Ex cleared joint account and left me with credit card debt

misscarr

Hi All,

Sorry if this is on the wrong board, I just urgently need advice!

My (ex)fianc! and I had a joint account, that we were using to pay bills as well as save for a wedding. I was putting in my entire wage, and he was putting in - as it turns out - what ever he saw fit. I had no other accounts, and we had this in place for nearly 4 years.

Last week I put a deposit on a wedding venue, on Sunday he cleared the joint account of all our savings, and left me with half a wage to live off. I also have 2.5k of his debt on a credit card in my name, that he is refusing to contribute to now that we have separated.

This came completely out of the blue, and he has given me no explanation as to why he has done it.


The bank have said there is nothing they can do to reclaim what is rightfully mine, is there anything that can be done?

We lived in his house, and I contributed to all payments over 5 years, including household wares. I have been left with nothing!

Any ideas at all are much appreciated.

sourcrates

Hi,
What a !!!! !!!

Unfortunately if the credit card debt is in your name, then you are responsible for it (as long as you signed the agreement).

The bank is right, with a joint account you both have equal access, and equal liability.
Once money has been withdrawn, its out of the banks hands.

I know that's not what you want to hear right now, but i`m afraid there is very little you can do.

Can you get the wedding deposit back ?

I would certainly look into this ASAP.

Siamese

I'm sorry about your break up and the money situation. I can't help but feel you've dodged a bullet though - you really wouldn't have wanted to be married to such a thieving, lying, little toad.

Don't think there's anything you can do about the joint account, but I suppose you could try asking for your money back in writing.
Are there any household items you bought on the credit card? Could you get them back and sell them? You need to look for a paper trail really (receipts?). Maybe if you make enough of a pain in the bum of yourself he'll give you something back. Or, as you've paid your 'rent' for the month, refuse to move out (I wouldn't, though)

Don't forget to let his friends, family and his new girlfriend know about this stunt.

misscarr

I agree, definitely dodged a bullet!

I only had the joint account, so any receipts or proof of purchase came from that account too.

Its now closed and I have one of my own.

Very tempted to publicly shame his behaviour, but to be honest its all so raw and I'm embarressed at how much of a mug he's taken me for!

Brightspark87

hi lots of us have been through similar be glad a) you got out now and b) it was £2,500 not £15,000 like mine... x

Siamese

misscarr wrote: »

I agree, definitely dodged a bullet!

I only had the joint account, so any receipts or proof of purchase came from that account too.

Its now closed and I have one of my own.

Very tempted to publicly shame his behaviour, but to be honest its all so raw and I'm embarressed at how much of a mug he's taken me for!

Don't be embarrassed about being 'taken for a mug'. The normal thing to do is trust a partner and, sometimes, that bites you on the bum. It's much more of a reflection on him, and I think he'll be ashamed of his behaviour one day (particularly as he let you book a venue for a wedding he knew wouldn't happen - I'd really try and get that back). I would tell anyone who asked what happened the truth. All of it.
Make sure your name is off any joint utility bills and the council tax and if there is a surplus ask them to send you a cheque for the balance.

Pixie5740

Your ex sounds like a world class A-hole and as you realise you have dodged a bullet.

If you haven't already, open a new current account and make sure your salary is paid into it from now on.

Close down the joint account. You don't want him having access to any more of your money or wracking up an overdraft as well.

As for the CC debt, what is it for exactly? Did you transfer his debt on to a 0% card for him or was it used to buy things for him? If it's the latter can you sell these items?

I think the best revenge you can do is to just keep your cool and get on with your life as tempting as it might be to try and get even or let his friends and family know what he is like.

Did you live together? If so where? Rented accommodation or do you own a place together?

satchmo1

Are you still at "his" house? Sell things from that house to get back your £2500, preferably on a closed FB local selling page under a new FB account that he isn't "friends" with. Don't go over that amount, though, so you can maintain your integrity. Then count your blessings that you escaped before marrying that low-life.

pineapple123

Telling his family and friends what he is like will not make you feel better or get your money back.
It must be an awful time for you just now but things will get better. Sending you a hug.

Bobarella

Miss Carr - I am so sorry to hear your news, if you know a few burly men I think no one would blame you for sending them round to whereever your scum bag ex is hiding. There can be no plausible reason for what he has done to you, none at all.
Are you in touch with his parents at all? My only thought is perhaps you could have a word with them, and see what they say? If it was my son I'd be disgusted & have a strong word immediately.

-taff

It could be possible for you to to make a claim in equity in the house, especially as you were engaged, although it depends on how far you are willing to go.
Me, I would do my very best to make his life as difficult as possible.

http://www.mylawyer.co.uk/rights-to-the-shared-home-if-you-break-up-a-A76051D34488/