Getting a will in place, just incase

Minerva69

hardpressed wrote: »

Will Aid is coming up in November, I think, you can then get a will at a reduced price for a donation to charity.

They only do this every 2 years and the next one isn't until November 2008: http://www.willaid.org.uk/

localhero

Hi Mae,

Yes you can do that, but I don't think doing a DIY Will is appropriate in your circumstances.

That's because there are many competing claims for your estate - not only 2 sets of children, but what about your spouse/partner?

If you leave your estate to your partner and you die first, there's no guarantee that your partner won't remarry/change their will to exclude your children from 1st relationship.

If you instead leave your estate to your children (instead of partner), your partner is then at risk of the house being sold to pay their inheritance.

Further to jets post #19, your will can be challenged for other reasons; in particular if spouse/child or other dependant believes you have made insufficient provision for them.

Then there's the issue of inheritance tax. If your combined estate is greater than £300,000 how do you provide for all your beneficiaries in a tax efficient way.

It is possible, but your will does need to be drafted with skill and precision to achieve all of the above. You therefore do need to consult a professional. Visit www.ipw.org.uk to find a regulated, qualified and insured willwriter in your area.

localhero

Hi Atpug,

With reference to your question regarding appointing guardians for children in your will, it all depends upon who has got parental responsibility. In your case if you want the children's mother to care for the children upon your death, then you don't have to name her since mothers have automatic PR for their children.

If you wished to appoint somebody differently to her, that could lead to conflict. Therefore I would word your Will to say 'if x, mother to my children a,b,c etc dies before me then I appoint.... to be guardians to any of my children who are younger than 18 when I die.

Generally, unmarried dads do not always automatically have PR for children, which means that if the mother wants the father to be guardian to the children on her death then she should make a will to appoint him as guardian. (Otherwise the local authority will decide for her). The law did change in this area on 1/12/03, so any kids born before this date to unmarried parents, the dads do not have automatic PR (in contrast to the mothers) so unless they subsequently acquire PR it is essential for wills to be drawn up (particularly by the mothers) to appoint guardians.

With children born to unmarried parents after 1/12/03 with the dad named on the birth certificate, means both do have PR.

margaretclare

Minerva69 wrote: »

My other half is training to be an advice worker with the CAB. When he went in today he asked about this and they looked at him as though he was daft! They said they have never done it and they don't do it now I guess it must have been something offered by the particular bureau that you went to. Just wanted to save somebody having to queue up at their local bureau for a service they might not provide!

Sorry about that. They definitely did it at Southend CAB and it's one of the biggest in the country - but as you say, it may have been something they did locally.

Margaret

mutley74

localhero wrote: »

Hi Atpug,

With reference to your question regarding appointing guardians for children in your will, it all depends upon who has got parental responsibility. In your case if you want the children's mother to care for the children upon your death, then you don't have to name her since mothers have automatic PR for their children.

If you wished to appoint somebody differently to her, that could lead to conflict. Therefore I would word your Will to say 'if x, mother to my children a,b,c etc dies before me then I appoint.... to be guardians to any of my children who are younger than 18 when I die.

Generally, unmarried dads do not always automatically have PR for children, which means that if the mother wants the father to be guardian to the children on her death then she should make a will to appoint him as guardian. (Otherwise the local authority will decide for her). The law did change in this area on 1/12/03, so any kids born before this date to unmarried parents, the dads do not have automatic PR (in contrast to the mothers) so unless they subsequently acquire PR it is essential for wills to be drawn up (particularly by the mothers) to appoint guardians.

With children born to unmarried parents after 1/12/03 with the dad named on the birth certificate, means both do have PR.

Hi Thanks for the detailed reply. I have full PR and have a full residence order in my favour. I doubt my son's mother will be capable of looking after my son full time and be able to put him as a number one priority.
I agree it will probably cause conflict but i really dont want my son brought up by her if i die. Any suggestions on this or advice is most welcome as this is a topic i really need to think about seriously.
thanks

margaretclare

As others have pointed out, yours is not going to be a 'simple will'. So forget doing a DIY will! You need good advice on this one.

You don't want your son's mother to bring him up if you die. OK. You're going to have to decide who you do want to bring him up and get that written into a properly-drawn up will.

I'm strongly of the belief that everyone, whatever their age and personal circumstances, should have a proper will. A 'simple will' may work if your affairs are absolutely straightforward, but otherwise, no. I'm also amazed at the number of people who want to penny-pinch on this important issue. I've been told by a practising solicitor that much of the money they earn, and many of the headaches, are caused by badly-written wills.

Margaret

localhero

Hi Atpug,

If you feel it would be in the interests of your children, then appoint a different guardian to the mother.

At the end of the day, she may not oppose your choice, and if she does you have at least made your wishes known.

The worst thing is to not make a will, leaving your children at the mercy of social services. So from what you are saying, I would make a will appointing somebody more suitable than the mother. You at least know the pros and cons.

mutley74

localhero wrote: »

Hi Atpug,

If you feel it would be in the interests of your children, then appoint a different guardian to the mother.

At the end of the day, she may not oppose your choice, and if she does you have at least made your wishes known.

The worst thing is to not make a will, leaving your children at the mercy of social services. So from what you are saying, I would make a will appointing somebody more suitable than the mother. You at least know the pros and cons.

thanks for the advice, looks like i need to think about this one seriously and ask some close friends and relatives if they will be happy to be appointed guardians. You probably wondering my reason why i dont want the mother appointed. Well after a long contact battle to see my kid again...she looked after kid for few months then completely changed her mind and said she no longer wanted full residency (just holiday contact) for my kid. He was then had to be uprooted and moved school. CAFCASS and the court DJ was shocked what she had done. Hence if anything happens to me i have no confidence she will look after him again unconditionally..and probably just dump him in a home.

thanks for your help

localhero

Hi Atpug,

You're welcome and I really sympathise with you and your child. I write wills for a living and unfortunately I am met with similar situations regularly.

It is never my place to judge the morals of the situation, merely to weigh up the practicalities of any particular course of action.

Appointing guardians is an often difficult task and so you have my every sympathy. It would seem if she did have the audacity to challenge your wishes later on, there's every chance she would fail. Therefore you are definitely doing the right thing my friend. Best wishes. :beer:

mummy_Jay

Atpug, localhero ,

thank you you both.

You've managed to bring up and talk through an issue that had really worried me. So if I grant parential responsibilty to more than one person and then name the one I wish my son to live with if something happens, if uncontested this is what would happen.

Atpug, you sound like quite a dad, I hope there more like you out there.