Re mortgaging question - please don't judge

Immers7

johnandkymberley wrote: »

I asked not to be judged, yet it still happens!! I don't expect anyone to empathise as I know that it's a rare situation to be in

It's a public forum. Its only natural that people will judge you about your personal life if you share details.

I hope everything works out for you and you get everything you want.

KRB2725

johnandkymberley wrote: »

Thankyou for replies. I don't know if maybe we should save half and use a credit card for the rest. Childcare costs in the future aren't an issue as I'm a childminder.

Stator - I really don't mean this to sound nasty but please don't pull out the adoption card. Adoption isn't for everyone and just because I may not be able to get pregnant naturally doesn't mean I want 'anyone's' child. I want my own, mine and my husbands. Our genes combined for a future family, not anyone else's genes. Sorry for saying but a very uneducated and niave point of view, not to mention hurtful

I am sorry for your losses and difficulties, I hope that you find a way to fund your IVF.

I totally respect the way you feel about adoption, it isn't for everyone. However, the way you describe how you see adopted children "anyone's child" and not wanting "anyone else's genes" is also quite hurtful to people that consider their adopted children very much their own.

TBeckett100

I can understand OP's point as she naturally wants to go through a pregnancy and have a part of her and him. Adoption isn't always an easy option, it's not like rehoming a wonky cat, a disturbed child could be problematic all it's life and there are many emotional pitfalls.

That said you should try for a credit card and see how that goes. What you don't want to do is be broke with a child as that causes all sorts of new stresses.

johnandkymberley

I have no problems at all or discriminate against people who have chosen adoption. It's a wonderful thing and makes people's dreams come true. For me I want 'our' baby, I want the big fat bump (again as I was quite big) and all the pain of labour! I know a couple who adopted. She had a hysterectomy in her late 20's due to complications of her reproductive health. Surrogates were her only option but they didn't want a baby that was 'half his' and 'none of hers'. It was all theirs or not at all. They adopted and got the most precious baby girl at 14 weeks old on Christmas Eve just gone. What an amazing Christmas present and they are completely besotted with her. I know what she went through and the baby is her chance at motherhood. My chance would be through IVF, I can get pregnant, I have lots of eggs due to my age. We can try naturally but it has a low chance of success. As I'm here recovering from a laparoscopy I had done on Tuesday and facing an ovarian drilling, I can't help thinking that I have to fight, for what we desperately want as a couple, our own baby xx

johnandkymberley

Bump for more replies

libf

johnandkymberley wrote: »

Bump for more replies

You best bet really is a broker if you want to go down the re-mortgage route. Otherwise, 0% credit cards if you can get one, or a loan from friends/family.