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Care assessment for elderly parents?

edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Over 50s Money Saving
6 replies 2.4K views
Mrs_MoneyMrs_Money Forumite
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edited 30 November -1 at 1:00AM in Over 50s Money Saving
My very elderly parents are isolated at home, managing everyday tasks with shopping help from family, but not going out or doing any social activities at all.
They don't seem to need personal care with washing or dressing, but the thing is it's the amount of things they have to do that I can see they need help with. Cleaning the house, cooking, hanging washing out etc.,
They are in their nineties and have no outside help from any external agencies and their GP seemed to be saying that they can't get help with anything other than washing/dressing/shopping - not sure he's right there.
I have suggested arranging a home care assessment - that was not received well! They are of the generation that viewed any "outsiders" coming into their home as an intrusion! I thought it would help to have a professional take on the situation and suggestions as to what could be offered, even if they decided against it in the end. Has anyone on here experienced an assessment?
One of them gets attendance allowance and both probably should, but again, my suggestion to arrange that for them was rebuffed. They have no income apart from State Pension, so may qualify for some free help- don't know.
I can't offer regular care of any kind as I am still working part time, I'm in my 60s and have a partner with severe health issues.
I know they don't seem to exist any more, but what my parents need is the old fashioned "home help" kind of person!
Anyone got any advice please? I feel we are probably working up to a crisis here...

Replies

  • pmlindyloopmlindyloo Forumite
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    Mrs_Money wrote: »
    My very elderly parents are isolated at home, managing everyday tasks with shopping help from family, but not going out or doing any social activities at all.
    They don't seem to need personal care with washing or dressing, but the thing is it's the amount of things they have to do that I can see they need help with. Cleaning the house, cooking, hanging washing out etc.,
    They are in their nineties and have no outside help from any external agencies and their GP seemed to be saying that they can't get help with anything other than washing/dressing/shopping - not sure he's right there.
    I have suggested arranging a home care assessment - that was not received well! They are of the generation that viewed any "outsiders" coming into their home as an intrusion! I thought it would help to have a professional take on the situation and suggestions as to what could be offered, even if they decided against it in the end. Has anyone on here experienced an assessment?
    One of them gets attendance allowance and both probably should, but again, my suggestion to arrange that for them was rebuffed. They have no income apart from State Pension, so may qualify for some free help- don't know.
    I can't offer regular care of any kind as I am still working part time, I'm in my 60s and have a partner with severe health issues.
    I know they don't seem to exist any more, but what my parents need is the old fashioned "home help" kind of person!
    Anyone got any advice please? I feel we are probably working up to a crisis here...

    Just replied on other thread.
  • MojisolaMojisola Forumite
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    Mrs_Money wrote: »
    My very elderly parents are isolated at home, managing everyday tasks with shopping help from family, but not going out or doing any social activities at all.
    They don't seem to need personal care with washing or dressing,

    One of them gets attendance allowance and both probably should,

    How did they get AA if they don't have any care needs?
  • AlikayAlikay Forumite
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    The one who gets the AA should be spending that on help like laundry, a cleaner and someone to do the shopping. Don't know where you live but here in the Midlands, MIL was paying £10 an hour for cleaning and laundry - 2 hours a week was sufficient for her needs as she was single, had family support with some jobs, and just living in a one-bedroomed flat. When we went on holiday the cleaner was happy to do another hour of shopping and general errands for the same hourly rate. We found the cleaner through personal recommendation from others in MIL's sheltered housing complex, but I expect you'd be able to find someone suitable via Gumtree or an ad in the local Post Office.
  • edited 21 July 2015 at 1:56PM
    lessonlearnedlessonlearned Forumite
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    edited 21 July 2015 at 1:56PM
    Your parents doctor is correct. Carers normally only do personal care, meals ie ping cuisine, and shopping. They don't usually do cleaning or laundry.

    If one of your parents gets AA then this could be used to buy in services such as cleaning, gardening, laundry.

    Basically AA is to help disabled or elderly people retain their independce as long as possible and postpone having to go into residential care.

    So it can be used for anything that helps, additional heating costs, a cleaner, chiropodist, mobile hairdressers, gardening services, taxis if they have mobility issues and can no longer drive or are not fit enough for public transport.

    When my parents got to this stage they had a cleaner, for laundry they gave up with trying to peg out washing and just used the tumble dryer. Obviously more on the leccy but cheaper than laundrettes etc.

    They also used it to pay for a chiropodist to visit them at home and a mobile hairdresser to come to their house. and of course their house was always warm and cosy.

    Your parents are doing well to be still so independent but you are wise to start thinking about their needs now.

    It might be worth contacting Age UK to see what is available in their area, also look,at the home, the way they use it, safety issues, what gadgets and gizmos might make life easier for them. The various mobility shops have all sorts of stuff. And you can get most things online.

    I suggest you contact their local Adult Social Services, they can arrange for an Occupational Therapist to assess their needs and advise on equipment. Some of it you may need to buy but some will be available on on loan.

    A bit of planning now may help to avoid a crisis, although unfortunately you can't plan away the ravages of time. They will become more frail over time and will probably need more help at some point.
  • edited 21 July 2015 at 11:20AM
    margaretclaremargaretclare Forumite
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    edited 21 July 2015 at 11:20AM
    In some areas the local AgeUK has people who can help in the home with all the jobs that carers don't do - cleaning, laundry etc. I've seen an ad for this recently and locally, but I can't find it at the moment. It may vary between different areas. I think this is what you mean by the old-fashioned 'home help' kind of person.

    Your local Age UK (in the phone book) may be able to help.

    It can be risky going down the garden to hang out washing, even though it's nice to do it in nice weather, the washing smells lovely and fresh etc. But what if one of them fell over down the garden and couldn't get up? That's why DH and I each have a mobile phone in our pocket. It has happened!

    DH has this year given up on trying to mow the lawn at the back. Reason: he fell over and attempted to move a tree root with his head. Not a good idea. This year, we have a lady gardener who comes every 2 weeks, £15 an hour, money well spent. Yes, we have AA and that's one of the things we choose to use it for.
    [FONT=Times New Roman, serif]Æ[/FONT]r ic wisdom funde, [FONT=Times New Roman, serif]æ[/FONT]r wear[FONT=Times New Roman, serif]ð[/FONT] ic eald.
    Before I found wisdom, I became old.
  • edited 21 July 2015 at 2:48PM
    Mrs_MoneyMrs_Money Forumite
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    edited 21 July 2015 at 2:48PM
    Thanks for all the suggestions. I really think a recommended person (cleaner/general helper) is the way to go. Unfortunately I've asked around and I don't know anyone who has a cleaner or is a cleaner and my parents have no friends to ask!
    Age UK is a good suggestion, I'll try it.
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