Feel like on I'm a roller coaster and I'm terrified

Triangle

As the title says - I'm on a bit of an emotional roller coaster at the moment.

For years I've been in a cycle of debt but me and DH have always just about managed. It's all our own fault (mostly mine) and I'm so ashamed. Stupid stupid living beyond our means. Circumstances haven't always helped - going back to uni, having children, working part time but these were all choices we decided to take.

I just can't juggle anymore. I've never ever missed a payment on anything before but without relying on credit I can't keep it going. I have contacted Stepchange (in tears!) and we have decided on a DMP. As things stand it will take 10 years :eek: to pay off. But I have every hope it won't be this long, especially as childcare costs will finish in two years and we will be £200/month better off.

In a way I feel positive for doing sometime about this. It was amazing to do a realistic budget and know that we will have money (if much reduced) for everything we need without just chucking things on credit. But I'm terrified too, it's such a scary prospect.

It's also a roller coaster. Despite feeling positive, I had hoped to be able to do a couple of months of token payments to get everything sorted and to start an emergency fund (never had this before!) but was advised not to do this by Stepchange this morning which has also put me on a downer.

But I really don't want a pity party - I just want to feel normal again!

Bobarella

Sorry to hear you are going through the worst part at the moment Triangle. I have not done a DMP but it seems from what others say that you will feel a lot better once it is underway. The admitting things are out of control part is always horrible whatever it is. Wishing you luck with resolving your situation quick as you can.

sourcrates

Hi,
The debt collection process can take a very long time, months, even years, before any serious action is taken, if you are all up to date with your repayments, you could quiet easily make token payments for six months before entering a DMP.

Advise from stepchange is usually good, but they tend to air on the side of caution, if you stop paying an unsecured creditor, or only make a token payment, they may run with it for a few months, your account would be passed to collections, who should try to get you to pay more, this may go on for several months, up to a year even, it may then be assigned to a DCA to attempt collection, they may then try for anything up to 8 or 9 months to get more from you, the account could then be sold, whoever buys it will try to get you to pay, they may then take court action if unsuccessful.

The point I'm trying to make is that original creditors very rarely take court action themselves, unless the sums of money involved are fairly significant, the collection process can take a long time, it's usually the new owners of debts that go the legal route.

You should be able to build up some sort of emergency fund before entering a DMP, without too much trouble.

I would simply thank SC for there advice, then write to each of your creditors, explaining that due to your current financial situation, you can only afford token payments for six months, you are seeking advice from SC etc, and you will update them in six months time.
Then go the DMP route.

lewpster

Sending a virtual hug, as what you've done this morning is the hardest part. We've all been there, and albeit you feel like you are probably the first person to ever phone Stepchange in tears it probably happens many times every day.

We are all here and going on the same journey - some will reach their goal in a few months, others take years and my DFD is 13 years away but I know this is not forever and this is worst case scenario.

Keep talking and we can all help each other to a debt free future

Triangle

Thank you all

Feeling much more positive today, spoke to Stepchage again and this time was put through to one of their debt advisors. She said it was fine to do token payments for a couple of months, such a relief. So plan is: token payments for July and August and start Stepchange DMP on 1st Seotember.

I've lots to do in meantime, need to get the new bank account sorted and make sure switch goes ok. Also been tidying up/closing old accounts and to my shock there was £200 in an basic account I haven't used for a couple of years! A great result today

Baileys_Babe

Triangle wrote: »

to my shock there was £200 in an basic account I haven't used for a couple of years! A great result today

Is this going to start the emergency fund?

How much are you hoping to have in your emergency fund come 1st September?

Glad to hear you have contacted SC and now have a plan.

maria3104

small steps and keep going forward. Good luck with your journey to a debt free life.

parsniphead

I agree with baileys babe about the emergency fund. I have just finished a DMP but never managed to get one together which caused massive issues and the breakdown of my finances towards the end.

The emergency fund is really important. Please cover yourself a little.

Glad you are feeling better.:T

Triangle

Baileys_Babe wrote: »

Is this going to start the emergency fund?

How much are you hoping to have in your emergency fund come 1st September?

Glad to hear you have contacted SC and now have a plan.

It is indeed

From reading various on threads on here, I feel that £1000 is a target to aim for. I'm not going to be able to get that by September but my plan is to get used to my new budget in July and August and the payment that will be for Stepchnage will be put in my emergency budget. Therefore I'm hoping to have about £600 in it for the DMP start date.

What are your thoughts on this? Many thanks.

Tx

Baileys_Babe

Triangle wrote: »

It is indeed

From reading various on threads on here, I feel that £1000 is a target to aim for. I'm not going to be able to get that by September but my plan is to get used to my new budget in July and August and the payment that will be for Stepchnage will be put in my emergency budget. Therefore I'm hoping to have about £600 in it for the DMP start date.

What are your thoughts on this? Many thanks.

Tx

Sounds good to me, this is exactly what I was going to suggest.

What is the plan for June regarding payments?

How do you intend to make up the short fall in the emergency fund?

Sorry for all the questions, I just want you to be as prepared as you can be

Karen777

well done and good luck - sounds like you are on the right track. things will settle down and you will be glad you took this step.