers as a big brick wall in conversing with people, so this causes people to be not very nice and then the whole thing gets worse and worse. It really isn't a discrimination issue, rather the microsoft guy perceiving every negative thing as a core attack on him and because the whole thing stems from the aspergers he will naturally see it like that. To sum it up but I tried to connect to that guy at one point, in our perceived mutual interest in Physics, and it didn't happen. Nobody has a problem with aspergers, but there is only one person who can break free of the loop if they so wish! It isn't our responsibility to vet people for psychological conditions prior to being critical in our judgement. The aspergers person got treated like a normal human being for the most part, but he just cannot see it like that. I mean it only came to light that he has aspergers when the card was played! As I recall there were absolutely no derogatory comments prior to that admission (things like: 'you are !!!!!!' or 'you must have autism' etc).

Mupette

I have a hidden disability. MS

Yes if people can't see your disability they can be damn right cruel.

Currently suffering in silence at work, manager with snide remarks with the amount of time off sick i have had, there is nothing wrong with my work.

he refuses to acknowledge information packs which are official, says management have said they are not official, don't think you can get any official than the MS Society.

I am ignored for jobs, spoken down to, every time we have a meeting it can get a little heated as he winds me up, but he recently had a heart attack, i want to confront him about his behavior in a non passive aggressive way, but i don't have the heart, i don't want to be blamed if he has another attack, as the day he had his we had a heated discussion.

I respect his illness, which they would respect mine, but they don't understand MS and refuse any information i give them to help them.

I've come across a few armchair doctors who 'know better'

OP i admire your post, maybe guilt but at least you grew a pair and sought to correct things :T

tomtontom

I'm not sure this thread is constructive - it's not fair to talk about the thread in question without xbox boy being aware of it, and if he does become aware of it, it's all going to start over again ...

But FWIW I certainly didn't see any "disableism" in the thread but quite the opposite, the OP was treated as any other poster would. I have a disability that can affect my behaviour, but if I mess up then I accept the consequences - I certainly don't play the disability card as an excuse,

Retrogamer

From how that thread developed and the links that were posted shortly before it got taken down it seems that the poster got their Microsoft Xbox Live account banned for sending abusive messages towards other users which were likely of a very offensive content.

If Microsoft ban people for sending abusive messages i don't think having a disability of some king is justification for a green light to be able to behave that way.

daytona0

Mupette wrote: »

I have a hidden disability. MS

Yes if people can't see your disability they can be damn right cruel.

Currently suffering in silence at work, manager with snide remarks with the amount of time off sick i have had, there is nothing wrong with my work.

he refuses to acknowledge information packs which are official, says management have said they are not official, don't think you can get any official than the MS Society.

Just a point which needs raising, but can anyone walk into work with one of these "official packs" and claim that they have MS? From the sounds of it, you'd probably benefit more by getting something concrete like a doctor's note.

From their perspective they might not have evidence of you having MS (an official information pack may be easily obtainable by anyone who does not have MS) and as such you will get some flak - not necessarily due to your "disability" but because they think you might be skiving.

I am ignored for jobs, spoken down to, every time we have a meeting it can get a little heated as he winds me up, but he recently had a heart attack, i want to confront him about his behavior in a non passive aggressive way, but i don't have the heart (pun intended?), i don't want to be blamed if he has another attack, as the day he had his we had a heated discussion.

Did you get blamed the first time round? Your heated discussion the last time may have contributed that time around, so what is different this time around?

Also, maybe heated discussions aren't the best thing to do? May be best speaking to another colleague/manager and using that as mediation.

I respect his illness, which they would respect mine, but they don't understand MS and refuse any information i give them to help them.

I've come across a few armchair doctors who 'know better'

So wait, are they refusing to make reasonable adjustments to your workplace? You can get them into a lot of trouble for that...

Unless you mean in regards to the number of absences. Two things:

1. Have you proven that you have MS?? If you haven't then you'll be expected to work just like any other employee.

2. Are you physically fit and able to do the work?


My initial opinion is that you haven't proven anything, and they are a bit on the fence with you; they don't want to sack you just in case you DO have MS, but they can't be sure that you don't have it either. That would explain why you get the "snide remarks" and yet you haven't been sacked. But I could be completely wrong!

geerex

I've come across quite a few disabled people who have a massive chip on their shoulder because of their condition.
I'm all for equality and helping people out, but some of these people demand far more than other people would and throw a hissy fit when they can't get what they want.

Mupette

daytona0 wrote: »

Just a point which needs raising, but can anyone walk into work with one of these "official packs" and claim that they have MS? From the sounds of it, you'd probably benefit more by getting something concrete like a doctor's note.

From their perspective they might not have evidence of you having MS (an official information pack may be easily obtainable by anyone who does not have MS) and as such you will get some flak - not necessarily due to your "disability" but because they think you might be skiving.



Did you get blamed the first time round? Your heated discussion the last time may have contributed that time around, so what is different this time around?

Also, maybe heated discussions aren't the best thing to do? May be best speaking to another colleague/manager and using that as mediation.



So wait, are they refusing to make reasonable adjustments to your workplace? You can get them into a lot of trouble for that...

Unless you mean in regards to the number of absences. Two things:

1. Have you proven that you have MS?? If you haven't then you'll be expected to work just like any other employee.

2. Are you physically fit and able to do the work?


My initial opinion is that you haven't proven anything, and they are a bit on the fence with you; they don't want to sack you just in case you DO have MS, but they can't be sure that you don't have it either. That would explain why you get the "snide remarks" and yet you haven't been sacked. But I could be completely wrong!

When i applied for this job i put on my application that i have MS, i can't see any benefit for faking such a nasty disease, in just under the 3 years i have been in this job, i have been sent to doctor call twice, i didn't see the point, but happily went, both occasions as i predicted, they didn't have much knowledge of MS, but asked me what to write, i said it wasn't for me to say.
My employers have also written to my MS Consultant to ask about my condition, he replied that they would be better off spending time talking to me about it (each one of us with MS is different) and to use the online facilities available to them, an example would be MS Society online,

I have had the very basic reasonable adjustments, a desk they refuse to raise or lower as and when i need it to, a second hand chair, and allowed other members of staff to mess around with it and break it, just got it back from repairs, i asked to work from home because the type of work i did could be done online, they said no, said my work will be covered when i am out, my manager emailed me last week to tell me he will decided as and when my work gets covered and its not a priority right now (i have clients that need reports everyday - i think that is pretty important to keep up) the reason i asked to work from home is i also have osteoarthritis in the knees and have been having a terrible time with my mobility, all ailments have been backed up with proper letters from GP's and Consultants, They did kindly give me a wheelchair to use whilst in work as and when i need it, although doors that should be left unlocked you know the type, main door with a slightly thinner side which can be opened for cages, trollies etc. i have difficulty self propelling as i have poor arm strength, oh and it also had a puncher.

I wasn't blamed for my manager having a heart attack, it turns out that he thought he had indigestion so did his gp, but he did have a heart attack due to some genetic thing to do with high cholesterol, spent a few days in hospital and a month at home recovering but i still feel guilty, I also respect he has a hidden disability now and like me stress can cause so much damage,

So yes i have proved i have MS, again who would say they do when they don't (I've had it since 2000)
its computer work, so sat at a desk basically copy and pasting 4 hours a day, mind numbing but its a job, a part time job, but least i'll not be called a benefits skiver (another story)

I feel its just not a visible thing for them to see, so they can't comprehend what is going on in my body, or care to learn.

The know by law to that to put me on their internal sickness chart it can not be for any aliments i have provided letters from gps and consultants, but still they have their digs.

Sorry this is the first time ever i have poured this out, i bite my tongue at work more times than i care to,


geerex maybe if i was treated with a bit of respect then i wouldn't have a chip on my shoulder at work, i don't throw wobbles or flounce around declaring i am disabled, just would like to be treated better.

Lack of understanding is my companies problem, shame such a big global company too, but i have tried to help them with providing official booklets, have said they can ask me anything. They just choose not to.

[Deleted User]

The reason I posted the link was the gentleman making the programme showed what happened when he made a complaint. He also pointed out that if it was a race issue it would have been dealt with, even the law gives longer sentences for the same actions if it is a race hate crime, compared to disability hate crimes. He also showed that very few people knew what Disableism was.

As someone with two in the family with ASD.., I deal with 'isms' on a regular basis. So the programme did strike a chord with me and I realised I should have had more understanding of the gentleman's thread.

The fact is that people did say they'd kill him, nothing was done, exactly as the presenter of the programme found happened to him when the same thing happened to him online. It doesn't matter if its a physical disability or a mental disability, an ism is an ism.

I can discuss my reaction to the thread even if the gentleman concerned did take the thread down. Its not like I'm attacking him !

Mupette

There are so many disabilities out that that i cant even begin to understand,

but why if someone says i have [Insert disability], why do some people assume they are waving the disability card, if we don't tell you there is something wrong, how you going to know.


Unintentionally daytona0 made an assumption that i had not told my employers of my illness, i in turn didn't make that clear in the first place, but then daytona0 sided with perhaps i was making it up. I hope i have cleared that up, my brain sometimes doesn't work with my mouth or fingers