Signed off with stress - sick note end date clarification & formal meeting?

Daisychains

tomtontom wrote: »

Hence the comment about the private sector - you need to appreciate just how accommodating your employer is being, because another employer would not be nearly so.

If you want the next meeting to be moved then make a reasonable suggestion as to where you would like it to be. Do you really want it to be in a public place, where others can overhear? Do you want them coming to your home? Work may not be neutral, but in the circumstances it is probably better than the alternatives.

You're completely right, I will go to work for it, I think at home would be worse and like you say in public people may over hear. A friend is coming in with me which is helping my anxiety. Plus my medication swill hopefully kick in by time I have the meeting as the Dr said it kicks in quite quickly! X

lonestarfan

Daisychains wrote: »

Just to clarify a few things, I actually work in the public sector and I have already attended 3 meetings at work and I'm not trying to avoid contact xx

Daisy - I know it wasn't you who said avoid contact. It was another poster but I felt I neded to express my thoughts on it not being a good idea as I think it would be helpful to you and others who read the thread.
Regarding the venue for the meeting - is there an alternative employer premises suitable locally if you don't feel comfortable going into your building?
Sometimes I've done these type of meetings in local offices rather than their actual workplace. And yes definitely take a companion.

GlasweJen

The OP has had 3 meetings in 4 weeks, work know she's alive and being seen by a doctor. There is a fine line between "keeping in touch" and being over bearing to the point where it impedes recovery.

lonestarfan

GlasweJen wrote: »

The OP has had 3 meetings in 4 weeks, work know she's alive and being seen by a doctor. There is a fine line between "keeping in touch" and being over bearing to the point where it impedes recovery.

Daisy has another thread I now realise. The first meeting was to discuss the OHU report according to the other thread. The second meeting I think was what the op described as an informal meeting at 2 weeks of absence. The third meeting I think is at the 4 weeks point and has just been attended. The op will correct me if I'm wrong.
That's all seems quite reasonable as my employer would expect a conversation at least weekly but probably wouldn't have had an informal meeting at 2 weeks but definitely would have a discussion about the ohu report so that they can get adjustments in place quickly to facilitate a return to work quicker.
At the 4 week stage my employer is looking for prospect of return in the near future. If the employee is saying they are unclear of when they'll return then my employer starts to progress towards formal hearings to make a decision on continued employment.
I've noticed in the last few years that the way in which absences of 4 weeks or longer are addressed has changed. They're addressed much more quickly now.
It's a fixed term contract too so that could have a bearing.
It's Daisy's first job which is sad to be experiencing such stress and all this may be daisys first experience of how employers manage absences. They do seem to be trying to put support in place though.

GlasweJen

Before the OP even had a sick line she was being cajoled into seeing occupational health!

I've been off for pretty much identical amount of time for the same reason, only difference being I've worked for my company for 2 years.

My work knew why I was off as I spoke to them 4 days before my breakdown and told them "I'm on the verge of a nervous breakdown, my sleep is affected and I can't cope" so maybe that's why my boss has backed off.

In the first week he texted a few times, when he got my sick line all communication died until I emailed to say that I'd been given another sick line due to a deterioration (caused by a drug interaction - oops) and then he asked last week if I was ready to talk on the phone and I said no way (I've developed a fear of answering the phone!) and said I'd come in and speak to him but only with my other half in and not speaking to my oaf of a line manager.

I'm dreading it and will probably be spaced out on Valium but he can have his meeting, what's discussed at the meeting and what's discussed with my GP are two completely different things. For all he knows I could have another medication reaction between now and going back (at the start of May) or my new fear of answering the phone will get worse instead of better.

Is there any point in this meeting? Probably not but I am going to take it as an opportunity to highlight what needs fixed to facilitate me going back (a lot). If he had had this meeting 2 weeks ago he would have been repeating himself come this one.

lonestarfan

You may see it as cajoled. The manager will see it as getting the professionals involved. A manager should not be trying to be a medical professional.
My employer will get an immediate OHU referral from day one for stress absences. It won't wait 4 weeks. Early intervention is crucial precisely to avoid "all communication died" and employees being left in a void. The employee may want a void but my employer has a business to run and is going to manage the absence as opposed to leave it to manage itself or let the employee manage it.
A recent policy decison has been made to manage the managers who are not sticking to the triggers and the warnings in handling absence - giving them support so they can do it and if they continue to not do it then they will be subject to formal procedures themselves so absence management is definitely an issue in modern day UK which is going to be handled across many businesses more robustly.

Having said that I do work for a very reasonable employer who has facilitated many reasonable adjustments for me and others at a cost and will endeavour to support people with stress issues. A recent new psychological service my employer has launched has received lots of positive feedback from staff referred to it for stress.
Daisychains employer does seem to have listened to what she's said about her stress and seem to be trying to alter things for her. I hope her GP is doing the same.

GlasweJen

My work have no occupational health service so looking at it my manager probably just has no clue how to deal with me, we also have another person off with stress but he has just disappeared off radar.

datlex

Daisychains wrote: »

Just to clarify a few things, I actually work in the public sector and I have already attended 3 meetings at work and I'm not trying to avoid contact xx

Not surprised you are off with stress working in the public sector. I did wonder when I read the word "trigger" in your post. It is one that I have heard come up amongst people I know that work for the public sector. I am guessing the very word itself has made you feel more stressed?


Firstly I know it is hard but think of yourself first. Your employer will want you back at work when you are ready to be back, they won't want you back early.


Secondly remember it is in your employers interest to help you. Be honest with them as to the work related causes of your stress. (though remember not to be personal).


Thirdly, don't be panicked into getting a new sick not early just because you have a meeting with work. You can quite legitimately say that your current sick note expires on x but that you will be going to doctor for them to confirm whether they feel you are ready to go back to work.

Daisychains

datlex wrote: »

Not surprised you are off with stress working in the public sector. I did wonder when I read the word "trigger" in your post. It is one that I have heard come up amongst people I know that work for the public sector. I am guessing the very word itself has made you feel more stressed?


Firstly I know it is hard but think of yourself first. Your employer will want you back at work when you are ready to be back, they won't want you back early.


Secondly remember it is in your employers interest to help you. Be honest with them as to the work related causes of your stress. (though remember not to be personal).


Thirdly, don't be panicked into getting a new sick not early just because you have a meeting with work. You can quite legitimately say that your current sick note expires on x but that you will be going to doctor for them to confirm whether they feel you are ready to go back to work.

Thanks I'm dreading ringing work to tell them about the new sick note as I was due back this week I thought I could manage it but I can't. That being said my medication has stopped most of the physical anxiety attack symptoms so I don't feel as ill physicslly, but still very emotionally unstable etc.

Work have arranged a lot of things for me eg breaks in between talking with clients and things, they've bent over backwards for me but this is making me feel even more guilty

My contract ends in a few months time. So I'm not sure what will happen, in my letter it says they will consider after my next meeting if my abscense can still be supported.

I want to go back but I'm scsred of going back too soon, my gp suggested a phased return to work once I feel able, probably after this week but I'm seeing him again on Friday. He did actually say I habe 'low mood' as well as stress but this isn't on my sick note, he has just left it as 'stress at work'

Anyway thanks for all the replies it's been really helpful x

Daisychains

Also do you guys think I should ask about SSP? I've not received an ssp1 form and sick pay hasn't been mentioned at all, which is another worry but really don't want to ask them x